I'm finally going home

HeironymousJosch · Post by **HeironymousJosch** » Tue Mar 31, 2009 1:04 pm

My name is Heironymus Josch, you can call me Heiro for short or HJ, not to be confused with the HJ that involves a penis and somebody else's hand. I met OneEyedDick from BooBy bar here at ePlaya where I expressed interest in getting involved somewhere. I'm excited to stay with such a great camp and I look forward to seeing many of you get drunk at our fine establishment! This will be my first time going to Burning Man. I am not going because I heard there's naked chicks or because I've been told that it's a "dope party in the desert." I'm going because I'm meant to.

I was supposed to be getting married at the end of this summer, now I'm not. After nearly 3 years, we dissolved things, went our separate ways. By 'we' I mean she. We are both still madly in love; we all know how complicated these things can be. She was a go go dancer when I met her. I fell in love with her laughter, her smile, her legs and her fiery spirit. At the time, she was planning to go to burning man for the first time. We fell deeply in love as BM approached. Introduced to her group of friends, I was surrounded by long-time burners and all I heard about was their home in the Black Rock Desert. I was encouraged to go that year, 2006, but I couldn't get the time off of work. Instead I helped her and my new friends make costumes, create gifts and plan their trip.

Fast forward to the spring of 2007. From experiences she'd had while in BRC or out of ulterior motives, the truth I'll never know and choose not to, she was convinced that BRC was a bad place for couples. I didn't want to step on her toes and encouraged her to go without me, helping again to plan her trip. I even restored a 1920's JC Higgins bicycle for her to take. Those bikes are so neat, with a "tank" surrounding the top frame rail and a headlight housed in the front. I converted the useless incandescent setup to ultra-bright LED's that fit in the same housing. I was so honored when she said that she didn't even want to decorate it. She, the bike and her friends headed home for another week in Black Rock City. When she came back, things were different. She left me two weeks later. In October of that year she had a change of heart. Not long after, we moved in together.

2008 - As the summer passed, we celebrated our two year anniversary and she decided not to go to Burning Man. She blamed it on the theme but I knew she was terrified of what it might do to us. I was comforted by that. Out of respect for her space and independence, I never told her how much Iâ€™d always wanted to go. In retrospect, it would have been a great year for the two of us to test that theory about couples. Instead we went to San Diego. I knew she would be disappointed to miss the burn, so I planned a small vacation, spending money and time that could have, just as easily, been spent on a BM trip. We had a great time in San Diego, we had a great life together in Colorado and in December of 2008, two days before Christmas, she left me again. It really is complicated.

Despite this post being about her, my trip home this year is not. From the hundreds of nights spent lying next to each other talking, sharing secrets and dreams, I came to understand the power Burning Man had over people that made themselves open to it, a power strong enough to make them reconsider their lives outside of BRC and to act on those considerations. I came to understand that Burning Man wasn't any one thing or a collection of things but exactly what each citizen of BRC needs it to be if they're willing to be open, drop all expectations and simply be. I was reminded through our separation how impermanent the things I choose to define my life by really are. There is no mystery surrounding the impermanence of Burning Man, Black Rock City exists only one week a year on a single planet in a solitary solar system in a galaxy that's one of billions in the universe just like it. I canâ€™t think of a better environment to simply be.

Iâ€™ve wanted to come home for almost three years and in August, I finally will. I am humbled to have the opportunity and I am eternally grateful to those that make the city possible and its inhabitants that make it what it is.

Heironymus Josch

Isotopia · Post by **Isotopia** » Tue Mar 31, 2009 1:42 pm

Glad things worked out.

Remember though, when people refer to the event as 'coming home' more people are snickering than not.

Post by **Elderberry** » Tue Mar 31, 2009 1:58 pm

Hey there--welcome to eplaya.

JK

HeironymousJosch · Post by **HeironymousJosch** » Tue Mar 31, 2009 2:23 pm

Isotopia wrote:Glad things worked out.

Remember though, when people refer to the event as 'coming home' more people are snickering than not.

Thanks and let them snicker.

oneeyeddick · Post by **oneeyeddick** » Tue Mar 31, 2009 8:06 pm

That's the attitude....fuck em !!

Let the bastards snicker........

those that are actually laughing don't have a home to come home to in the first place.

Sensei · Post by **Sensei** » Tue Mar 31, 2009 10:18 pm

oneeyeddick wrote:those that are actually laughing don't have a home to come home to in the first place.

Uh, sure...

Karma · Post by **Karma** » Tue Mar 31, 2009 11:44 pm

HJ, your lucky in the sense that you didnt come out with your ex. I think it would've been a bummer.
Coming out of your own accord with a new group of ppl for your first time sounds like the ticket.

I dont know about the whole connecting on a different plane thing that alot of ppl expect when they come to brc. For me it's just a great way to hang with my friends, relax and meet different types of ppl that you never would've interacted with in r/l.
But everyone takes something diff out of it, and you'll get an experiance unique to you. That's what counts.
Have Fun !

Oh, and I agree with Sensei (as usual) ..... Huh ?

oneeyeddick · Post by **oneeyeddick** » Wed Apr 01, 2009 12:47 am

Sensei wrote:
oneeyeddick wrote:those that are actually laughing don't have a home to come home to in the first place.
Uh, sure...

As in ...they don't get it and they don't feel it......read between the lines GC.

I actually feel sorry for them.

This guy is already heading home, and he's never been there yet.....impressive.

Just don't get all gooey on me when you show up in camp, Josch, you don't wanna be mistaken as someone having drama issues.

You might get soaked with the anti- bullshit spray that Piney brings.

.............and it tastes funny.

HeironymousJosch · Post by **HeironymousJosch** » Thu Apr 02, 2009 7:06 pm

Karma wrote:HJ, your lucky in the sense that you didnt come out with your ex. I think it would've been a bummer.
Coming out of your own accord with a new group of ppl for your first time sounds like the ticket.

I dont know about the whole connecting on a different plane thing that alot of ppl expect when they come to brc. For me it's just a great way to hang with my friends, relax and meet different types of ppl that you never would've interacted with in r/l.
But everyone takes something diff out of it, and you'll get an experiance unique to you. That's what counts.
Have Fun !

Oh, and I agree with Sensei (as usual) ..... Huh ?

Karma, thanks for the feedback. I certainly don't expect to connect on a different plane but I have seen that happen with my friends. I'm just going to go and commit to hard work and having a damn good time. I'm excited to meet new people, which I need more now than ever.

HJ

HeironymousJosch · Post by **HeironymousJosch** » Thu Apr 02, 2009 7:11 pm

oneeyeddick wrote:
Sensei wrote:
oneeyeddick wrote:those that are actually laughing don't have a home to come home to in the first place.
Uh, sure...
As in ...they don't get it and they don't feel it......read between the lines GC.

I actually feel sorry for them.

This guy is already heading home, and he's never been there yet.....impressive.

Just don't get all gooey on me when you show up in camp, Josch, you don't wanna be mistaken as someone having drama issues.

You might get soaked with the anti- bullshit spray that Piney brings.

.............and it tastes funny.

Don't make me repeat the "carved from Rocky Mountain Granite" shpeal. Granite isn't gooey and it certainly doesn't bring drama unless it breaks loose and falls in the road. I'm sticking with this metaphor.

oneeyeddick · Post by **oneeyeddick** » Thu Apr 02, 2009 10:07 pm

All rocks eventually grind down to dust, and dust gets all gooey when wet.

Don't step in the wet spots on the playa.

Connecting on a different plane means layovers, and nobody wants that..... except Sensei, that way he can go find some frozen yogurt to lick on.

chiefdanfox · Post by **chiefdanfox** » Thu Apr 02, 2009 11:04 pm

oneeyeddick wrote:All rocks eventually grind down to dust, and dust gets all gooey when wet.

Don't step in the wet spots on the playa.

Connecting on a different plane means layovers, and nobody wants that..... except Sensei, that way he can go find some frozen yogurt to lick on.

Not all rocks grind down to dust. On this planet, sand is the smallest grain possible from natural grinding. To get to dust, you need weather and volcanoes. On this planet. And Mars. The moon has dust from a few billion years of impact events. FYI.

oneeyeddick · Post by **oneeyeddick** » Thu Apr 02, 2009 11:11 pm

Grind as a verb works just fine as I used it, and thanks for the FYI, I feel so smarter now, and by the way, there are several minerals that grind down to grains much smaller than sand, like Gypsum... FYI back atcha.

Sensei · Post by **Sensei** » Fri Apr 03, 2009 1:21 am

Careful, CDF. If you get the Dick angry he'll follow you around all over the board and try to lick your yogurt.

oneeyeddick · Post by **oneeyeddick** » Fri Apr 03, 2009 9:00 am

Your yogurt was better last year, Sensei.

HeironymousJosch · Post by **HeironymousJosch** » Fri Apr 03, 2009 5:50 pm

oneeyeddick wrote: Connecting on a different plane means layovers, and nobody wants that..... on.

punny

HeironymousJosch · Post by **HeironymousJosch** » Fri Apr 03, 2009 5:51 pm

chiefdanfox wrote:
oneeyeddick wrote:All rocks eventually grind down to dust, and dust gets all gooey when wet.

Don't step in the wet spots on the playa.

Connecting on a different plane means layovers, and nobody wants that..... except Sensei, that way he can go find some frozen yogurt to lick on.
Not all rocks grind down to dust. On this planet, sand is the smallest grain possible from natural grinding. To get to dust, you need weather and volcanoes. On this planet. And Mars. The moon has dust from a few billion years of impact events. FYI.

That, OED, is the definition of "schooled." Thanks for the incite chiefdan! So, at worst I can be wet sand, hardly gooey.

HeironymousJosch · Post by **HeironymousJosch** » Fri Apr 03, 2009 5:55 pm

oneeyeddick wrote:Grind as a verb works just fine as I used it, and thanks for the FYI, I feel so smarter now, and by the way, there are several minerals that grind down to grains much smaller than sand, like Gypsum... FYI back atcha.

I'm not a big fan of gypsum. I've hung many a sheet of drywall in my day and every time I do, I end up with gypsum powder in my eyes, ears and anus. Nothing, besides maybe being burned, sucks worse than being chapped from head to toe.

Post by **Sham** » Fri Apr 03, 2009 6:02 pm

HeironymousJosch wrote: I end up with gypsum powder in my eyes, ears and anus.

I hate to jump in here and ask the question, but please tell all those inquiring minds in cyberland how you get gypsum dust up your butt hole. I think many people could benefit from this info!

HeironymousJosch · Post by **HeironymousJosch** » Fri Apr 03, 2009 10:17 pm

Shambala wrote:
HeironymousJosch wrote: I end up with gypsum powder in my eyes, ears and anus.
I hate to jump in here and ask the question, but please tell all those inquiring minds in cyberland how you get gypsum dust up your butt hole. I think many people could benefit from this info!

Gypsum powder, second only to talc as the worlds softest mineral, forms an extremely pervasive powder. Think of what you put on your chapped b-hole or a babies rash butt - talc. Why not gypsum despite it being almost as powdery? It's fucking chappy. Luckily I have a shweaty layer that usually prevents actual gypsum to butthole contact but the pervasiveness of this powder cannot and must not be underestimated.

HeironymousJosch · Post by **HeironymousJosch** » Fri Apr 03, 2009 10:24 pm

This is gypsum under a microscope. This should help illustrate the "chappiness"

And this is talcum powder under a microscope

Which would you rather have on your b-hole.

oneeyeddick · Post by **oneeyeddick** » Fri Apr 03, 2009 11:41 pm

OOps double post.

oneeyeddick · Post by **oneeyeddick** » Fri Apr 03, 2009 11:50 pm

Kinda wierd how the assrash commonly known as "monkeybutt" that I sometimes get from
walking around at BRC is partially caused the Gypsum dust in the Playa, and the cure is Talcum powder ,
which feels all cool and velvety on my irritated posterior perimeter.

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Sat Apr 04, 2009 8:51 am

what about Rim-Job camp?

dont they offer a service for MB?

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Sat Apr 04, 2009 9:07 am

Don't you remember? They were absorbed into Rim-Shot Camp a couple of years back. Now all they do is tell annoying bad jokes.

oneeyeddick · Post by **oneeyeddick** » Sat Apr 04, 2009 10:43 am

Ba-dum-bum-ching.

Ugly Dougly · Post by **Ugly Dougly** » Sat Apr 04, 2009 1:23 pm

Simon of the Playa · Post by **Simon of the Playa** » Sat Apr 04, 2009 6:05 pm

they're now part of the Borscht Belt Burners.

Grossinger's Village.

the smorgasboard is to die for.

Post by **Sham** » Sat Apr 04, 2009 6:36 pm

Simon of the Playa wrote:they're now part of the Borscht Belt Burners.

Grossinger's Village.

the smorgasboard is to die for.

Simon, I like you more and more with every post!

PavementBlues · Post by **PavementBlues** » Tue Apr 07, 2009 10:07 am

HeironymousJosch wrote:This is gypsum under a microscope. This should help illustrate the "chappiness"

Dear God Jesus, that looks horrifying. I think I'll make a mental note to avoid gypsum dust baths, however tempting they might be.

And yeah, I agree with Karma on the bringing an ex thing. I did that my first year with someone who I had been with for two years, and it definitely made for numerous bummers throughout the whole event. It worked out, though, because by the end of the week I had finally gotten shit straightened out in my head and things have been going nowhere but up since.