Ok, you're a creative bunch, I need your suggestions on how to fuck with the timeshare presentation people. They've already screwed us by giving us a one bedroom suite instead of the two-bedroom we asked for, so they deserve whatever they get...
Some ideas that spring to mind;
Baby talk.
Talking REALLY LOUDLY. (my voice is as loud as other's shouts if I make it that way.)
Mocking absolutely everything in the place.
Going all Hannibal Lector on their ass... "So what happened to you that you couldn't get a better job than trying to sell timeshares...?"
FUN WAYS TO FUCK WITH TIMESHARE PRESENTATION PEOPLE?
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DVD Burner
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RingO'Fire
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OK, maybe I've just got this stuff on my brain because of what I'm writing in the "Youthful Indiscretions" thread next door, but here's one idea.
You need to dress up in some outrageous sexually suggestive costume, like full-on drag or BD/SM gear, perhaps with a dog collar and leash, or perhaps with a strap-on actually strapped on. Perhaps you could do the Jackass Party Boy thing and go into their office in your leopard skin butt floss thong.
Then go into their office to talk to them dressed in your garb, but it is absolutely essential that you act as if everything else is completely normal. However outrageously you're dressed, just act as if people run around dressed like that all the time, you just had something to discuss with them concerning the condo. Just think of it as if you're an actor in a play, playing your part.
Or, maybe eat something that gives you massive farts (like beans, or sour cream some kind of gooey cheese or a glass of milk if you're lactose intolerant) . Then, when you go into their office, just let 'em rip, right out in front of God and everybody. That would be another good way to fuck with them. I'm just not sure if the gas cramps would be worth it.
Here's another one. How about if you go into their office carrying a glass or coke bottle of something you're "drinking" (i.e., pretending to drink). This "something" you're drinking should have a rank, nasty smell to it. I can't think of any specific stinky thing at the moment. You could claim it was some exotic "herbal tea" that your acupuncturist prescribed for your health. During the course of your discussion, you set down your glass of "tea." Then, like a bumbling buffoon, you "accidentally" knock over the glass. You apologize profusely, but leave them with a office that reeks of whatever it was you spilled.
If you're lactose intolerant (like me)
You need to dress up in some outrageous sexually suggestive costume, like full-on drag or BD/SM gear, perhaps with a dog collar and leash, or perhaps with a strap-on actually strapped on. Perhaps you could do the Jackass Party Boy thing and go into their office in your leopard skin butt floss thong.
Then go into their office to talk to them dressed in your garb, but it is absolutely essential that you act as if everything else is completely normal. However outrageously you're dressed, just act as if people run around dressed like that all the time, you just had something to discuss with them concerning the condo. Just think of it as if you're an actor in a play, playing your part.
Or, maybe eat something that gives you massive farts (like beans, or sour cream some kind of gooey cheese or a glass of milk if you're lactose intolerant) . Then, when you go into their office, just let 'em rip, right out in front of God and everybody. That would be another good way to fuck with them. I'm just not sure if the gas cramps would be worth it.
Here's another one. How about if you go into their office carrying a glass or coke bottle of something you're "drinking" (i.e., pretending to drink). This "something" you're drinking should have a rank, nasty smell to it. I can't think of any specific stinky thing at the moment. You could claim it was some exotic "herbal tea" that your acupuncturist prescribed for your health. During the course of your discussion, you set down your glass of "tea." Then, like a bumbling buffoon, you "accidentally" knock over the glass. You apologize profusely, but leave them with a office that reeks of whatever it was you spilled.
If you're lactose intolerant (like me)
...but it seemed like such a good idea at the time...
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AntiM
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Which set of timeshare people? The ones who pitch the sale are different from the ones who make the reservations, and the folk who actually work as staff at the resort are another sub-set of employee. Not that I'm sticking up for the timeshare people, it just seems a bit cruel to exact revenge on the incorrect target. Mocking everything in the place is over-done, you need a grand, visual gesture, but nothing that causes chargeable property damage. I do like the bondage gear suggestion, every person needs a jolt away from the mundane now and again. I'll consult my Hayduking guides for ideas, there's some hilarious (for entertainment purposes only) shit in them.
Um, yeah, I'll be staying at a timeshare in Reno after Burning Man, if I can get a reservation for just one night. Sigh. I feel, so, so, middle class. Wonder what the desk staff will make of a group of five dusty burners in their lobby and a big-ass trailer in their lot. Probably be nice as pie because I have plastic.
Smiling Politely,
Anti m
Um, yeah, I'll be staying at a timeshare in Reno after Burning Man, if I can get a reservation for just one night. Sigh. I feel, so, so, middle class. Wonder what the desk staff will make of a group of five dusty burners in their lobby and a big-ass trailer in their lot. Probably be nice as pie because I have plastic.
Smiling Politely,
Anti m
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dragonfly Jafe
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RingO'Fire wrote:Here's another one. How about if you go into their office carrying a glass or coke bottle of something you're "drinking" (i.e., pretending to drink). This "something" you're drinking should have a rank, nasty smell to it. I can't think of any specific stinky thing at the moment.
<snip> there's little else that creates a special ambiance like butyric acid <snip>
You could claim it was some exotic "herbal tea" that your acupuncturist prescribed for your health. During the course of your discussion, you set down your glass of "tea." Then, like a bumbling buffoon, you "accidentally" knock over the glass. You apologize profusely, but leave them with a office that reeks of whatever it was you spilled.
If you're lactose intolerant (like me)
Force, I don't know if you've sat through timeshare pitches before, but I've had friends do it, and they all say that timeshare salesmen are the most emotionally manipulative sons of bitches in existence, surpassing every stripe of car salesman. My friends tell me that it takes a nearly psychopathic resistance to allowing your buttons to be pushed to get through those pitches. Good luck.
That said, I recommend that you walk in there and act like a Dadaist on crack.
-Give the presenters diminutive nicknames, like "Squidge". Refuse to refer to them as anything else.
-Agree with everything they say. When they give you forms, doodle on them as a five year old would. Make stick figure comics on the dotted lines. Act real proud of your artistic creations.
-At some point, they will accuse you of having walked in with no intention of buying into the timeshare. They will say this in a way that effectively suggests you are a liar, a cheat, a thief, a cheapskate, a barbarian, and generally the lowest form of life. The most effective way to deal with this, I'm told, is to shrug, smile, and freely admit to having come for the promised freebies. I would suggest that you also make yourself out to be an even worse human being than they suggest. Think up some really horrible images and share them.
-Do preposterously strange things during the pitch. Take off your shoes and try real hard to lick your toes (bonus points in you can make it). Begin masturbating vigorously with a non-genitalia body part like your kneecap (don't forget to moan and climax). Bring a beard trimmer and shave your face, head and/or armpits; this has the added benefit of being both noisy and messy.
-Bring a gameboy. Set the volume to max.
-Pretend not to know the simplest of terms. Interrupt the presenters frequently to ask for definitions.
-Hit on the presenters lecherously and relentlessly.
-If any of the presenters looks at you, stare intently at their mouth. This will likely have the effect of making them self conscious about what they are saying.
These suggestions may strike you as being terribly disrespectful. They are. From what I've heard, timeshare salesmen are trained to ignore all bounds of common decency when making the hard sell. Give 'em a little of their own medicine.
That said, I recommend that you walk in there and act like a Dadaist on crack.
-Give the presenters diminutive nicknames, like "Squidge". Refuse to refer to them as anything else.
-Agree with everything they say. When they give you forms, doodle on them as a five year old would. Make stick figure comics on the dotted lines. Act real proud of your artistic creations.
-At some point, they will accuse you of having walked in with no intention of buying into the timeshare. They will say this in a way that effectively suggests you are a liar, a cheat, a thief, a cheapskate, a barbarian, and generally the lowest form of life. The most effective way to deal with this, I'm told, is to shrug, smile, and freely admit to having come for the promised freebies. I would suggest that you also make yourself out to be an even worse human being than they suggest. Think up some really horrible images and share them.
-Do preposterously strange things during the pitch. Take off your shoes and try real hard to lick your toes (bonus points in you can make it). Begin masturbating vigorously with a non-genitalia body part like your kneecap (don't forget to moan and climax). Bring a beard trimmer and shave your face, head and/or armpits; this has the added benefit of being both noisy and messy.
-Bring a gameboy. Set the volume to max.
-Pretend not to know the simplest of terms. Interrupt the presenters frequently to ask for definitions.
-Hit on the presenters lecherously and relentlessly.
-If any of the presenters looks at you, stare intently at their mouth. This will likely have the effect of making them self conscious about what they are saying.
These suggestions may strike you as being terribly disrespectful. They are. From what I've heard, timeshare salesmen are trained to ignore all bounds of common decency when making the hard sell. Give 'em a little of their own medicine.
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Rob the Wop
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sparkletarte
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time share
So, why are you trying to give the time share people a hard time? If you don't like them or what they do, don't do the time share thing. By participating you are giving them permission to keep doing what they are doing. Instead, why not support a business or people who are doing something more positive?
Hmmm.... How about going in pretending that you are a serial killer, and need a base away from home from which to operate, and then add the layer that you are very bad a covering up your activities? Constantly drop hints that you are performing an illegal activity from the timeshare, and need to be assured that no one will investigate you? Ask about the policies regarding "modifiying" the unit, and about "excavating" in the basement. Cover the windows with opaque material. Bring in industrial strength saws and mysterious barrels. 
(Okay, I have a friend who is "into" serial killers...)
(Okay, I have a friend who is "into" serial killers...)
"Nothing is withheld from us which we have conceived to do.
Do things that have never been done."
--Russell Kirsch
Do things that have never been done."
--Russell Kirsch
Why am I fucking with the time share people? Because;
a) they didn't disclose that they're a timeshare until after booking the room. The "tour" (which I took to mean tour in the way that most normal human beings use the word- silly me) I took to mean a tour of vegas (this is in vegas btw, so while I appreciate the creativeness of the bondage gear suggestions, I'm sure they'd only be entertained by that, which is not what I'm after.) which I would be free to take advantage of or not. Not so. The "tour" is actually a 90 minute sales pitch.
b) the alcoholic who booked it straight lied to me and my fiance- (she's philipino and very demure) I talked to him to make it absolutely clear we wanted a 2 bedroom suite, then had him call my fiance to book the reservation since I was at work and short on time (he asked me to call her and tell her he was calling so she would know who he was), who he promptly lied to and told there were no 2 bedroom suites available, so we'd have to pay for a more expensive 1 bedroom. When I talked to her, she said she told him we wanted a 2 bedroom, which he ignored and booked a 1 bedroom, then when she asked him several times about getting a 2 bedroom, he said that a 1 bedroom was what he and I agreed upon (total lie). When I called him to find out what happened, he said she NEVER mentioned a 2 bedroom at all. He said he "didn't understand" when he talked to me that I wanted a 2 bedroom. Seeing the futility of arguing with this moron/psychotic/brain damage case, I told him we want what we asked for, and to make it happen or we would just cancel this and he'd get nothing.
c) I talked to the "customer service department" this morning, who agreed to change the reservation to a 2 bedroom, but still have yet to receive a confirmation of the change.
d) Their confirmation is worded such that if we cancel, they basically get to keep the money. If we don't attend their "tour" (sales pitch) they charge the credit card an extra $250.
e) I'm going to Vegas to get married, and I really don't need to be dealing with this crap. It pisses me off even more that someone took advantage of my girl's good and trusting nature.
f) I'm worried that now we'll get there and be presented with a 1 bedroom suite or even no room in light of their lack of professionalism thus far.
Zephyrus, I like your suggestions, in fact, they're very much along the lines of what I'm thinking... we must meet someday and compare idiosincrasies... being overtly obnoxious might be bad in that it would tip them off that I have no intentions of ever buying into this, which could result in horrible service for the rest of our stay.... whereas acting absolutely INSANE (which I can do, no problem) sounds like the hot ticket. I might even be able to make it work for me, demanding things like having the pool filled with cottage cheese as a condition of me signing the dotted line...
I'm thinking that interrupting CONSTANTLY would be a very effective tactic too... that drives me absolutely bugfuck when people do it to me... I love the serial killer angle... I'll report back to y'all on how it goes.
Thanks for all your creativeness and help!
a) they didn't disclose that they're a timeshare until after booking the room. The "tour" (which I took to mean tour in the way that most normal human beings use the word- silly me) I took to mean a tour of vegas (this is in vegas btw, so while I appreciate the creativeness of the bondage gear suggestions, I'm sure they'd only be entertained by that, which is not what I'm after.) which I would be free to take advantage of or not. Not so. The "tour" is actually a 90 minute sales pitch.
b) the alcoholic who booked it straight lied to me and my fiance- (she's philipino and very demure) I talked to him to make it absolutely clear we wanted a 2 bedroom suite, then had him call my fiance to book the reservation since I was at work and short on time (he asked me to call her and tell her he was calling so she would know who he was), who he promptly lied to and told there were no 2 bedroom suites available, so we'd have to pay for a more expensive 1 bedroom. When I talked to her, she said she told him we wanted a 2 bedroom, which he ignored and booked a 1 bedroom, then when she asked him several times about getting a 2 bedroom, he said that a 1 bedroom was what he and I agreed upon (total lie). When I called him to find out what happened, he said she NEVER mentioned a 2 bedroom at all. He said he "didn't understand" when he talked to me that I wanted a 2 bedroom. Seeing the futility of arguing with this moron/psychotic/brain damage case, I told him we want what we asked for, and to make it happen or we would just cancel this and he'd get nothing.
c) I talked to the "customer service department" this morning, who agreed to change the reservation to a 2 bedroom, but still have yet to receive a confirmation of the change.
d) Their confirmation is worded such that if we cancel, they basically get to keep the money. If we don't attend their "tour" (sales pitch) they charge the credit card an extra $250.
e) I'm going to Vegas to get married, and I really don't need to be dealing with this crap. It pisses me off even more that someone took advantage of my girl's good and trusting nature.
f) I'm worried that now we'll get there and be presented with a 1 bedroom suite or even no room in light of their lack of professionalism thus far.
Zephyrus, I like your suggestions, in fact, they're very much along the lines of what I'm thinking... we must meet someday and compare idiosincrasies... being overtly obnoxious might be bad in that it would tip them off that I have no intentions of ever buying into this, which could result in horrible service for the rest of our stay.... whereas acting absolutely INSANE (which I can do, no problem) sounds like the hot ticket. I might even be able to make it work for me, demanding things like having the pool filled with cottage cheese as a condition of me signing the dotted line...
I'm thinking that interrupting CONSTANTLY would be a very effective tactic too... that drives me absolutely bugfuck when people do it to me... I love the serial killer angle... I'll report back to y'all on how it goes.
Thanks for all your creativeness and help!
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AntiM
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Congratulations on the marriage, I think Vegas is a most excellent place to get hitched.
Too bad you can't get at the evil salesman directly. Go to the presentation drunk, but not too obviously so or they can't legally let you in, or after ingesting too much cough syrup, the type with a little ipeca in it (do they still make that stuff?) Then puke all over the carpet in the middle of the slide show. Find a piece of dead roach in whatever beverage/refreshment they offer to you and scream your head off. Pick your nose and eat it. Hit on other guys' wives, hit on other guys. Make sure your fiance is on board with this!
Or, once you're with your individual rep, ask the same questions over and over and over. Get him to explain every single little detail in a dozen different ways. Get them to disclose every last fee and charge, and ask them to figure out how much interest you'd be paying in hard cash if you finance through them. This really annoys them. Then announce you can buy their product at a better price on ebay. (This is actually true and scares the hell out of them, no commisson.) Be the last one out, holding up the next cattle call. Or, ask for a military discount, we had one set of reps bending over backwards for us with discounts and favors because it was memorial day and we actually are vets, we even got the papers on the table and then backed out. These guys were dying, watching their commission fly out the window, and we still got our free goodies. You have to have fun at these things!
The "land in Colorado" pitch in Vegas was the slimiest, don't fall for the free $50 in gaming chips pitch, although I did get drunk as hell on free booze because I was at a blackjack table the next day. I got insulting wit this bunch, they were obnoxious and actually bussed us to a conference center and held us hostage until the next bus came along, eeek!
Best wishes!
Anti m
Too bad you can't get at the evil salesman directly. Go to the presentation drunk, but not too obviously so or they can't legally let you in, or after ingesting too much cough syrup, the type with a little ipeca in it (do they still make that stuff?) Then puke all over the carpet in the middle of the slide show. Find a piece of dead roach in whatever beverage/refreshment they offer to you and scream your head off. Pick your nose and eat it. Hit on other guys' wives, hit on other guys. Make sure your fiance is on board with this!
Or, once you're with your individual rep, ask the same questions over and over and over. Get him to explain every single little detail in a dozen different ways. Get them to disclose every last fee and charge, and ask them to figure out how much interest you'd be paying in hard cash if you finance through them. This really annoys them. Then announce you can buy their product at a better price on ebay. (This is actually true and scares the hell out of them, no commisson.) Be the last one out, holding up the next cattle call. Or, ask for a military discount, we had one set of reps bending over backwards for us with discounts and favors because it was memorial day and we actually are vets, we even got the papers on the table and then backed out. These guys were dying, watching their commission fly out the window, and we still got our free goodies. You have to have fun at these things!
The "land in Colorado" pitch in Vegas was the slimiest, don't fall for the free $50 in gaming chips pitch, although I did get drunk as hell on free booze because I was at a blackjack table the next day. I got insulting wit this bunch, they were obnoxious and actually bussed us to a conference center and held us hostage until the next bus came along, eeek!
Best wishes!
Anti m
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Ranger Genius
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anti-M wrote:I think Vegas is a most excellent place to get hitched.
You only think that because you did it.
Good ideas for being obnoxious:
Make out with your significant other during the presentation. Leave to use the restroom repeatedly, announcing "I gotta take a (piss, dump)," or better yet, use a different euphemism every time.
At the end of their presentation, tell them that you weren't paying attention and ask them to repeat the whole thing. Or just do what my good friend Vanessa would and take a book and headphones.
During the inevitable Q&A session, take the opportunity to ask completely inappropriately personal questions: "How many women have you slept with?" "Does your girlfriend/wife give good head?"
Or nonsensical questions: "How many ducks will you trade for my magic kidney stone?" Of course, if you do that they'll know you're just fucking with them.
See how long you can test their greed-induced patience. Take along a photo album (even better if it's someone else's photo album) of a very boring vacation. Tell them in great detail about every single picture. Tell them about your Genealogy. Most annoying of all: describe a dream (or better, a whole BUNCH of dreams) you've had to them. (Am I the only one who's willing to admit that a detailed description of anyone else's dream is as boring as watching worms fuck?) In other words, force them to feign interest for as long as possible.
“We cross our bridges when we come to them and burn them behind us, with nothing to show for our progress except a memory of the smell of smoke, and a presumption that once our eyes watered.”
Well, we cancelled the payment through the credit card, some friends of mine finally overcame my optimism and helped me see the reality of the situation, which was that they have lied to us and not dealt fairly with us from step one, so there's no reason to expect them to start doing so at this point.
I guess I had placed too much faith in them being human beings with souls, and expected that telling them we were getting married that weekend would soften their greedy vegas hearts into just letting us pay to rent the rooms without having to deal with the rest of the hoopla. A very good friend reminded me that ours was probably far from a novel situation for them...
I had to fuck with him a little bit, so I did call him back finally and rake his ass over the coals as he tried to be as ingratiating as possible, and let him try to act like he had done us the huge favor of finding a resort that would accept us despite the problems involved before telling him my counter-offer;
"Take your resort, your "tour", your bogus retarded "prizes" and cram them all up your ass and twist until the blood's running freely. Oh, and by the way, go ahead and take us to court if you feel like paying for our wedding and the rooms we've already booked. If you're smart, you'll just walk away from this and never try to fleece a wolf in sheep's clothing again, you soulless miserable money grubbing can't-get-a-good-job-except-out-in-desert-cheating-and-swindling-people fucko jackass."
Thanks for the suggestions though...
I guess I had placed too much faith in them being human beings with souls, and expected that telling them we were getting married that weekend would soften their greedy vegas hearts into just letting us pay to rent the rooms without having to deal with the rest of the hoopla. A very good friend reminded me that ours was probably far from a novel situation for them...
I had to fuck with him a little bit, so I did call him back finally and rake his ass over the coals as he tried to be as ingratiating as possible, and let him try to act like he had done us the huge favor of finding a resort that would accept us despite the problems involved before telling him my counter-offer;
"Take your resort, your "tour", your bogus retarded "prizes" and cram them all up your ass and twist until the blood's running freely. Oh, and by the way, go ahead and take us to court if you feel like paying for our wedding and the rooms we've already booked. If you're smart, you'll just walk away from this and never try to fleece a wolf in sheep's clothing again, you soulless miserable money grubbing can't-get-a-good-job-except-out-in-desert-cheating-and-swindling-people fucko jackass."
Thanks for the suggestions though...
My almost ex dragged me to two of these things years ago. Both pitches she was actually interested in until downer-boy -- moi, pointed out the true economics of the matter. One was a time share in Ocean City, with the reward being a free weekend at a later date. The other was land in a planned community on a lake and I forget what the reward was, in any case in microscopic type there were lines 'or xxx of simular value' This was in the 15th *** down. The prizes were not worth the gas to get there and in the Ocean City case were discounts for crap that not even my stbx would buy.
I lately attended a pitch for a retirement/golf community It was a group thing and dinner was pretty good. Ok, OK, it was on a dead night and I figured that a free dinner and entertainment was worth a couple of hours. As it was it took a little more than an hour, part of the pitch was during dinner and afterwards individual salesmen/women were hitting on tables. I got my pass when I started the questions with 'Do you have any activities that someone who is not half dead might be interested in? Mountain biking, competitive martial arts, road bike racing, anything? After some blah, blah I stood up said "Well I don't want to waste your time' and I left. I realize the I may have actually done the salesman some good, I think I pissed off some of my tablemates who considered golf 1. a sport and 2. an interesting activity.
Statements for those who like golf: First: I have played golf with friends more than several times and 1. It is not a sport until someone loses an eye or breaks a major bone, 2. watching cars rust is much more interesting. Second, I am 51, my father came in second in a camel race in Oz at 78 (second oldest finisher: 57, winner 36). Three, Zappa said golf is the game you play just before you die, he played golf once and three months later he was dead (granted he was dieing at the time).
I lately attended a pitch for a retirement/golf community It was a group thing and dinner was pretty good. Ok, OK, it was on a dead night and I figured that a free dinner and entertainment was worth a couple of hours. As it was it took a little more than an hour, part of the pitch was during dinner and afterwards individual salesmen/women were hitting on tables. I got my pass when I started the questions with 'Do you have any activities that someone who is not half dead might be interested in? Mountain biking, competitive martial arts, road bike racing, anything? After some blah, blah I stood up said "Well I don't want to waste your time' and I left. I realize the I may have actually done the salesman some good, I think I pissed off some of my tablemates who considered golf 1. a sport and 2. an interesting activity.
Statements for those who like golf: First: I have played golf with friends more than several times and 1. It is not a sport until someone loses an eye or breaks a major bone, 2. watching cars rust is much more interesting. Second, I am 51, my father came in second in a camel race in Oz at 78 (second oldest finisher: 57, winner 36). Three, Zappa said golf is the game you play just before you die, he played golf once and three months later he was dead (granted he was dieing at the time).
My grandfather tried to raise me as a Southern gentleman, that means that I can be a real SOB some of the time.
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Dustdevil
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I realized many years ago that these high pressure sales persons will do most anything to get into your wallet. I seem to get "invited" to several of the sales pitches every year. They usually start with an OK dinner at a local place. They then proceed to move on to the sales pitch. I find they will pretty much will leave you alone if you say the right things. IE, " I would really love to buy a unit, but after the third time my identity got stolen I had to declare bankruptcy just to get out of the credit card sink hole." I get a dinner and that is the end.
Those who think they can and those who think they can't are both right.
I like Silver's approach! 
Somehow the topic of retirement communities came up at work, along with how deathly quiet and dull they are. I chimed into the discussion with how I, at age 40, still listen to the Clash and the Dead Kennedys, so I figured I would never be allowed into a retirement community. (Apparently that statement really ammused one of our customers.)
I mentioned this thread to a friend of mine, and he pointed out that attending one of these presentations would be perfect for me, since the salemen would leave me alone after checking my credit rating....
Somehow the topic of retirement communities came up at work, along with how deathly quiet and dull they are. I chimed into the discussion with how I, at age 40, still listen to the Clash and the Dead Kennedys, so I figured I would never be allowed into a retirement community. (Apparently that statement really ammused one of our customers.)I mentioned this thread to a friend of mine, and he pointed out that attending one of these presentations would be perfect for me, since the salemen would leave me alone after checking my credit rating....
"Nothing is withheld from us which we have conceived to do.
Do things that have never been done."
--Russell Kirsch
Do things that have never been done."
--Russell Kirsch
Ok, so the fuckballs who didn't disclose all the terms and conditions of the agreement we entered into are now trying to charge us $75 cancellation fee for 3 rooms cancelled ($25 each) instead of $690 for a total of three rooms and a possible $750 penalty for not qualifying for the "tour/sales presentation".
They never disclosed that we'd need to either be married or cohabitating WITH the same address on our driver's licenses to "qualify" for their sales presentation, so technically they have no legal right to charge us anything, but I know if I contest it, I may be stirring up a hornet's nest, and what with the wedding being so close, I don't have the time nor desire to continue fighting with these assholes.
But it sticks in my craw to be taken advantage of like this.
It took me from tuesday to middle of friday last week to get this resolved to even this much of a conclusion, and they get paid to fuck people over, while I have to contend with them in my spare time from work. I doubt they will let this go, even if I file fraud charges and countersue for the additional expense we've incurred in having to book other rooms barely a week before our arrival date.
Anyone ever deal with a timeshare scam like this and have a good or even satisfactory resolution to it?
Any suggestions?
They never disclosed that we'd need to either be married or cohabitating WITH the same address on our driver's licenses to "qualify" for their sales presentation, so technically they have no legal right to charge us anything, but I know if I contest it, I may be stirring up a hornet's nest, and what with the wedding being so close, I don't have the time nor desire to continue fighting with these assholes.
But it sticks in my craw to be taken advantage of like this.
It took me from tuesday to middle of friday last week to get this resolved to even this much of a conclusion, and they get paid to fuck people over, while I have to contend with them in my spare time from work. I doubt they will let this go, even if I file fraud charges and countersue for the additional expense we've incurred in having to book other rooms barely a week before our arrival date.
Anyone ever deal with a timeshare scam like this and have a good or even satisfactory resolution to it?
Any suggestions?
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Rob the Wop
- Posts: 1814
- Joined: Mon Sep 01, 2003 4:06 pm
- Location: Furbackistan, OR
- Contact:
Yes. "If it sounds too good to be true, then it is."Force wrote: Any suggestions?
I have no idea why you would get into any kind of dealings with timeshare folks, they do not have your best interests in mind. Kind of pointless, pointing out the obvious, but there it is in a nutshell. I hope you know better next time.
Get copies of everything you have signed. Bring them to a lawyer that specializes in fraud cases. It will cost you anywhere from $35-$100 for a hour of their time- but it will be worth it.
You will be able to fight this in small claims court. I seriously doubt you have legal recourse, but the lawyer will be able to tell you this. At least be glad that you can use the small claims route due to the money involved, as prolonged civil battles can cost you $3000-$5000 in legal fees. And you DO NOT automatically get your legal fees covered when you win- usually the opposite. This makes it not worth fighting. There is far more latitude in the small claims arena.
[b]The other, other white meat.[/b]
I think you should call your credit card company. Tell your credit card company that you do not authorize any charges from the time share people. Tell the credit card people you did not know about the "have to be married" part or whatever, and that you don't want anything charged.
You have the right to contest charges that show up on your credit card bill. If you are willing to be a little slimy, tell the credit card people that your Filipino fiance was the one that got sucked into this mess and she had did not understand all the fine print (I admit, playing the "I don't understand English" card is slimy but it may be your only way out and it may save you legal fees.
That being said... I got married last year a couple weeks before Burning Man, and we detoured to Las Vegas and to Reno for our honeymoon briefly. We were only in Las Vegas for one night and in Reno for one night. We got hit on by the timeshare people over a dozen times in each place. Sometimes it was the same salespeople over and over again. I finally took a brochure, and just waved it at them whenever one started to come our way. It proved effective. "I've got the info, thanks." Trying to ward them off with a "No thank you" "I've said No a hundred times already" did not seem to work at all. Timeshares just seem to be a scary investment to me. Definitely not something I was prepared to take on while in my post-wedding exhaustion- pre-playa excitement haze.
Friends of ours have purchased a 2 bedroom timeshare in Orlando. They used it for the first time this year. They have it for one or two weeks every other year I guess. For them, they believe it will save them money because they enjoy bringing the kid to Disney and in the long term I suppose, they think it will be cheaper than getting hotel rooms. I haven't done the math out, and I don't want to. They seem to be happy with the deal they got though.
You have the right to contest charges that show up on your credit card bill. If you are willing to be a little slimy, tell the credit card people that your Filipino fiance was the one that got sucked into this mess and she had did not understand all the fine print (I admit, playing the "I don't understand English" card is slimy but it may be your only way out and it may save you legal fees.
That being said... I got married last year a couple weeks before Burning Man, and we detoured to Las Vegas and to Reno for our honeymoon briefly. We were only in Las Vegas for one night and in Reno for one night. We got hit on by the timeshare people over a dozen times in each place. Sometimes it was the same salespeople over and over again. I finally took a brochure, and just waved it at them whenever one started to come our way. It proved effective. "I've got the info, thanks." Trying to ward them off with a "No thank you" "I've said No a hundred times already" did not seem to work at all. Timeshares just seem to be a scary investment to me. Definitely not something I was prepared to take on while in my post-wedding exhaustion- pre-playa excitement haze.
Friends of ours have purchased a 2 bedroom timeshare in Orlando. They used it for the first time this year. They have it for one or two weeks every other year I guess. For them, they believe it will save them money because they enjoy bringing the kid to Disney and in the long term I suppose, they think it will be cheaper than getting hotel rooms. I haven't done the math out, and I don't want to. They seem to be happy with the deal they got though.
Icepack
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[email protected]
Again, they didn't disclose this was a timeshare until after they made the reservations, charged the credit card, and THEN sent us an email confirming the whole thing and explaining that the "tour" was actually a sales pitch session.Rob the Wop wrote:Yes. "If it sounds too good to be true, then it is."Force wrote: Any suggestions?
I have no idea why you would get into any kind of dealings with timeshare folks, ...
I've done some dumb things in my life, but intentionally signing up to sit through a timeshare presentation on the day of my wedding sure as hell ain't one of em. You always hear about these great deals on travel and hotel rooms in vegas, usually with the intention of getting you into a particular hotel so you'll gamble in their casino. I took this to be one of those.
I've heard of free/heavily discounted airline travel, free rooms, free gambling money, etc.,etc.,etc., so there was no reason to suspect this was any different.
Thanks for the advice tho.
I'm thinking of responding the the manager's email where he attempts to appear to be the reasonable one by ONLY charging us a $75 cancellation fee and telling him to have fun with the lung cancer/brain tumor/impotence his bad karma is surely bringing his way, and that right quick...
The one thing that there is no comeback for...
We never stay In the same hotel for a full week. We prefer to stay 3 days here, 4 days there and so forth.
Time shares are rented only by the week. Ownership is blocks of weeks.
Time shares are rented only by the week. Ownership is blocks of weeks.
I'd still recommend seeing if you can get the credit card company to reverse the charge. Let them know that you were lied to/misled. If the timeshare people have to deal with a credit card company instead of an individual they might very well drop the whole thing as not worth their time. The credit card company might prove to be willing to work with you, even if it is just in order to keep you as a customer.Again, they didn't disclose this was a timeshare until after they made the reservations, charged the credit card, and THEN sent us an email confirming the whole thing and explaining that the "tour" was actually a sales pitch session.
Good luck!
"Nothing is withheld from us which we have conceived to do.
Do things that have never been done."
--Russell Kirsch
Do things that have never been done."
--Russell Kirsch
Yeah, we have disputed it through the credit card, so the charges have been taken off, which I informed the timeshare people of (after telling them they could take their "offer" and cram it up and sideways and twist until it bleeds)
So now, these retards have CREDITED back to her credit card an ADDITIONAL $1200, and are attempting to charge us $75 as a "cancellation fee" even though it wasn't a legal contract to begin with.
And are making noises about filing charges against us for "merchant fraud" or somesuch. Even though we recieved no goods or services from them, unless you count the lesson we learned not to trust anyone in Vegas farther than you can spit a rat.
Nice.
Is that lesson worth $75? Is it worth not having to deal with these scumbags to just pay it even though we shouldn't have to? I'm starting to think it is- long as they don't piss me off any further...
So now, these retards have CREDITED back to her credit card an ADDITIONAL $1200, and are attempting to charge us $75 as a "cancellation fee" even though it wasn't a legal contract to begin with.
And are making noises about filing charges against us for "merchant fraud" or somesuch. Even though we recieved no goods or services from them, unless you count the lesson we learned not to trust anyone in Vegas farther than you can spit a rat.
Nice.
Is that lesson worth $75? Is it worth not having to deal with these scumbags to just pay it even though we shouldn't have to? I'm starting to think it is- long as they don't piss me off any further...
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Mister Jellyfish Mister
- Posts: 2367
- Joined: Thu Mar 11, 2004 12:02 pm
- Location: Sparks, Nevada
- Contact:
The real enemy
There is a small, pocket-size device that is the mortal enemy of all time share salesman... the dreaded calculator!
Show them how, with the same monthly payments, you could buy a similar rental property, rent it out for a profit, stay there in between tenants for free, and write it all off on your taxes. You might just make them cry!
Show them how, with the same monthly payments, you could buy a similar rental property, rent it out for a profit, stay there in between tenants for free, and write it all off on your taxes. You might just make them cry!
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