Excited but intimidated virgin

Start here - tell us about yourself and what brings you to ePlaya.
Post Reply
greenphelan
Posts: 2
Joined: Sun May 16, 2010 11:16 am

Excited but intimidated virgin

Post by greenphelan » Sun May 16, 2010 1:33 pm

Hello online burner community! First a bit about myself. I'm a 26 year old self employed engineer who lives in the great city of Austin Tx. I've never been to anything like burning man before, but I really love Art, Fire, Nature, camping, and the 10 burning man principles all sound great to me.

I will be going to my first burning man this year and have realized I should probably start planning already. I'm very excited but I'm also a bit intimidated about getting myself and particularly all my gear there.

Transportation: I may have to fly in due to me and my friend who's coming with me not having enough time to drive all the way from Texas. Does anyone have any tips of how to get your gear there if you are flying? From reading the survival guide and posts on this forum it seems there is a lot of gear that I will need to bring, but airlines these days make you pay for a checked bag. I'm thinking all the gear I would need would be considerably larger than a checked bag, and I'm not even sure how I would pack it all.

Meeting people, participating, and helping out: Okay, so I'm generally friendly, but also very shy. Are most people generally friendly to strangers on the playa? Sorry if that's a stupid question. A lot of the posts I've read give me the impression that most people are weary of moochers and I'm afraid my attempts at meeting people will be construed as mooching. Any tips on gifts to bring that could perhaps help with that anxiety? I would like to participate as much as possible, but I'm not too good at costumes. I would rather help out in other ways if possible. Is too late to volunteer, or does anyone need any help with say washing dishes or setting up camp, or installing art projects? I really do think the more I help out and participate in whatever capacity I can the more fun I will have. Perhaps I should join a theme camp? Sorry I know that question has been asked before just thinking aloud here. What is the etiquette for theme camps? Is it okay to just walk in and introduce yourself or do you have to be invited to even walk in to a camp.

Sorry for all the questions. Any tips or encouragements would be greatly appreciated. Can't wait to see all you beautiful burners in September!

greenphelan
Posts: 2
Joined: Sun May 16, 2010 11:16 am

Post by greenphelan » Sun May 16, 2010 2:12 pm

So I figured out the helping out thing and filled out a volunteer questionnaire. I think it will be a great way for a shy guy like me to meet people on the playa.

User avatar
shroom
Posts: 1125
Joined: Thu Jul 23, 2009 3:11 pm
Burning Since: 2010
Location: Georgia

Post by shroom » Sun May 16, 2010 3:42 pm

My first year too!

Keep reading this site, the burning man survival guide and current.com has burning man videos. I've had a lot of my questions answered by doing this.
"Success is not the result of spontaneous combustion. You must first set yourself on fire."~~Fred Shero

User avatar
Sham
Moderator
Posts: 8951
Joined: Thu Oct 23, 2008 2:10 am
Location: The hidden mythical place.....

Post by Sham » Sun May 16, 2010 6:01 pm

Hey there, welcome to eplaya!


Shambala

User avatar
dragonpilot
Posts: 1653
Joined: Tue May 08, 2007 12:53 pm
Burning Since: 2005
Camp Name: Retrofrolic
Location: Seattle, WA

Post by dragonpilot » Sun May 16, 2010 6:55 pm

You're in Austin? There's a huge Burner Regional contingent in Austin! Get in touch with those folks. You may get some help with getting gear hauled out there for ya.

Doesn't Southwest Airlines fly outta Austin? No baggage fees!! You'll need food, water, and shelter. A good-sized tent is smaller than most carry-on suitcases or duffels. That plus your personal clothing/costume bag, and that's all you need on the flight.

Food, water, and beverages, plus a cheap cooler can be purchased in Reno or San Francisco...or anything else you need!

Transportation from Reno to BRC...there's a BRC Help Desk at the Reno Airport...or rent a car (get hot on the car, tho...they go quick and they're expensive from Reno). Consider Las Vegas...slightly longer drive, but more rental car options. It ain't gonna be easy, but anything this good shouldn't be easy!

Good luck!
Don't bore your friends with all your troubles. Tell your enemies instead, for they will delight in hearing about them.

User avatar
C.f.M.
Posts: 3610
Joined: Wed Jul 01, 2009 1:28 pm
Burning Since: 2009
Camp Name: Stag Camp 810&D

Post by C.f.M. » Mon May 17, 2010 5:42 am

Are most people generally friendly to strangers on the playa?

My experience: no.

It was staggeringly heartbreaking and disappointing for me, how cliqueish and unfriendly I felt people to be - and I'm not one to wait around for the other person to say hello.

Meeting new people was one of my top goals, and it didn't happen. Not even with the people in the theme camp I was with.

Maybe I'm just really spoiled by how awesome the regionals I go to are (where I have met people passing by that I'm friends with years later), but I experienced a world of difference, in how people behaved.

...a couple of weeks after I went to my regional, and had all my faith in burns and burners restored.

Thecatman
Posts: 3045
Joined: Mon Apr 16, 2007 8:47 pm
Burning Since: 2002
Camp Name: alone
Location: Carson City. About 125 miles south of BRC

Post by Thecatman » Mon May 17, 2010 8:06 am

WELCOME!!

In the mornings if you ride or walk by small individual camps, most people will greet you. If you participate in a theme camps event, most people are usually cool and "down to earth."
At least thats been my experience
My cats are cuter than your grandkids!

"Government is not the solution to our problems, government is the problem." Ronald Reagan

User avatar
Mojojita
Posts: 1165
Joined: Tue Mar 09, 2010 10:17 am
Location: Under your bed

Post by Mojojita » Mon May 17, 2010 10:28 am

I have never met a more open "friendly" place than BRC. Maybe I should get out more.

CFM - you are welcome to come have a drink with me in my camp any time. Come to think of it, the atmosphere is completely different out on the Esplanade than it is further back in the camps - don't forget to walk around the city somewhere other than on the Esplanade (which I find usually less interactive than everyplace else in the city.)

User avatar
C.f.M.
Posts: 3610
Joined: Wed Jul 01, 2009 1:28 pm
Burning Since: 2009
Camp Name: Stag Camp 810&D

Post by C.f.M. » Mon May 17, 2010 11:13 am

Thanks - I thought all the bars would be pretty welcoming to someone wanting a drink, but more than once I got flat-out ignored by the bartender. Or treated like a hassle, for sticking my cup on the bar.

One of the bar camps was even my neighbor. I walked up to camps who were seemingly having parties or whatever, thinking they must be friendly and welcoming but over and over, it seemed people couldn't care less.

Maybe if I was thinner and wearing a bikini bottom and fur leggings. :roll:

It was just a far cry from what I'm used to.

User avatar
swampdog
Posts: 917
Joined: Thu Jul 22, 2004 8:27 am
Burning Since: 2004
Camp Name: Rising Arms Pub
Location: Bellingham WA

shy people untie!

Post by swampdog » Mon May 17, 2010 11:16 am

As a shy person myself, I can totally relate. I find Burning Man about the best place for me to go to confront my shyness. Burning Man is about the best place ever for what I'll call 'casual sociability' - "hi, how are you ,where you from?". Everyone is open.

I've built a few long term friendships through Burning Man, but it's still hard.

Some tips I would offer: 1. Have your own burn. There's a cubic metric* ton of stuff here about what you should do, shouldn't do, how to play, who expects what. Read it all and then forget it. Plan for a self reliant camping trip in harsh conditions. Prepare toys (costumes, etc) that you think will be fun for you (not what somebody else thinks will be fun). Think of ways to start conversations in the widest possible context you can. Don't think of "I should bring something for gifts" think of "can I bring something to start real conversations?"

Compliment people. You can't go wrong. (I don't need to say that "Hey pretty lady, whatcha doin?" usually doesn't count as a compliment, do I?) Give high fives at random

I like the vibe early in the week. Come as early as you can. By Friday it's a big city, peoples' filters come back up a bit, etc. Wednesday is often my best day of the week.

I find it a great laboratory of the self. It's a place where I can spend a week practicing saying "What do I want to do RIGHT NOW" instead of saying "what SHOULD I do, what am I SUPPOSED to be doing, what does my boss/wife/kids/society EXPECT of me right now."



*for you literal types - yes, I know there is no such thing as a cubic metric ton, but you've got to admit it conveys hugeness.

User avatar
Ugly Dougly
Posts: 17612
Joined: Wed Sep 10, 2003 9:31 am
Burning Since: 1996
Location: เชียงใหม่

Post by Ugly Dougly » Mon May 17, 2010 12:43 pm

C.f.M. wrote: Maybe if I was thinner and wearing a bikini bottom and fur leggings. :roll:
Worked for me. ;)

User avatar
Boijoy
Posts: 1445
Joined: Wed Aug 23, 2006 4:51 pm
Burning Since: 2006
Camp Name: Metro Mart
Location: Metro Mart. 4:30 Plaza

Post by Boijoy » Mon May 17, 2010 1:31 pm

C.f.M. wrote:Thanks - I thought all the bars would be pretty welcoming to someone wanting a drink, but more than once I got flat-out ignored by the bartender. Or treated like a hassle, for sticking my cup on the bar.

One of the bar camps was even my neighbor. I walked up to camps who were seemingly having parties or whatever, thinking they must be friendly and welcoming but over and over, it seemed people couldn't care less.

Maybe if I was thinner and wearing a bikini bottom and fur leggings. :roll:

It was just a far cry from what I'm used to.
This is not the first complaint that I've seen here re: rude bartenders.
I guess some bartenders are the same no matter where you are. & I have heard about the "private parties" at BM also.
I usually like to grab a buddy when I'm out and about on the playa. Then if someone is rude,, fek em, & move on.
It's weird when you get the "bad vibe" out there,, it brings you down & it's REAL hard to shake for some reason.
don't forget to floss

User avatar
C.f.M.
Posts: 3610
Joined: Wed Jul 01, 2009 1:28 pm
Burning Since: 2009
Camp Name: Stag Camp 810&D

Post by C.f.M. » Mon May 17, 2010 1:37 pm

"It's weird when you get the "bad vibe" out there,, it brings you down & it's REAL hard to shake for some reason."

Yup. Especially when you get it day after day, going back out there with positive thinking, only to return back to camp sad and alone.

Seriously. If it hadn't been for my regional, shortly thereafter...I'm not sure what I would have done.

Maybe it's just West Coast people, lacking the infamous Southern hospitality to which I am accustomed. 8)

User avatar
misfit
Posts: 573
Joined: Tue Sep 13, 2005 12:45 pm
Burning Since: 1996
Camp Name: wish you were here
Location: norcal
Contact:

Post by misfit » Mon May 17, 2010 1:54 pm

>>>>Maybe it's just West Coast people, lacking the infamous Southern hospitality to which I am accustomed<<<<

maybe,,, but doubtful... the bars you hit were east coast bars... :roll:
Be happy while you're living, For you're a long time dead.

User avatar
Ugly Dougly
Posts: 17612
Joined: Wed Sep 10, 2003 9:31 am
Burning Since: 1996
Location: เชียงใหม่

Post by Ugly Dougly » Mon May 17, 2010 2:01 pm

Well, it shouldn't be a surprise that in a sudden city of thousands, that different people will find different experiences. I had a great time at the Booby Bar, both before AND after I introduced myself. Your mileage may vary.

Thecatman
Posts: 3045
Joined: Mon Apr 16, 2007 8:47 pm
Burning Since: 2002
Camp Name: alone
Location: Carson City. About 125 miles south of BRC

Post by Thecatman » Mon May 17, 2010 8:48 pm

swampdog wrote:Give high fives at random
Happens all the time when riding or walking around the city. :D
There are alot of clicks...people who known each other for a long time talking I just take it that their kinda reserved.
I don't have the gift of gab
I'm gonna try the meet and greet this year and there is a thread in "open disscusion."
My cats are cuter than your grandkids!

"Government is not the solution to our problems, government is the problem." Ronald Reagan

User avatar
littleflower
Posts: 3420
Joined: Mon Sep 01, 2008 7:30 pm
Location: rainforest canopy

Post by littleflower » Mon May 17, 2010 9:09 pm

welcome greenphelan!

i'm also terribly shy ... and not a good talker. the eplaya helped a lot! there are some terrific peeps around here, and the meet 'n greet gives you an opportunity to talk to some of them. but there were also times when someone would just start talking to me ... and it was wonderful. that may happen in the south, where they're famous for it .... but it almost NEVER happens where i live (in L.A.) .... so ...

as others have said .... do your own thing, and have no expectations. just have fun and enjoy the scenery....

User avatar
gyre
Posts: 15457
Joined: Sun Aug 07, 2005 6:01 pm
Location: ΦάÏ

Post by gyre » Tue May 18, 2010 6:10 am

Shambala wrote:Hey there, welcome to eplaya!


Shambala
ImageImageImage

User avatar
Sham
Moderator
Posts: 8951
Joined: Thu Oct 23, 2008 2:10 am
Location: The hidden mythical place.....

Post by Sham » Tue May 18, 2010 6:41 am

gyre wrote:
Shambala wrote:Hey there, welcome to eplaya!


Shambala
ImageImageImage
Thank you gyre. For a minute I thought my humor would go unnoticed!

User avatar
gyre
Posts: 15457
Joined: Sun Aug 07, 2005 6:01 pm
Location: ΦάÏ

Post by gyre » Tue May 18, 2010 6:51 am

Hard to miss.

User avatar
Elorrum
Posts: 6202
Joined: Sat Mar 15, 2008 9:09 pm
Burning Since: 2007

Post by Elorrum » Tue May 18, 2010 9:00 am

I try to chalk it up to some people needing to define who is outside in order for them to feel more "in" They have some insecurity issues perhaps. Everyone has a story that could break your heart, and one that could double you over in laughter.

Somebody yelled "tourist" at me my first year and laughed and sneered with their friends. I am not into costuming. So that's not my thing. moving along. It bothered me as I was pretty much on my own outside of my immediate neighborhood. Then as I was watching a very cool remote control shark zooming around and chomping at people, somebody stood by me, we laughed together, and hugged. It can balance out. You are in if you say you are. If you are shy like me, act as if you aren't, it's good practice and Burning man is all about trying out and practicing and making believe.

User avatar
xhoosier
Posts: 105
Joined: Tue May 12, 2009 8:43 pm
Burning Since: 2009
Location: Washington

2009 was my first year

Post by xhoosier » Thu May 27, 2010 9:40 pm

day one
I was told to roll in the dust
I wondered what the hell I was doing in the desert
I was asked by a lady at 2 AM if this was my first year
I was shy and watched people dance

day 2
I was hung over
I met lots of people
I found some new clothes
I had blisters on my feet

day 3
I was one of the crew
I hung around city center and talked for hours
I went back to places I went to the first night and people told me welcome back.
I spent hours at the temple thinking about my life

day 4
I was dusty from head to toe
I woke up and drank beer
I spent hours talking to others who walked by my camp site
I was talking about coming back 2010
I danced for hours
I watched the man burn

day 5
I packed
I was sad
I was hungry for a hot meal
I drove out and swore I would stay to watch the temple burn in 2010


One of the best experiences I have ever had. My wife (who didn't go) said I smiled for a month. I can't wait to come to this years event but need to keep my excitment down because everyone is tired of hearing all my comments on what I saw and did!! funny the things that pop into your mind at the wrong time.

Can't wait to get sandy and say welcome home!!

Post Reply

Return to “The Greeter's Station”