What was the craziest/funniest thing you saw this year?

carn1fex · Post by **carn1fex** » Tue Sep 02, 2008 10:59 am

Though I've heard some far funnier ones, mine goes to my brother.. whom thursday night on a trek to bother women near Nexus i hear him say "Hey there.. you guys like led zeppelin?" I turn around to find that hes talking to a pile of well decorated bicycles. Wow hahaha im putting that quote on his grave.

PlayaPunk · Post by **PlayaPunk** » Tue Sep 02, 2008 12:53 pm

The craziest thing I saw was when I opened one of my rubbermaid boxes where I kept food, in preparation for breakfast. Much to my surprise was a set of panties and dirty socks. No idea of who would bestow such a gift, but it was pretty damn funny.

zabsinth · Post by **zabsinth** » Tue Sep 02, 2008 1:32 pm

22 year old dude from minnesota named "poopsie" who snuck into my camp in the back of his friend's truck and bummed cigs from me all week having a very bad salvia trip while the rest of us were packing up...

we took good care of him, but I have to say that I chuckled a bit every time he said 'wait, where am I?' or something along those lines...

gyre · Post by **gyre** » Tue Sep 02, 2008 4:07 pm

For surprize packing, how about the guys who opened up their rental truck to find the neighbor's cat, and none too amused either.

Faithn808 · Post by **Faithn808** » Tue Sep 02, 2008 9:42 pm

Morning, maybe 10:00 am in the portapotties at 4:30 and Impala: I was sitting there and heard a door next to me open, and a girl say "dude, you 've been in there a long time!" And another female voice from in the stall, "Oh man... thanks for getting me. Whoa... I forgot where I was, dude! I was totally tripping in the bathroom!" She stumbles out and I watched the first girl help the other back to camp :) Nothing like tripping balls in a portapottie!!!

mars · Post by **mars** » Tue Sep 02, 2008 9:54 pm

When my friend came out of his RV with a fresh bacon mask on his face.

BitterDan · Post by **BitterDan** » Tue Sep 02, 2008 10:08 pm

Craziest thing I saw was at the tavern when some drunk decided to try to come behind the bar and when he was stopped by our bartender he tried to take a swing. Our bartender pinned him to the ground and then dragged him out of the bar at which point about 20 cops showed up.

Another crazy thing was when the sheriffs raided our bar and shut us down for an hour or so because some guy passed out drunk. They had 2 sheriffs blocking the entrance to the bar as they looked around for anything illegal (of which they found none since Moonshine is legal to possess).

poisenloaf · Post by **poisenloaf** » Tue Sep 02, 2008 10:13 pm

I actually saw the maiden voyage of the rubber/disco/golden duck.. It was quite a production and totally reminded me of something out of a Star Trek episode when the Enterprise is leaving spacedock and all the gantries are pulling away before it sets sail so to speak. There was a lift and a guy was literally polishing the head and lighting the flames before takeoff..hilarious (could have been the shrooms). They should have broke a bottle of champagne of the bow before taking her out. hehe

Gage · Post by **Gage** » Tue Sep 02, 2008 10:38 pm

We were sitting back from the man, as the Burn commenced. Beautiful. Memorable. Romantic.

As my s/o and I are sitting there, we get mad rushed by a few thousand people, leaving the burn area and heading towards us and the 9:00 Plaza / Root Society areas!! It was so wild, watching the man burn behind the masses of people stampeding our way!!

By the way, I recommend it... we were laughing our asses off after the first wave hit

Clar-i-ty · Post by **Clar-i-ty** » Wed Sep 03, 2008 9:30 am

We were sitting in a piano cafe just off center camp when Critical Dicks rolled by and the piano player broke into Chariot's of Fire. It was one of those perfectly random playa moments!

mars · Post by **mars** » Wed Sep 03, 2008 10:18 am

I was sitting on the playa at night and a lost woman came up asking for directions. She was lost, tired and had no water on her.

She said she would love a ride from an art car but had "bad art car karma". I said, "Well we have great art car karma, I'll call for one right now." I picked up a glow stick and put it to my ear like a telephone and "called" for an art car. Less then a minute later, the woman started to walk away. I knew she was making a mistake and I turned around to see an art car coming toward us from behind.

I called to her to wait and the car pulled up. I told them the woman walking over there needs a ride. They went over to her and offered her a ride. She asked where they were going (we were at 9 and she was going to 3). They said they were stopping mid-playa. She said, well thanks, that's not where i'm going and they took off.

My friend yelled to her..."That's not "bad art car karma", that's *idiotic*...next time an art car offers you a ride in your direction, take it!"

Post by **AntiM** » Wed Sep 03, 2008 12:08 pm

An asshole put a cigarette out on MyLarry's forehead.

We hauled the fuel cart out to the Man early, on foot, in the white-out, taking the long way round the 9 o'clock promenade so we could navigate by the lamp spires. It sucked, but we had to be there. We hunkered down and waited. The conclave eventually shows up with one of their camp in a handicapped cart. The people who've been arriving to sit on the perimeter give the guy in the cart a bad time, especially one obnoxious dick who wanted a clear view of the burn. So when they pulled us all back to sit by the perimeter after the show was canceled, we knew exactly who we'd sit in front of, which was in all honesty, where we would have sat anyway.

The Dick was smoking just a few feet from the fuel cart. Larry went over and asked him nicely if he'd put it out, it was dangerous, blah blah. The Dick replied with "whatever" and kept smoking. Larry asked again. The guy mumbled he was there first. Right. Larry pinched out most of the cherry with his gloved hands. The guy reached out and stubbed it out on Larry head. Larry grabbed the guy's fingers and forced them back so he'd drop the butt. The Dick yelled, "I'm going to punch you out!" "Go ahead," said Larry as he walked away. Chickenshit didn't stand up.

We thought about requesting LEOs, but Larry would have had to miss the burn doing paperwork and I'd have been stuck with the fuel cart, on foot. We did ask the rangers to move the guy so he wasn't near us, as in, not having a front row seat, but they were swamped. Asswipe claimed Larry threatened him, but Genius and Mendy know Larry well enough to know that was total BS. Larry doesn't threaten, he acts.

Larry sat on the cart with his back to the guy so the Dick had time to contemplate the old biker's colors on Larry's leather vest. It was only from the relatively mild Japanese-American Harley group he used to ride with in Yokosuka, but the guy didn't know that. He did light another cigarette, but out it out when Larry picked up a gallon of water and gave him a pointed look. (We wish we'd thought to just use the fire extinguisher). I sat behind the cart at one point, and made eye contact while I was drinking some water, and he was really sweating his actions, apologizing to me and whining that he didn't want trouble. I told him I wasn't the one who needed an apology. When the perimeter dropped, this guy, his girlfriend and friend got up and headed away from us as fast as they could. The man next to him came over and told us he'd be a witness, but it was far too late. Sure, we had conclave members willing to grab him, but that would have been ugly and wasn't worth the trouble.

No way was this ass a burner, he was wearing clean shorts and a polo shirt and left his beer cans on the ground. I should have leaned in and whispered "Altamont." I figure any person who is such an asshole will get what they deserve eventually.

And a great member of the conclave made sure we had a ride home on a big ass art car; first time I'd been up on top of one. Yay Clay!

carn1fex · Post by **carn1fex** » Wed Sep 03, 2008 12:51 pm

Oh i forgot one.. thursday afternoon near 7:00 and B.. Late 30s dude on satellite phone talking loudly: "Ok could you tell mommy that Daddy is camping and wont be back until sunday? And could you wish her a happy anniversary for me?"

EB · Post by EB » Wed Sep 03, 2008 2:46 pm

Anti M,

That sounds fucking awful. All the while a giant dust storm is swirling about... (Thanks for you and YourLarry's volunteering at Burn Perimeter and for the work you do mod'ing the ePlaya.)

gyre · Post by **gyre** » Wed Sep 03, 2008 3:28 pm

Wow, Antim, that really tops having a drunk throw a drink on me.

Do you think it would help if I wore my originals out there?

As you know, I usually just wear khakis and a frat shirt.

Post by **AntiM** » Wed Sep 03, 2008 3:31 pm

gyre wrote:Wow, Antim, that really tops having a drunk throw a drink on me.

Do you think it would help if I wore my originals out there?

As you know, I usually just wear khakis and a frat shirt.

Naw ... he far surpassed the basic frat shirt look into tourist.

gyre · Post by **gyre** » Wed Sep 03, 2008 3:45 pm

By originals, I meant the denim vest.
I would think it might attract trouble with yahoos.

Clar-i-ty · Post by **Clar-i-ty** » Wed Sep 03, 2008 4:13 pm

[quote="carn1fex"]Oh i forgot one.. thursday afternoon near 7:00 and B.. Late 30s dude on satellite phone talking loudly: "Ok could you tell mommy that Daddy is camping and wont be back until sunday? And could you wish her a happy anniversary for me?"[/quote]

Now that's a burner! That's f'ing awesome!

oleg8888 · Post by **oleg8888** » Wed Sep 03, 2008 8:57 pm

Thursday, 1AM waiting for the gate to start functioning.
I grab a walkie-talkie and head to the front of the line to find out the holdup.
Minutes later my wife comes on radio saying there are 4 hindu looking guys wondering around heading my way.
Minutes later I see them.
Indeed, 4 hindu guys, wearing civil cloth.
They come up to me thinking I am an event worker(a hat & a radio were a giveaway).
Conversation goes like this:
Them: What's going on here
Me: ummm Burning Man

Them: Whats is this?(pointing at the gate)
Me: The gate, where they check tickets.

Them: Where do you get tickets
Me: Nowhere right now(at this point I can barrely hold myself from busting out)

Them: We just wanted to take a look at the inside and go back to San Jose.
Me: Well, you'd have to buy a full price ticket, if you can find one.

Me: Did you guys bring any food or water (question about costumes didn't even come to mind)
Them: NO

Me: How did you find out about this place?
Them: Someone told us

Me: And he didn't tell you what to do/bring?
Them: No.

Then I sent them to will call sugesting to ask people for extra tickets.
I got back on the radio and told my crew the whole story. I could hear them loughing 10 cars away

No comment........

Gage · Post by **Gage** » Wed Sep 03, 2008 9:59 pm

oleg8888 wrote:Thursday, 1AM waiting for the gate to start functioning.
I grab a walkie-talkie and head to the front of the line to find out the holdup.
Minutes later my wife comes on radio saying there are 4 hindu looking guys wondering around heading my way.
Minutes later I see them.
Indeed, 4 hindu guys, wearing civil cloth.
They come up to me thinking I am an event worker(a hat & a radio were a giveaway).
Conversation goes like this:
Them: What's going on here
Me: ummm Burning Man

Them: Whats is this?(pointing at the gate)
Me: The gate, where they check tickets.

Them: Where do you get tickets
Me: Nowhere right now(at this point I can barrely hold myself from busting out)

Them: We just wanted to take a look at the inside and go back to San Jose.
Me: Well, you'd have to buy a full price ticket, if you can find one.

Me: Did you guys bring any food or water (question about costumes didn't even come to mind)
Them: NO

Me: How did you find out about this place?
Them: Someone told us

Me: And he didn't tell you what to do/bring?
Them: No.

Then I sent them to will call sugesting to ask people for extra tickets.
I got back on the radio and told my crew the whole story. I could hear them loughing 10 cars away

No comment........

Now THAT'S fucking classic... I'm still laughing!!

mars · Post by **mars** » Wed Sep 03, 2008 10:39 pm

Well that reminds me of this incident, which happened early in the week and I had completely forgotent about...

I was working at playa info and a guy came up asking for directions. I pulled out a map and said, okay, this dot here is The Man. He said, "What Man?". You know, THE Man! He says, "THE Man? I don't know what you mean." So I say, okay, let me start over...you are aware of where you are, correct? He says, "I'm at Burning Man". I say, "Did you know there is a man that is burned?" He says, "NO, I was not aware of that" I say, "Okay so this is burning man and there is a man that is burned and that man is where this dot is on the map....

oh, yes, i have many more playa info stories to tell...what a fun fun fun place to work!

Timezone LaFontaine · Post by **Timezone LaFontaine** » Thu Sep 04, 2008 10:48 am

Saturday afternoon, I started wandering around on the playa before the dust storm really kicked in for good. Eventually it got to the point where there would be a whiteout for several minutes, then a couple of minutes where it cleared up and I could see my way around a bit more. I wandered around in that kind of wait-a-while-then-move-on pattern for a few hours, then saw that it was generally getting worse and decided to begin heading back to Center Camp. So there I am, wandering around in the glowing void, near the Man but out of sight... I see something ahead of me and realize that it's a fully-made bed. At first I thought it was someone's art car parked there, but upon closer inspection I see that it's an installation with an array of shadow-casting stencils mounted a few feet over the mattress so that you can trace your own patterns onto fabric. Obviously there wasn't anyone there using it in the soft whiteout light, so I laid down to relax a while and enjoy the whiteout in style. I would kind of doze a bit, then wake up and still find myself in the glowing void, enjoying the wind. After about twenty minutes, I see this shape emerging in the distance. Turns out its a BRC Rangers pickup truck that very slowly pulls up alongside 'my' bed, and just waits there for several moments. I was wondering if maybe I was doing something wrong and they were going to ask me to move along. Finally the window rolls down and these two rangers are just grinning and looking at me. "You look like you feel good," one says. I'm all masked up and goggled up but I just laughed and flashed an OK, and they waved and drove on. It was a good afternoon.

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Thu Sep 04, 2008 11:15 am

carn1fex wrote:Though I've heard some far funnier ones, mine goes to my brother.. whom thursday night on a trek to bother women near Nexus i hear him say "Hey there.. you guys like led zeppelin?" I turn around to find that hes talking to a pile of well decorated bicycles. Wow hahaha im putting that quote on his grave.

Hey,
I can help with that, I make tombstones.............

Rusted Iron · Post by **Rusted Iron** » Thu Sep 04, 2008 6:43 pm

We parked our M.V. near the Esplanande, because of the white-out. While reclining in the back with a blanket, we watching people attempt to leave the city. RVs and trucks towing trailers passed us, heading out into the open playa. About a half hour later, they passed us again, heading back into the city. A few of them repeated this manuver two or three time--perhaps more, because I could only see them when the dust let up a bit.

mk-ultra · Post by **mk-ultra** » Thu Sep 04, 2008 9:31 pm

Does having some random LEO peddle into your camp and say, "hey, I heard I could buy some E off you guys" count as funny?

And, no, we weren't selling drugs. Anyone else treated to this sort of comedy?

DoriumLux · Post by **DoriumLux** » Thu Sep 04, 2008 9:34 pm

mk-ultra wrote:Does having some random LEO peddle into your camp and say, "hey, I heard I could buy some E off you guys" count as funny?

And, no, we weren't selling drugs. Anyone else treated to this sort of comedy?

Yeah, that's happened to me or my camp at least several times over the last few years. It's nothing to new.

Joshatdot · Post by **Joshatdot** » Thu Sep 04, 2008 11:50 pm

This is crazy & funny ... On Saturday in the middle of the dust storm, I was walking by camp "Got Stickers", I think it was, between 4:00 ~ 4:15 & A. Some dude wearing a dust mask...in the middle of the dust storm, was blowing the dust off the astro turf with a leaf blower.

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Fri Sep 05, 2008 9:31 am

a nude guy stopped by my "bucket 'O money" and was talking to me.
As he turned to leave, I noticed about 2' of T.P. hanging out his butt.......
it was hilarious..........all the screams and terms of disgust as he passed through the crowd........

He came back by about an hour later, still sportin' the tail......still gettin' the comments, especially from the young "ravers" in for the weekend........hahahaha

Rev_Sysyphus · Post by **Rev_Sysyphus** » Fri Sep 05, 2008 10:44 am

For me it was when the theme camp next to us was abandoned and these two gals with 2 guys (non-themers) took it over. Well they were trying to cover thier truck & U-Haul with a tarp for a shade structure in the Monday dust storm. I ran over to grab the tarp and helped with securing it. As a reward the leader gal (Roller - I know her mundane name but won't use it here) gave me something that led to a rather wonderful adventure of me wandering the deep playa the next evening grooving on the sky and the art installations.

Thank you once again Roller Girl!

vargaso · Post by **vargaso** » Fri Sep 05, 2008 12:41 pm

My wife was in a porta-potty where someone had placed one of those birthday cards that sings "Happy birthday" when you open it. So the whole time she's taking care of business, she's hearing "Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you..."

When she told me, I almost fell on the floor laughing.