cant go to bm this year? bitch and sob here!

[drucake]

yeah, so, i cant go this year. it sucks to see all your friends going and you cant. i hope to go next year. i had such an amazing time last year. i go to a lot of regionals, so its not like i never get to have that release, but i will for sure miss the playa. anyone else out there bummed out? :(

[Boijoy]

I am bummed out FOR you. sympathy bummed.

[Fire_Moose]

plan a No Burner Left Behind party for yer area. Or attend the one that someone else is holding. They have a live webcam up all week. I missed last year and spent burn night at our NBLB party and while it was still sad, i had a great time!

[Token]

Tear down your house. Put it in a truck. Drive 10 hours in any direction. Put the house back together. Invite everyone you meet to come over and party. When they leave, follow them back to their homes, drink all their booze, and break things.

Pay an escort of your affectional preference subset to not bathe for five days, cover themselves in glitter, dust, and sunscreen, wear a skanky neon wig, dance close naked, then say they have a lover back home at the end of the night.

Stack all your fans in one corner of the living room. Put on your most fabulous outfit. Turn the fans on full blast. Dump a vacuum cleaner bag in front of them.

Buy a new set of expensive camping gear. Break it.

Only use the toilet in a house that is at least 3 blocks away. Drain all the water from the toilet. Only flush it every 3 days. Hide all the toilet paper.

Set your house thermostat so it’s 50 degrees for the first hour of sleep and 100 degrees the rest of the night.

Before eating any food, drop it in a sandbox and lick a battery.

Mail $300 to the Reno casino of your choice.

Make a list of all the things you’ll do different next year. Never look at it.

Search alleys untill you find a couch so unbelievably tacky and nasty filthy that a state college frat house wouldn’t want it. Take a nap on the couch and sleep like you are king of the world.

Shop at Wal-mart, Cost-Co, and Home Depot until your car is completely packed with stuff. Tell everyone that you’re going to a "Leave-No-Trace" event. Empty your car into a dumpster.

Spend thousands of dollars and several months of your life building a deeply personal art work. Hide it in a funhouse on the edge of the city. Hire people to come by and alternate saying "I love it" and "this sucks balls". Blow it up.

Cut, burn, electrocute, bruise, and sunburn various parts of your body. Forget how you did it. Don’t go to a doctor.

Walk around your neighborhood and knock on doors until someone offers you cocktails and dinner.

Lean back in a chair until that point where you’re just about to fall over, but you catch yourself at the last moment. Hold that position for 9 hours.

Don’t sleep for 5 days. Take a wide variety of hallucinogenic/emotion altering drugs. Pick a fight with your boyfriend/girlfriend.

Set up a DJ system downwind of a three alarm fire. Play a short loop of drum’n'bass until the embers are cold.

Have a 3 a.m. soul baring conversation with a drag nun in platforms, a crocodile and Bugs Bunny. Be unable to tell if you’re hallucinating. Lust after Bugs Bunny.

Spend a whole year rummaging through thrift stores for the perfect, most outrageous costume. Forget to pack it.

Read "Dhalgren" by Samuel R. Delany. Read "The City Not Long After" by Pat Murphy. Cut off the bindings, throw all the pages up in the air, and shuffle them back together. Reread "The City After Dhalgren" by Samuel Murphy. Burn it. Read the ashes.

Listen to music you hate for 168 hours straight, or until you think you are going to scream. Scream. Realize you’ll love the music for the rest of your life.

Bust your ass for a "community." See all the attention get focused on the drama queen crybaby.

Get so drunk you can’t recognize your own house. Walk slowly around the block for 5 hours.

Tell your boss you aren’t coming to work this week but he should "gift" you a paycheck anyway. When he refuses accuse him of not loving the "community".

Ask your most annoying neighbor to interrupt your fun several times a day with third hand gossip about every horrible thing that’s happened in the last 24 hours. Have them wear khaki.

[Jackass]

Tear down your house. Put it in a truck. Drive 10 hours in any direction. Put the house back together. Invite everyone you meet to come over and party. When they leave, follow them back to their homes, drink all their booze, and break things.

Pay an escort of your affectional preference subset to not bathe for five days, cover themselves in glitter, dust, and sunscreen, wear a skanky neon wig, dance close naked, then say they have a lover back home at the end of the night.

Stack all your fans in one corner of the living room. Put on your most fabulous outfit. Turn the fans on full blast. Dump a vacuum cleaner bag in front of them.

Buy a new set of expensive camping gear. Break it.

Only use the toilet in a house that is at least 3 blocks away. Drain all the water from the toilet. Only flush it every 3 days. Hide all the toilet paper.

Set your house thermostat so it’s 50 degrees for the first hour of sleep and 100 degrees the rest of the night.

Before eating any food, drop it in a sandbox and lick a battery.

Mail $300 to the Reno casino of your choice.

Make a list of all the things you’ll do different next year. Never look at it.

Search alleys untill you find a couch so unbelievably tacky and nasty filthy that a state college frat house wouldn’t want it. Take a nap on the couch and sleep like you are king of the world.

Shop at Wal-mart, Cost-Co, and Home Depot until your car is completely packed with stuff. Tell everyone that you’re going to a "Leave-No-Trace" event. Empty your car into a dumpster.

Spend thousands of dollars and several months of your life building a deeply personal art work. Hide it in a funhouse on the edge of the city. Hire people to come by and alternate saying "I love it" and "this sucks balls". Blow it up.

Cut, burn, electrocute, bruise, and sunburn various parts of your body. Forget how you did it. Don’t go to a doctor.

Walk around your neighborhood and knock on doors until someone offers you cocktails and dinner.

Lean back in a chair until that point where you’re just about to fall over, but you catch yourself at the last moment. Hold that position for 9 hours.

Don’t sleep for 5 days. Take a wide variety of hallucinogenic/emotion altering drugs. Pick a fight with your boyfriend/girlfriend.

Set up a DJ system downwind of a three alarm fire. Play a short loop of drum’n'bass until the embers are cold.

Have a 3 a.m. soul baring conversation with a drag nun in platforms, a crocodile and Bugs Bunny. Be unable to tell if you’re hallucinating. Lust after Bugs Bunny.

Spend a whole year rummaging through thrift stores for the perfect, most outrageous costume. Forget to pack it.

Read "Dhalgren" by Samuel R. Delany. Read "The City Not Long After" by Pat Murphy. Cut off the bindings, throw all the pages up in the air, and shuffle them back together. Reread "The City After Dhalgren" by Samuel Murphy. Burn it. Read the ashes.

Listen to music you hate for 168 hours straight, or until you think you are going to scream. Scream. Realize you’ll love the music for the rest of your life.

Bust your ass for a "community." See all the attention get focused on the drama queen crybaby.

Get so drunk you can’t recognize your own house. Walk slowly around the block for 5 hours.

Tell your boss you aren’t coming to work this week but he should "gift" you a paycheck anyway. When he refuses accuse him of not loving the "community".

Ask your most annoying neighbor to interrupt your fun several times a day with third hand gossip about every horrible thing that’s happened in the last 24 hours. Have them wear khaki.

I love it, now THIS is a GOOD one!! Creative writing in fine form, fine work indeed. LMFO

[drucake]

love it! thanks!!!! :P

[Token]

Can't take credit. This has been floating the boards for at least 10 years that I know of, maybe longer.

[drucake]

i know, it always makes me laugh though.

[Jackass]

That shit's still funnier than a mofo...whoever composed it

[Ugly Dougly]

I got two tickets for me and my new friendgirl. Then I thought, maybe she would make me crazy camping with her, so I sold my tickets. Besides, we have some financial stuff to deal with. Now of course, I realize it would be excellent sharing Burning Man with her. So next year for sure.

[drucake]

i really hope to go next year. im really interested in what the theme will be for 2012. that should be interesting. hmmmm. im sure the over all vibe will be different for that year. any thoughts on that?

[Jackass]

maybe a mayan civilization theme??

[Fire_Moose]

I hope its "Mad Max"

[theCryptofishist]

Read "Dhalgren" by Samuel R. Delany. Read "The City Not Long After" by Pat Murphy. Cut off the bindings, throw all the pages up in the air, and shuffle them back together. Reread "The City After Dhalgren" by Samuel Murphy. Burn it. Read the ashes.

I've long thought that The City Not Long After is a very "burny" book, so it interests me to see it here.

[theCryptofishist]

i really hope to go next year. im really interested in what the theme will be for 2012. that should be interesting. hmmmm. im sure the over all vibe will be different for that year. any thoughts on that?

My thought is that we are not idiotic new agers in love with a cheesy fairy tale and that we should just burn like is 2007, or 1998, or 2003 instead of getting ourselves all worked up by deliberate misreadings of thousand year old myths.

[C.f.M.]

I haven't given up entirely, but I'm pretty much not going except for some sort of Hollywood story arc plot save.

http://playabound.wordpress.com/2010/06 ... strangers/

[flatlander13]

I only go to Burning Man every other year……..this is my planned year off.

I get really snotty and such if I go every year……….I know it’s hard to tell if I am being yet more snotty, but it is possible……….If I go 2 years in a row I end up doing stuff like stopping busses that have been made to look like boats with bands on them and yelling at them to get a fucking original idea…….things like that……it’s not pretty.

[trystanthegypsy]

I haven't given up entirely, but I'm pretty much not going except for some sort of Hollywood story arc plot save.

http://playabound.wordpress.com/2010/06 ... strangers/

1. Buy crappiest running car you can find. Put on puppy dog face. Do this near the end of the month when people need rent money.
2. Drive to burning man. Don't worry about buying any new stuff.
3. Pick up hitchikers. Fleece them for gas money.
4. Have awesome time.
5. Drive home with rich guy/girl you met on playa who will pay for all your gas money. (This kinda happened to me last year. it's a longer story than that, well my orignal car-mate ditched me to go to California, still paid her half so I would drive her stuff back, then I found another rider who paid her half. Which made my half = zero.)

6. Sell crappy car right after welfare check day. Shine it up a little. If you get a good enough deal in the first place, you could even put a little more money into it and flip it for...
7. PROFIT!!!

Alternatively, go on one of those sugar daddy websites, put up a couple "tight dress" pictures, and collect funds. Whee!

[TobeWilde]

Token! I love you! I don't care what your preferences might be - animal, human, reptile... Your list fn rocked...I cant say anything more than

(sob)

I LOVE you MAN!

[oneeyeddick]

I get really snotty and such if I go every year……….If I go 2 years in a row I end up doing stuff like stopping busses that have been made to look like boats with bands on them and yelling at them to get a fucking original idea…….things like that……it’s not pretty.

You should try it with a megaphone in one hand a fifth of Jamesons and a jar of pickles in your other hand with your dick hanging out of your fly and a piece of gorilla tape making sure it points at your belly button no matter how many times you fall down.

[C.f.M.]

I haven't given up entirely, but I'm pretty much not going except for some sort of Hollywood story arc plot save.

http://playabound.wordpress.com/2010/06 ... strangers/

1. Buy crappiest running car you can find. Put on puppy dog face. Do this near the end of the month when people need rent money.
2. Drive to burning man. Don't worry about buying any new stuff.
3. Pick up hitchikers. Fleece them for gas money.
4. Have awesome time.
5. Drive home with rich guy/girl you met on playa who will pay for all your gas money. (This kinda happened to me last year. it's a longer story than that, well my orignal car-mate ditched me to go to California, still paid her half so I would drive her stuff back, then I found another rider who paid her half. Which made my half = zero.)

6. Sell crappy car right after welfare check day. Shine it up a little. If you get a good enough deal in the first place, you could even put a little more money into it and flip it for...
7. PROFIT!!!

Alternatively, go on one of those sugar daddy websites, put up a couple "tight dress" pictures, and collect funds. Whee!

If I had money for a crappy car, I'd be half-way there. Who'd pay for the gas? And repairs, when it broke down? Plus, driving there would take me a week. Driving there, with six other people, doing shifts 24 hours a day, takes minimum 3 days. That's with stopping only for gas. Throw in a blown tire, axle troubles and the rest of the unknown - might not even get there.

If I could take a second week off from work, I'd already be driving there on an adventure with my friends. I kinda need "new stuff" like food and water.

...if I had the figure (and personality) for "tight dress pictures," I probably wouldn't need the money in the first place...

[Fire_Moose]

2 Words....Web Cam.



Personality means nothing.

[trystanthegypsy]

2 Words....Web Cam.



Personality means nothing.

And looks really don't mean that much either. Any 6+ girl can do it.

CFM, I've seen that striped dress on your blog... so don't give me that nonsense!

Sometimes I think I have a smaller image of how big the states are that they really are... (does that make sense?) It's only about 30-32 hours of driving straight through from Northern Alberta to the Playa... plus a couple hours at the border and a couple hours at wally world, heh. and a couple hours at this random riverside park that was actually green... ahhh... visited there on the way back, too, I never missed grass so much.

Was I rambling?

[C.f.M.]

"I think I have a smaller image of how big the states are that they really are"

I know what you mean. It's a big place!

2,689 miles from where I live to Gerlach. So I guess technically, if I drove NON-stop, it could be done in two days.

[Bounce530]

266 miles from my house to Girl-lack.

[Fire_Moose]

I'm only 788 Miles....wow seems like nothing when put like that...

[misfit]

bounce, ive been to paradise. not really paradise is it. ?. but down the road is chico state.

[trystanthegypsy]

1,296 miles the mountain-y curvy crappy road way, and 1,486 miles the flat-boring-go way over the speed limit in the middle of the night way. Which is the way I went last year.

That being said, I've only driven across Canada once, and it was only Calgary - Toronto (Idaho to Ohio) and that's an experience I wouldn't want to repeat.

[Bounce530]

bounce, ive been to paradise. not really paradise is it. ?. but down the road is chico state.

It's hardly what its name implies...unless you're a bay area transplant who doesn't want any kind of social life, or decent job. 7 stop lights, hills, trees, churches and retirees, that's Paradise, Ca in a nutshell. But yes, Chico is just a quick hop down the hill, and boy do I love Chico in the summer time! and the Sierra Nevada brewery.

[theCryptofishist]

bounce, ive been to paradise. not really paradise is it. ?. but down the road is chico state. :twisted:

It's hardly what its name implies...unless you're a bay area transplant who doesn't want any kind of social life, or decent job. 7 stop lights, hills, trees, churches and retirees, that's Paradise, Ca in a nutshell. But yes, Chico is just a quick hop down the hill, and boy do I love Chico in the summer time! :twisted: and the Sierra Nevada brewery.

Dang. I thought Paradise was a dump. Good thing it's not in tornado country with all those trailer parks.