How to Layoff People?

flatlander13 · Post by **flatlander13** » Thu Nov 05, 2009 9:52 am

With so many people having experienced the joy of being laid off from their jobâ€¦â€¦..I was wondering; how would you layoff people?

Iâ€™ll go firstâ€¦â€¦â€¦I would lay people off the week before Christmas. I would have the company CEO play Santa. The other â€œcompany officersâ€

Ugly Dougly · Post by **Ugly Dougly** » Thu Nov 05, 2009 10:59 am

Go to Jack in the Box and pick up employment applications.
Then just leave those on the desks of the Chosen Ones.

Fire_Moose · Post by **Fire_Moose** » Thu Nov 05, 2009 12:05 pm

a kick to the groin followed by my laughing at them and dropping the notice on their chest

Post by **AntiM** » Thu Nov 05, 2009 12:17 pm

Label an envelope "Bonus Check" then put their pink slip in it. Best sent via inter-office mail.

Post by **Sham** » Thu Nov 05, 2009 1:53 pm

I've got good new and bad news: You know all those chores you've been putting off at your house.......

Ugly Dougly · Post by **Ugly Dougly** » Thu Nov 05, 2009 4:47 pm

Donald, why don't you come into my office for a minute?

And bring everything in your desk while you're at it!

dr.placebo · Post by **dr.placebo** » Thu Nov 05, 2009 5:50 pm

Offer them a transfer to the branch office in Kabul. Tell them it's not optional.

littleflower · Post by **littleflower** » Thu Nov 05, 2009 5:53 pm

dr.placebo wrote:Offer them a transfer to the branch office in Kabul. Tell them it's not optional.

this happened to me! only it was wichita. with a 35% pay cut.

Elorrum · Post by **Elorrum** » Thu Nov 05, 2009 5:58 pm

I've been layed off before, and I can't think of any way I'd rather they would had done it. I was layed off once the day after Christmas. It was not a favor to wait as I had spent more money than I would have on gifts. Perhaps if they had given me a ticket for a world cruise and told me I would have to look for another job when I got back. That would have been nice.