I need to know about C O W S and R U G S

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Fri Mar 26, 2004 4:01 pm

Is it true that they are going to open up a Concentrated Animal Feeding Operation and capture the methane emmissions as part of a power plant?

Is it true that BLM staffers have an office pool going to see who keels over in an apoplexy first--AA2 or BRR?

Is it true that they discovered the bones of Cleopatra wrapped in a discarded carpet end after the event last year?

Chai Guy · Post by **Chai Guy** » Fri Mar 26, 2004 4:06 pm

Seriously though, be careful of those cows on 447, you really don't want to hit one.

Cow Vs. VW bus at approximately 20 mph

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Fri Mar 26, 2004 4:14 pm

Well, it's been on my list of things to swerve and avoid.

headquarters · Post by **headquarters** » Fri Mar 26, 2004 4:21 pm

when we were leaving in 2002, (we head back to seattle via Alturas) we were only an hour away from BM and we saw something off to the right of our really crappy chevy conversion van. maybe a jack rabbit. when we turned our heads back we *JUST* missed a HUGE cow that had just left the road. THAT was scary.. those cows will put the hurt on you buddy.. BE CAREFUL OUT THERE EVERYONE!!

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Fri Mar 26, 2004 4:23 pm

I also suspect that after they've been hit but haven't been taken away yet (you know, that bloated, stiff-legged state) you don't want to stop for fear of smell.

Or is that just a rumor?

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Fri Mar 26, 2004 4:25 pm

Actually, Chai, that VW is nothing. My grandmother totaled a big late 40's american sedan in against a "nobody's been hunting me because they were having a war" boar. Of course that was at Autobahn speed.

She didn't take pictures though. No care for the family legacy.

juanicoheal · Post by **juanicoheal** » Fri Mar 26, 2004 4:45 pm

theCryptofishist wrote:Is it true that they are going to open up a Concentrated Animal Feeding Operation and capture the methane emmissions as part of a power plant?

AP – Black Rock City – March 2004

Ranchers in the outlying areas of the Black Rock Desert have been rallying against the coal-fired power plant proposed for the area. “Our efforts to stop construction have yet to be effective,” Black Rock Ranchers association spokesperson Richard Allan III told reporters today, “We will now be submitting a proposal to Sempra for an alternative power source.”

The BRRA proposal, as submitted to Sempra, and the Washoe County Planning Commission includes construction of a geodesic dome one mile in diameter, covered in silver mylar. The apex of the dome, would house a methane collection unit. Inside the dome cattle would be fed a diet of 50% soy and 50% kidney beans. Each herd would be housed in the dome for 1 week at a time, at which time they would be moved to outlaying rangelands to air out.

Neither Sempra, nor WCPC was available for comment.

III · Post by **III** » Fri Mar 26, 2004 6:12 pm

>swerve and avoid.

i've seen just as many (if not more) bad accidents from people trying to miss rabbits and things as from direct impact with cows. (and i've seen a fair number of cow wrecks up there). the only real answer is to slow down a whole bunch when coming over those blind hills, or going around a corner. if you've got to swerve to miss a cow, you're in trouble already. if you swerve to miss a rabbit, you'll end up below them on the food chain.

Bob · Post by **Bob** » Sat Mar 27, 2004 7:29 am

Rabbits on Rte 34... no problem... just don't swerve...

Five-point bucks... no problem... aftermarket fenders are cheap enough...

Cows... if you can't afford to pay the rancher, or can't butcher one on the spot w/a chainsaw, don't aim to maim or kill...

Morons trying to pass on the BRC exit road in a rainstorm while you're going back in have to be the worst, all in all...

Zephryus · Post by **Zephryus** » Sat Mar 27, 2004 8:17 am

You fools! Don't you know that these boards are open to anyone? I, for one, unequivocably denounce automobile induced slaugher of innocent critters on public lands, and if you know what's good for you, you'll do the same. This "Cryptofishist" is clearly a paper tiger, here to wreak havoc on our community and expose our collective soft, fuzzy underbelly to the slavering hordes of PETA members who surely circle this board, waiting for their chance to strike.
[Note to slavering PETA hordes: please don't hurt me.]

Last Real Burner · Post by **Last Real Burner** » Sat Mar 27, 2004 10:44 am

Awww Fuck 'em...

shhhhhly,
mr smith

rodent · Post by **rodent** » Sat Mar 27, 2004 3:00 pm

anyone mind if I crosspost my sick carnivor art idea from tribe.net 's bman tribe?

---
rodent (putting the eek in geek)

robotland · Post by **robotland** » Mon Mar 29, 2004 5:42 am

...Many years ago, my Pops and I were driving home late at night on a very dark country road, in a 70's Volvo wagon- Suddenly we STOPPED DEAD in the road! We got out, noticing that the front end was all pushed in , but saw NOTHING. The road was lined with deep ravines, which we also searched, again finding NOTHING. After a number of calls to neighbors the following day, Dad finally contacted the farmer whose black cow we had hit- the cow had wandered through a break in the fence and into the road, gotten hit, wandered down into and back up out the other side of the ravine and finally realized that its neck was broken, at which point it dropped dead.

Zephryus · Post by **Zephryus** » Mon Mar 29, 2004 5:50 am

Hell, that's nothin'. I have a friend who once had an encounter with the wily Coastal Californian Federal Mailbox. He claims it was playing chicken with him. Dented the hell out of his oldsmobile but he showed it what-for.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Mon Mar 29, 2004 8:41 am

Thanks Juanicoheal. I knew someone on this board could dig out the truth!

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Mon Mar 29, 2004 8:44 am

Zephryus wrote: This "Cryptofishist" is clearly a paper tiger,

Skooooozi! Just because I've got a fishy secret agenda doesn't mean I'm a paper anything. I have to tell you, "Swimming While Paper" leaves you a pulpy mess!

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Thu Apr 01, 2004 3:54 pm

You've been very helpful with the C O W S (thank you very much) but so far, not much on R U G S.

Question: Is is alright to use a Burn Platform to dispose of my Dupont Stain Master? Or should I just carry it to the trash fence and throw it over to the other side?

unjonharley · Post by **unjonharley** » Thu Apr 01, 2004 4:02 pm

theCryptofishist wrote:You've been very helpful with the C O W S (thank you very much) but so far, not much on R U G S.

Question: Is is alright to use a Burn Platform to dispose of my Dupont Stain Master? Or should I just carry it to the trash fence and throw it over to the other side?

/
That cow rug is plastic. You get to take it home with you. Reminder: It is against the law to remove any part of national land. So hide the "dust" ridden crap well.

III · Post by **III** » Thu Apr 01, 2004 5:01 pm

>>Question

either of those should be fine, or you can just leave it on the ground with a note for the dpw, letting them know that it's a gift that they can use to enhance their post burn playa living experience

juanicoheal · Post by **juanicoheal** » Thu Apr 01, 2004 5:04 pm

theCryptofishist wrote:Question:

On Saturday afternoon, attach a good length of heavy chain to two corners. Pull the bastard carpet out to the man, chanting "Larry is God, krishna krishna" the whole way. Then ask the assistance of all the people who have started following you to clothe that big wooden naked dude with his own stainless royal cloak.

It'll get burnt in the end, and you didn't do it!

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Wed May 12, 2004 4:03 pm

Holsteins--the black and white cow that is just about the Platonic dairy C O W produces the most milk. Jerseys (or perhaps Guernseys--it's hard to tell the Channel Islands apart) have the highest percentage of cream in thier milk. I've spent decades wondering if this meant that they both produce the exact same amount of cream, but the Holstein's was more "watered down" as it were. Or does the Jersey produce more cream than the Black and White stalwart? Is there a chart of milk and cream production distribution among C O W S that resembles that "normal distribution" star chart? Is there an ideal C O W that produces the "creamiest milk"? Or, like most things in life, do you have to prioritize and make choices?

Last Real Burner · Post by **Last Real Burner** » Wed May 12, 2004 4:39 pm

A woman is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A man is driving down the same road. As they pass each other, the man leans out of the window and yells "COW!!"

The woman immediately leans out of her window and replies, "FAG!!"
They each continue on their way, and as the woman rounds the next corner, she crashes into a cow in the middle of the road. If only women would listen.

"Many receive advice, only the wise profit by it."

surreally,
mr smith

Captain Goddammit · Post by **Captain Goddammit** » Wed May 12, 2004 8:33 pm

If you want to know about R U G S just go see Amir at Going Out Of Business Oriental Rugs. There's a location near you.

Ranger Genius · Post by **Ranger Genius** » Thu May 13, 2004 8:38 am

Yeah, if I'm not careful I spend my entire paycheck at GOOBOR. And every single location is run by a guy named Amir. I think they're contractually bound to change their names, even if they're whitebred middle-western types.

Oldguy · Post by **Oldguy** » Wed Jul 30, 2014 10:17 pm

bump::: I wonder if Amir is still around.

P.S. GOOBOR I just got it, HA !

Post by **Eric** » Thu Jul 31, 2014 12:25 am

Since this has been bumped back to life after a decade slumbering, I'll move it to the correct forum (Open Discussion).

I need to know about C O W S and R U G S

I need to know about C O W S and R U G S

In the famous words of Alfafa...

One of the things I need to know about C O W S is . . .

BITCH!!!....

Re: I need to know about C O W S and R U G S

Re: I need to know about C O W S and R U G S