Date Rape at Burning Man

flatlander13 · Post by **flatlander13** » Fri May 21, 2010 8:44 am

I notice that we seem to have lost SFBurnergrrrlâ€¦â€¦.

So, SF, have you looked for any other help besides Eplaya and self help books? I donâ€™t know about the self help books you have read, but posting this on Eplaya may not be a healthy thing.

DVD Burner · Post by **DVD Burner** » Fri May 21, 2010 8:46 am

Professional psychiatric help is what's needed here.
Also dont think BM is the best thing for her.

Dr. Pyro · Post by **Dr. Pyro** » Fri May 21, 2010 8:56 am

That's about the most well-thought out response I have read on this thread to date. Good job.

gyre · Post by **gyre** » Fri May 21, 2010 9:35 am

I think there are two possibilities, one being that this is a complete fake.
The other is that this is someone with real questions and difficulty.
Sadly, there are people with no handle on social interaction, for whatever reasons, and it's not as rare as we might like to think.

This thread has touched on just about every area of social behavior between people, and it's clear how many misunderstandings this person has.
Whatever happened that night, if these are genuine questions about how people think and act, we should try to be enlightening.
Remember that just because something seems painfully obvious to us, it may not be to everyone.
Everything seems obvious when you know it, doesn't it?

I think SF Burner Girl is the person who posted some time ago, saying she had been raped and didn't realize it at the time.
I never really knew how to respond to that, but I always meant to.

Let's assume good intentions here.

As Theseus said in Midsummer Night's Dream,
"If we imagine no worse of them than they of
themselves, they may pass for excellent men. "

rodiponer · Post by **rodiponer** » Fri May 21, 2010 9:40 am

Julian wrote:As for drunk people not being able to give consent: while I would agree that if one person is blotto and the other is coherent might fall well within the boundaries of bad behavior at best and rape at worst, if both participants are shit-canned all bets are off.

I think this is a myth. I do not think alcohol, or any recreational drug, can make people do things that they do not want to do. For me, at least, even when I have been connected to reality by the thinnest thread, I've never lost my sense of right and wrong or did anything that I truly did not want to do.

Make you think you are funny, when you are not? Yes.
Make you more outgoing? Yes.
But make you start raping people? No.
Make you have sex with people you don't want to, at that moment? No.
Lower your standards for a sexual partner? Yes.

It is degrading to women to say that they cannot consent to sex when they are intoxicated. I know that is the law, but I do not agree with it. It's certainly rape if they are unconscious. But slurring words? Come on, no one's brain is so fragile and stupid that they should be recategorized as some kind of minor when they've had a few drinks.

DVD Burner · Post by **DVD Burner** » Fri May 21, 2010 10:54 am

I have yet come into a guy that is so shit faced that he can have sex.

Usually when guys are THAT SHIT FACED they can not rise to the occasion.

C.f.M. · Post by **C.f.M.** » Fri May 21, 2010 11:54 am

DVD Burner wrote:I have yet come into a guy that is so shit faced that he can have sex.

Usually when guys are THAT SHIT FACED they can not rise to the occasion.

Disagree.

Otherwise I'd never have a boyfriend...

DVD Burner · Post by **DVD Burner** » Fri May 21, 2010 12:17 pm

C.f.M. wrote:
DVD Burner wrote:I have yet come into a guy that is so shit faced that he can have sex.

Usually when guys are THAT SHIT FACED they can not rise to the occasion.
Disagree.

Otherwise I'd never have a boyfriend...

He can get THAT SLOPPY and deliver?

How can you stand it? LOL!

You poor girl.

You are missing out. The sex cant possibly be all that good. LOL!

C.f.M. · Post by **C.f.M.** » Fri May 21, 2010 12:24 pm

Doesn't matter, since I don't remember any of it...ah, special time together black-out drunk. Key to a lasting relationship...."Are we fighting?"

"...I dunno."

"Cool. Let's go get tacos."

Post by **Sham** » Fri May 21, 2010 12:30 pm

As we work down page 5 of date raping, I am really getting the urge to give it a try!

Fire_Moose · Post by **Fire_Moose** » Fri May 21, 2010 12:54 pm

DVD Burner wrote:I have yet come into a guy that is so shit faced...

Terrible, terrible choice of words

Fire_Moose · Post by **Fire_Moose** » Fri May 21, 2010 12:54 pm

"if it wasn't for date rape I'd never get laid"

C.f.M. · Post by **C.f.M.** » Fri May 21, 2010 12:57 pm

Fire_Moose wrote:
DVD Burner wrote:I have yet come into a guy that is so shit faced...
Terrible, terrible choice of words

a-hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Post by **Sham** » Fri May 21, 2010 6:10 pm

Fire_Moose wrote:"if it wasn't for date rape I'd never get laid"

"If it wasn't for date rape, I'd never have a date"!

EmilyD · Post by **EmilyD** » Fri May 21, 2010 9:05 pm

flatlander13 wrote:I notice that we seem to have lost SFBurnergrrrlâ€¦â€¦.

So, SF, have you looked for any other help besides Eplaya and self help books? I donâ€™t know about the self help books you have read, but posting this on Eplaya may not be a healthy thing.

Heh heh, I noticed this too flatlander13.

She responded readily to comments about all the points in her story and such but never at any point has answered several of us who asked, WHY post this HERE, NOW? And WHAT exactly do you want from us? Instead she seems to ignore those very simple questions and now...disappear. Although this post did indeed instigate some really good discussion about a painful topic, if it was really just about SFBurnergrrrl using us as a sounding board she should have been honest about that.

DVD Burner · Post by **DVD Burner** » Sat May 22, 2010 12:20 pm

Fire_Moose wrote:
DVD Burner wrote:I have yet come into a guy that is so shit faced...
Terrible, terrible choice of words

Ok, ya got me there.

Post by **mdmf007** » Sat May 22, 2010 6:18 pm

flatlander13 wrote:I notice that we seem to have lost SFBurnergrrrlâ€¦â€¦.

So, SF, have you looked for any other help besides Eplaya and self help books? I donâ€™t know about the self help books you have read, but posting this on Eplaya may not be a healthy thing.

Well she's not a sock if that helps i looked that up. I started to question the whole story as the blog is short and simple, so I was thinking it could have been a sock to stir things up.

Snow · Post by **Snow** » Sat May 22, 2010 6:38 pm

FKO are you behind this?

Token · Post by **Token** » Sat May 22, 2010 6:51 pm

If it is Brian, aka Fko, I think his handle here is "Brion 88" or somesuch.

Bob · Post by **Bob** » Sat May 22, 2010 9:42 pm

DVD Burner wrote:Professional psychiatric help is what's needed here.
Also dont think BM is the best thing for her.

Speak for yourself.

I'm not surprised so many peanut-gallery types have tried to pick apart the OP's story, not surprised at all. The only thing that doesn't ring true to me is the expectation that it doesn't, or shouldn't, happen at Burning Man.

POWERCHAIR · Post by **POWERCHAIR** » Sat May 22, 2010 10:17 pm

......

bm_cricket · Post by **bm_cricket** » Sat May 22, 2010 10:40 pm

POWERCHAIR wrote: YES a BIG thyme camp bar drudged one of my camp guest.

As a member of a big camp right now I am worried about this reputation spreading. Did you take appropriate action when you found out? Did you find the people? I guess I would like to say on behalf of big camps with bars that some of us are honestly good people. Weird people, but good ones.

POWERCHAIR · Post by **POWERCHAIR** » Sat May 22, 2010 10:57 pm

.....

bm_cricket · Post by **bm_cricket** » Sat May 22, 2010 11:07 pm

POWERCHAIR wrote:Yes it toke some time but we ID him with no help from the BRC rangers.
I have a pic of him but i wont post it.
And the BRC rangers did nothing to but give me a hard time and no help on playa.

Not knowing what happened myself so I can't speak for what the rangers did or didn't do... I know that they have a weird position in the community. Walking a weird tight rope between law enforcement and fellow Burners.

But I'm glad you were able to resolve it. I just hope that it doesn't sour the whole experience with big theme camps. Some of us really are nice.

POWERCHAIR · Post by **POWERCHAIR** » Sat May 22, 2010 11:14 pm

.....

DVD Burner · Post by **DVD Burner** » Sat May 22, 2010 11:39 pm

Bob wrote:
DVD Burner wrote:Professional psychiatric help is what's needed here.
Also dont think BM is the best thing for her.
Speak for yourself.

I'm not surprised so many peanut-gallery types have tried to pick apart the OP's story, not surprised at all. The only thing that doesn't ring true to me is the expectation that it doesn't, or shouldn't, happen at Burning Man.

Ummm, I think I did speak for myself.
Also dont think anyone was saying what one is to expect or not to expect at BM. If anything there is a question of her judgment and how she views the world whether default world or not.

Isotopia · Post by **Isotopia** » Sun May 23, 2010 2:37 pm

Thank you rangers for not even coming to or camp after it was reported to the BRC rangers near centercamp it's in there log but we had a no show from the kiestone rangersat camp.
I guse it's was to hard to find or camp at 6:45 centercamp.

48,000+ participants, 30 something volunteer Rangers on any of three shifts each dealing with other issues.

You know what? Fuck you.

BRC Rangers aren't cops. We don't do arrests. What you describe is a goddamn felony in any state in the fucking US. Your primary responsibility in this was notifying the LEOs. If it slipped through the cracks of notification by a Ranger then I'm sorry. That's unfortunate. It happens. But don't shit talk Rangers because they didn't do what you were morally responsible to do once you were aware of the situation.

If you're uncomfortable with with what happened I encourage you to check out the Ranger web site with the listed training dates so that you might become part of the solution rather than another mewing, whiny, ass-fuck complaining about your negative experience at BM.

bm_cricket · Post by **bm_cricket** » Sun May 23, 2010 3:53 pm

Isotopia wrote:But don't shit talk Rangers because they didn't do what you were morally responsible to do once you were aware of the situation.

I'm glad someone said it. I guess I'm not quite ready to start flaming about something on the ePlaya yet.

I know a lot of rangers and they put in more than their fair share of hours fixing other people's problems simply out of the kindness of their hearts. They do their best but they aren't law enforcement. Their main job is to prevent Burners from hurting themselves or getting screwed by the police for no good reason. One person wanting to take legal action against another person turns into a County, State, or Federal problem really quickly and isn't the job of the BM Rangers. Still, I would have hoped that the Rangers could have helped guide the process...

goathead · Post by **goathead** » Sun May 23, 2010 3:57 pm

This was all hashed out last fall.

DVD Burner · Post by **DVD Burner** » Sun May 23, 2010 3:59 pm

goathead wrote:This was all hashed out last fall.

Oh REALLY!

Do Tell!