KampCo.? SURE !!!

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Tue Sep 09, 2008 7:32 am

for all your playa needs...

KampCo. sure has a wide variety of items at discount prices...

This year we'll be featuring the Anita Bryant Tanning Booth because we all know a day without Orange Jews, is like a day without Sunshine.

wondering how to make all of those leftover bananas into something Drinkable?

put them in the Jew, Sir...

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Wed Sep 10, 2008 5:14 pm

What IS this, chopped LIVERS?

tighten your borscht belt, it's going to be a bumpy ride...

don't make me hit you with my whoopie schtick, and i aint talking Goldberg, because her shits just not funny.

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Fri Sep 12, 2008 5:47 am

I see, no one wants to touch this schmata with a ten foot polock...

how about some Chaiku...

Today I am a man.
Tomorrow I will return
To the seventh grade.

Lacking fins or tail
The gefilte fish swims with
Great difficulty.

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Sat Sep 13, 2008 9:35 am

everything will be illuminated on our most rigid of searches.

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Tue Dec 02, 2008 6:21 am

Bumpkus!

Yom Kippur -- Forgive
me, Lord, for the Mercedes
and all that lobster.

Our youngest daughter,
our most precious jewel.
Hence the name, Tiffany.

Today, mild shvitzing.
Tomorrow, so hot you'll plotz.
Five-day forecast: feh

Left the door open
for the Prophet Elijah.
Now the cat is gone.

Yenta. Shmeer. Gevaltput my
Shlemiel. Shlimazl. Tochis.
Oy! To be fluent

A lovely nose ring --
excuse me while I put my
head in the oven.

fciron · Post by **fciron** » Tue Dec 02, 2008 8:26 am

I'm still waiting for
an original Jew-ku
to appear here soon.

Sail Man · Post by **Sail Man** » Tue Dec 02, 2008 9:13 am

Oy Vai, you shlameil's!

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Wed Dec 03, 2008 6:01 am

how about these...

Paul Mitchell products
good for the goy
but not on Jew Fro.

matza matza everywhere
i have to wait
the butter is cold.

a bobby pin works
yarmulke secure
if not, try paste.

97' cadillac on I95
appears to be driverless
it's mrs. Nussbaum.

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Sun Dec 14, 2008 10:47 am

Jew-Ku, ripped from the Headlines....

fifty billion dollars?
where Bernard? How?
did you pay RETAIL?

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Fri Jan 09, 2009 10:47 am

Rockets like pouring rain
burst in little puddles
Over-react? Of course.

Bin Noddin · Post by **Bin Noddin** » Mon Feb 02, 2009 10:38 am

wreaking havoc in Gaza
since the days of Samson,
a shiksa's haircut
leads to all this.

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Mon Feb 02, 2009 1:42 pm

The goy will laugh
deep and full
when kosher bacon comes.

nexxtro9 · Post by **nexxtro9** » Thu May 14, 2009 1:27 am

seems like the burners
pass over this thread

SpacemanSpliff · Post by **SpacemanSpliff** » Thu May 14, 2009 5:56 am

[quote="Simon of the Playa"]Jew-Ku, ripped from the Headlines....

fifty billion dollars?
where Bernard? How?
did you pay RETAIL?[/quote]

I love it. But I feel the need to remind you of the syllable pattern that Haiku follow.

Monstrous blinky toy
Blown minds and speakers, but it
Was better last year.

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Thu May 14, 2009 6:41 am

do you think

reminding Simon, of anything, now or then

will at all matter?

SpacemanSpliff · Post by **SpacemanSpliff** » Thu May 14, 2009 6:53 am

Matter's subjective
Can't teach an old dog new tricks
Fuck syllable counts.

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Thu May 14, 2009 7:01 am

well, yes, but

with an old dog, and a pony

makes a great show

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Thu May 14, 2009 8:11 am

it's always numbers
why must we know all the time?
get an accountant...

(happy?)

oh boy, a new day!
it's benji netanyahu!
feh! so much for peace.