Tell Us Your Worst Burning Man Experience

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Sun Jun 01, 2008 1:04 pm

(including the stupid kid - I call him that but he was actually 30...)

so, this "kid" that you speak of..

you want him whacked?

there is a mafioso theme camp this year....ask for Sammy "the Bull-Shit" Graveonu, he'll help you out.....word has it he has a good line on x too.

CLARKcon · Post by **CLARKcon** » Sun Jun 01, 2008 5:43 pm

Another sorry feeling one year (and didn't happen to me): Walking past some dome tents, happy & melancholy. Turn the corner to see an ambulance (a real ambulance, NOT a "flashy" lit art car

). Saw a gentle men on trampoline and paramedics trying to help out: Did a nasty hop and one leg between the springs touching the ground...springs had scratced/sliced all the way up the leg. That put a sour note on my afternoon

gidget · Post by **gidget** » Tue Jun 03, 2008 5:12 pm

Simon of the Playa wrote: so, this "kid" that you speak of..

you want him whacked?

Thankfully I think he decided not to come back ever again... but if I do see his ugly mug on playa ...

Post by **mdmf007** » Sun Jun 08, 2008 1:20 am

awesome story - at least you go that out of it!

Post by **mdmf007** » Sun Jun 08, 2008 1:21 am

mischterious · Post by **mischterious** » Sun Jun 08, 2008 2:50 am

[quote="dr.placebo"]My worst Burning Man experience has not happened yet, but someday it will.

It will be the year I can't go.[/quote]

so very true. that is some real insight right there.

EB · Post by EB » Thu Jun 12, 2008 1:11 pm

gidget wrote:...then the stupid kid took candy from a stranger and ended up assulting some guy with his own artwork.

Best. Sentence. Ever.

Oldguy · Post by **Oldguy** » Sat Jun 14, 2008 10:49 pm

My first year I put out a solar oven with a bowl of soup. I went out to see the sites and when I returned someone or something had pissed in my soup. Also in front of my tent door someone or something had dumped a load. It sure looked human to me. I got some tissue and cleaned it up. I then pedaled on down to the Ranger spot to find out what I should do about it. I was told I should not have cleaned up the shit untill a ranger had looked at it, that it might just be dog poop. "Hummm", I thought. Anyway, I thought ," I'm not going to ask my neighbors, "Did you piss in my soup? ". So I took the not too discreet hint, and just simply moved my camp across town. No other problems of consequence in the last 5 years.

JezebelinHell · Post by **JezebelinHell** » Sun Jun 15, 2008 7:55 am

We were camped less than 100 yards from Camp Yodel in 2004. As amusing as the yodeling is at noon, it's less funny when it's coming at you full-blast at 8:00 in the morning.

Toolmaker · Post by **Toolmaker** » Sun Jun 15, 2008 4:10 pm

Got into Reno only to find out the fella driving me and camping with me needed a bunch of money to get his RV going. Shelling out money to later find out that it was for a shower that wasn't needed. Getting to BM and having the fuckwit hoard 200 gallons of water just for his own RV shower when I bought the drums rather than use the drums for a theme camp we were in that had a most excellent shower. Finding the kiddie pool behind the RV on the street so the frontage would be cosmetically appealing. This resulted in lots of pissing in the kiddie pool and dumping of other grey water. Having the guy flake out on my shrooms reserved for Fri and Sat as early as Wed refusing me in the back of the RV where my RSD pain meds were stashed. Finding out Wed afternoon that my pain meds were taken already since he ran out of his own on Tues and that I should just smoke weed for my nerve pain. Aforemtnioned fucktard left Thurs taking the most expensive shit I bought for this "co-op" like couches and a trialer and 5 55 gal drums etc and leaving me stranded. I wound up giving away my tent, cooler, food and a bunch of other gear and burning up most of my clothes in the car b q. Luckily I found a ride to Reno and made it home though there was a pool table from craigslist that I bought that someone else had to haul away for me.

Radical Self Reliance... I learned the hard way.

Dont trust anyone you haven't camped with or personally know well, even if they are related to a friend.

Oh yeah.. ESD isn't setup for meds.. if you have med needs keep them on you AT ALL TIMES! Do not allow anyone access to your meds.. especially if you have RSD or something else nasty.

I'm just glad I was camped with some righteous folks that helped me get sorted.

Apollonaris Zeus · Post by **Apollonaris Zeus** » Sun Jun 15, 2008 8:30 pm

leaving!

sunn · Post by **sunn** » Sun Jun 15, 2008 10:24 pm

My first mistake was in befriending a virgin burner who got kicked out of her camp; there was a reason. By the third day of having her eat our food (and never offer to help clean up), lounge around all day, and then make snide remarks to the women when the guys weren't around, it was just too much. Oh, she also had a little stealing problem beside. After being in the med tent 3x in 24 hours for a medical problem, I was actually relieved when my s.o and I decided to leave early. Never thought I would want to go before the burn!
However, I have to remember that there were also many amazing people I met last year, offsetting one person who just shouldn't have come.

Token · Post by **Token** » Mon Jun 16, 2008 12:15 am

One day after some steamy lovin' in the ol' tent with the Mrs, I reached over and grabbed the baby wipes tub to do some cleansing of the private bits...

.. turns out my darling also packed Clorox kitchen wipes ... with bleach.

ouch!

Intubater69 · Post by **Intubater69** » Mon Jun 16, 2008 6:51 am

Token wrote:One day after some steamy lovin' in the ol' tent with the Mrs, I reached over and grabbed the baby wipes tub to do some cleansing of the private bits...

.. turns out my darling also packed Clorox kitchen wipes ... with bleach.

ouch!

That made me turtle just thinking about that one........

Post by **mdmf007** » Mon Jun 16, 2008 7:53 am

Token wrote:One day after some steamy lovin' in the ol' tent with the Mrs, I reached over and grabbed the baby wipes tub to do some cleansing of the private bits...

.. turns out my darling also packed Clorox kitchen wipes ... with bleach.

ouch!

So you dont get that fresh, cooling clean feeling from clorox wipes?

Steven bradford · Post by **Steven bradford** » Mon Jun 16, 2008 9:02 am

My worst BM experiences have invariably involved someone on a megaphone.

Actually not true. That's second worst. Worst would be hearing the guy who jumped of the Church of Mez tower thump on the playa. That was 2k I think.

gyre · Post by **gyre** » Mon Jun 16, 2008 9:51 am

Token wrote:One day after some steamy lovin' in the ol' tent with the Mrs, I reached over and grabbed the baby wipes tub to do some cleansing of the private bits...

.. turns out my darling also packed Clorox kitchen wipes ... with bleach.

ouch!

Also not a good idea to fill a tub with champagne.
No matter how cute the other person is....

Token · Post by **Token** » Mon Jun 16, 2008 10:35 am

mdmf007 wrote:
Token wrote:One day after some steamy lovin' in the ol' tent with the Mrs, I reached over and grabbed the baby wipes tub to do some cleansing of the private bits...

.. turns out my darling also packed Clorox kitchen wipes ... with bleach.

ouch!
So you dont get that fresh, cooling clean feeling from clorox wipes?

Oh, it was tingly fresh for ~ a minute or two. That was the tricky part; at first it felt OK, just like a regular baby wipe, then the burn set in. The damage was already done before I even noticed.

I could describe the experience however it would be rather graphic. This is a family show, right?

Suffice it to say, there was much swelling (in a not good way) and irritation.

Barbie · Post by **Barbie** » Mon Jun 16, 2008 12:21 pm

Before the Burn 2006 I was hanging out, with one of my favorite friends on Lake Berryesa...
His friend decided he wanted to go to the BURN with me-soooooo I canceled other plans to come home to BRC.
We rented a Van (I gave him 500 dollars toward van rental let alone all the food and booze I went in on and the gas there) Drove from Sonoma CO. Got there set up camp-lost my camp, found where I always camp and BRC buddies-moved camp over to their area.

He stayed two days and walked between the two camps; using their bathrooms-NEVER EVEN making to one of the portapottie or to the end of the street, or out to see the man or any ART or anything. So I come back from a bike ride and he is packed up and ready to go. (if I wouldn't have come back to camp right THEN he would have been GONE) I still have stuff in the Van (this includes money I have hidden in VAN) he is gonna leave me WITH EVERYTHING and NO RIDE his bike my bike coolers big water bottles.

I HAVE NEVER FOUND MY SHIT AND PACKED A VAN QUICKER IN MY LIFE.
I was soooooo glad to have him leaving. IN ALL MY RUSH thinking how I'm gonna store food and water. I forget the most important real world thing money. ( I like to mention here that I DON't have CC cards and never have-and the guy of course didn't find my money in van)

SOOOOOOO I have to find a ride back to life and don't have any MONEY TO OFFER FOR GAS. Had my ride drop me off at the Sac. train Station where I had to wait HOurs for my other friend to come get me. (I looked like I was homeless- all covered in dust with ALL MY stuff LOL)

ANd ya Know What SUCKS about the whole thing -is that GUY who left me went back and talked a bunch of shit to my other friends wife and now HE'll Never ever get to GO to Burning Man.
Lesson Learned

Dr. Pyro · Post by **Dr. Pyro** » Mon Jun 16, 2008 1:41 pm

Barbie, the guy would have to have been a complete idiot to leave you. What an asshat. I can assure you we would never do such a thing. Hell, we're doing everything we can to keep you!

Barbie · Post by **Barbie** » Wed Jun 18, 2008 12:55 pm

Ohhh Ken aka Dr Pyro your soooo sweat

He was like 70 years old and I should not have tried sooooo hard to talk my other friend in to going in front of him. (You know ya can get right before the BURN) And when he did say he wanted to go- I should have known better. Always go with your gut feeling about people. I just gave this guy a chance 'cause I THOUGHT HE NEEDED TO BURN. I was wrong and I've given up trying to talk people in to coming who don't want TO- 'cause they shouldn't go until they WANT TO GO

Dr. Pyro · Post by **Dr. Pyro** » Thu Jun 19, 2008 8:34 am

Amen sister. There are plenty of people out there who have no business even contemplating going to Burning Man, and I am not referring to the "frat boyz" type (God I hate that term, so demeaning). I had an old girl friend from NYC and I told her about BM and thought she'd love it. Turns out she's violently allergic to alkali dust. Oops, my bad. And I have plenty of friends whom I love dearly but they would be your proverbial fish-out-of-water: intolerant of "weirdos", resentful of rave music and the non-stop whump whump whump all hours of the night, people who can't stand being dirty most of the time, lack of sleep, the heat, and on and on it goes. But of course Burning Man shouldn't be for everybody; what is, after all? I'm just glad it's for us!

ZaphodBurner · Post by **ZaphodBurner** » Thu Jun 19, 2008 10:29 am

Best: Arriving at our first burn at night, after hitting a dear on the Oregon/CA border and thinking we weren't gonna be able to make it at all because they had no radiators within a three-day order and shipping period...only to find the EXACT radiator we needed on a pile beside the paint shop in Lakeview, right where our van creaked to a halt. The first time we saw the lights of BRC that night, it was like something out of Hotel California.

Worst: Standing at the temple in 2005 with a bunch of New Orleaneans who were basically all in shock, listening to that self-righteous so-called Reverend fraud rumor-mongering about Katrina through a bullhorn about black people in New Orleans "being taken into concentration camps" against their will, while somebody's passing around a newspaper showing bodies floating in the river. NICE. The NOLA people on the playa were struggling with life-changing trauma and the realization that what they brought with them is probably all they have left in the world, and there are people up there spreading bullshit about concentration camps, Republicans blowing up the levees and every other rumor they could pile on those poor people. That's just what all those people gathered at temple needed to hear, I'm sure. I can't even describe how close I got to getting up there and stomping that tactless, clueless motherfucker.

...wow. That was kind of carthartic. I think I'll go have a cookie.

Marscrumbs · Post by **Marscrumbs** » Thu Jun 19, 2008 11:35 am

Exodus, almost every year, but last year especially. I was pulling a small trailer and an over loaded pickup I thought my clutch would die at any moment, stop and go. Was so happy to arrive back in my driveway without incident. Was my first road trip with a trailer ever.

gyre · Post by **gyre** » Thu Jun 19, 2008 1:46 pm

Dr. Pyro wrote: And I have plenty of friends whom I love dearly but they would be your proverbial fish-out-of-water: intolerant of "weirdos", resentful of rave music and the non-stop whump whump whump all hours of the night, people who can't stand being dirty most of the time, lack of sleep, the heat, and on and on it goes.

Hey! That's me you're talking about!

Marscrumbs, you should talk to the org about your experience and suggest a hold then go traffic arrangement.
Cars can be parked in line NOT BURNING GAS for a period until a space is clear and then that line can go and then the next and so on.
The creep then stop, creep then stop is not good for anyone.
And especially those towing trailers.

ibdave · Post by **ibdave** » Thu Jun 19, 2008 4:58 pm

gyre wrote:

Marscrumbs, you should talk to the org about your experience and suggest a hold then go traffic arrangement.
Cars can be parked in line NOT BURNING GAS for a period until a space is clear and then that line can go and then the next and so on.
The creep then stop, creep then stop is not good for anyone.
And especially those towing trailers.

That idea is a great one indeed, but until they can stop the line jumpers from cutting into the moving line then it can't work. Think about the aner that happens in exodus.. It just blows my mind how fast people change when the get the I got to get home syndrome... They can't wait in line... It even happens trying to get into BRC.... Thread drift over, go back to topic now...

TomServo · Post by **TomServo** » Fri Jun 20, 2008 1:29 am

Burning Man 1999
My very first night on the playa, I had 48 hours of no sleep..due to anticipation..not drugs.. We had set up, and were out exploring..myself mostly nude..and drinking Natural Ice. Walking back towards 8:30 from the man, suddenly all the lights of the city were car headlights..I panicked, and somehow, lost my companions. While I made it back to the general 8:30 are, I was totally lost. I spent about 3 hours looking for my camp. When I finally found it, I collapsed. Woke up a couple hours later, to tremendous wind gusts.. all the frame pieces of my tent were coming apart...this is when I fell in love with duct tape..i wrapped the tape around each seam of the frame. Then ran off to the porta potties..naked and bare foot..bad idea.. The next morning, everything I "thought I knew about camping" was tossed out the window.

TomServo · Post by **TomServo** » Fri Jun 20, 2008 1:38 am

Steven bradford wrote:My worst BM experiences have invariably involved someone on a megaphone.

Actually not true. That's second worst. Worst would be hearing the guy who jumped of the Church of Mez tower thump on the playa. That was 2k I think.

Megaphones are annoying, however I loved the soup advisory board, riding around the city yelling out soup recipes

scruffyboy · Post by **scruffyboy** » Sat Jul 26, 2008 2:38 am

BM 2008 why? cuz I'm not going this year

TomServo · Post by **TomServo** » Sat Jul 26, 2008 2:56 am

TomServo wrote:
Steven bradford wrote:My worst BM experiences have invariably involved someone on a megaphone.

Actually not true. That's second worst. Worst would be hearing the guy who jumped of the Church of Mez tower thump on the playa. That was 2k I think.
Megaphones are annoying, however I loved the soup advisory board, riding around the city yelling out soup recipes

If what I said makes any sense let me know. It doesn't to me...

have had tons of bad experiences at BM..but then so do in life..

was really upset to hear about the two sisters killed en route to Burning Man...by the cashier at Verdi's gas station.. 2002?

Tell Us Your Worst Burning Man Experience

worst experience