Date Rape at Burning Man
- Marscrumbs
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A simple solution to "date rape" while shitfaced d
For those who like to get drunk and blackout:
Before going out on the open playa, take a felt marker and write on your tits, "If shitfaced drunk, Please do not fuck me." Then when you wake up there's no ambiguity.
Before going out on the open playa, take a felt marker and write on your tits, "If shitfaced drunk, Please do not fuck me." Then when you wake up there's no ambiguity.
- AntiM
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Re: A simple solution to "date rape" while shitfac
Oddly enough, that might even work. Don't forget your blinkies.Marscrumbs wrote:For those who like to get drunk and blackout:
Before going out on the open playa, take a felt marker and write on your tits, "If shitfaced drunk, Please do not fuck me." Then when you wake up there's no ambiguity.
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Re: A simple solution to "date rape" while shitfac
How aboutMarscrumbs wrote:For those who like to get drunk and blackout:
Before going out on the open playa, take a felt marker and write on your tits, "If shitfaced drunk, Please do not fuck me." Then when you wake up there's no ambiguity.
"I used to be a dude, and I still vote Republican"
That should cover most cases, one way or another.
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Re: A simple solution to "date rape" while shitfac
Here and there wrote:How aboutMarscrumbs wrote:For those who like to get drunk and blackout:
Before going out on the open playa, take a felt marker and write on your tits, "If shitfaced drunk, Please do not fuck me." Then when you wake up there's no ambiguity.
"I used to be a dude, and I still vote Republican"
That should cover most cases, one way or another.
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Re
Where's the delete button?
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A simple solution to "date rape" while shitfaced
Yes, definitely don't forget your blinkies. Nobody want's you to get hurt.AntiM wrote:Oddly enough, that might even work. Don't forget your blinkies.Marscrumbs wrote:For those who like to get drunk and blackout:
Before going out on the open playa, take a felt marker and write on your tits, "If shitfaced drunk, Please do not fuck me." Then when you wake up there's no ambiguity.
I think it all depends on what the definition of "blackout drunk" is. Actually passed out, blacked out, unconscious, asleep? Or awake, eyes open, moving around of your own free will, doing things that you later can't remember doing?
Many of us have had those mornings where we had to ask someone what happened last nite. Even during times when you're standing up, with your eyes open, walking around, you could be "blackout drunk" in the sense that later you won't remember any of what was occurring.
I can see how in bed with someone, in the dark, this latter definition of "blackout drunk" could cause a mistake about consent. Later, the person might not remember that their open eyes and body movements made them appear to be fully involved in affirmatively participating in the activity. And the other person could easily mistakenly believe that they wanted to move forward with it.
Obviously it's important to watch for the signs of incoherence or "awake blackout" behavior, and ask for consent verbally or just stop. But maybe it's even possible to give verbal consent and not remember doing that either.
The responsibility is on the guy (for some reason this is gender-based) to make very certain that an apparently aware, participating partner is not in "awake blackout mode". Which shouldn't be too hard to do by asking some questions. Not all guys will do this, but that doesn't necessarily make them rapists in every case. It may mean they are just stupid and not acutely "tuned in".
I'm absolutely not defending anyone who takes advantage of a person while they are actually passed out. Obviously if a woman's body is limp like a wet noodle, not reciprocating your advances with her own, she's passed out. I just want to make the distinction about different types of drunk behavior which is later forgotten, and might be confusing in the moment.
Guys who make an actual mistake about someone's consent (due to their partner appearing awake & moving like they want to proceed) are stupid, careless & unaware. Guys who knowingly take advantage are rapists.
Many of us have had those mornings where we had to ask someone what happened last nite. Even during times when you're standing up, with your eyes open, walking around, you could be "blackout drunk" in the sense that later you won't remember any of what was occurring.
I can see how in bed with someone, in the dark, this latter definition of "blackout drunk" could cause a mistake about consent. Later, the person might not remember that their open eyes and body movements made them appear to be fully involved in affirmatively participating in the activity. And the other person could easily mistakenly believe that they wanted to move forward with it.
Obviously it's important to watch for the signs of incoherence or "awake blackout" behavior, and ask for consent verbally or just stop. But maybe it's even possible to give verbal consent and not remember doing that either.
The responsibility is on the guy (for some reason this is gender-based) to make very certain that an apparently aware, participating partner is not in "awake blackout mode". Which shouldn't be too hard to do by asking some questions. Not all guys will do this, but that doesn't necessarily make them rapists in every case. It may mean they are just stupid and not acutely "tuned in".
I'm absolutely not defending anyone who takes advantage of a person while they are actually passed out. Obviously if a woman's body is limp like a wet noodle, not reciprocating your advances with her own, she's passed out. I just want to make the distinction about different types of drunk behavior which is later forgotten, and might be confusing in the moment.
Guys who make an actual mistake about someone's consent (due to their partner appearing awake & moving like they want to proceed) are stupid, careless & unaware. Guys who knowingly take advantage are rapists.
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this thread isn't dead yet?
Ok, just from a hypothetical assumption...Travis is a most normal guy and SFG were having most normal sex while her prefrontal lobes were sedated and impared. There should be a name for SFG pysch game/crime against men for using sexual denial post coital regret to villify an old friend. As a guy I often had strong post coital regrets that my penis did my thinking for me, but never accused any woman of rape or seduction. Whatever what was in SFG Harlequin novel romance head the day before or after, if she was a circumstantial participant then she is sick or evil! Crying rape to reclaim her internal face, and victorian purity only cheapens other suffering that have been honestly violated. Hypothetically speaking.
Feeling strange and used yet?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Julian_Assange
Hello, hello, can you hear us now. You are being used!
Posted as public proof......it's called out of context theater.
Hello, hello, can you hear us now. You are being used!
Posted as public proof......it's called out of context theater.
Laika and me went on a ride.
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Re: Feeling strange and used yet?
Zona wrote:http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Julian_Assange
Hello, hello, can you hear us now. You are being used!
Posted as public proof......it's called out of context theater.
THANK YOU VERY FUCKING MUCH!
This case has been proven by the females that have said they are not interested in prosecuting Julian!
This so pisses me off!
It is why I do not o out with FEMALES anymore!
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Um no
I'm just saying that this thread started before Julian Assange had the same problem, and that is what was planned.
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Charlie, why did you call the producer a Zombie again? Why is it you were hanging out with Bombshell??? Hello...funny that....a friend of...
(Cat bird)
Why is it so many people are having problems on stage and in public these days, oh gosh, why is it. Hummm....let me see....did I tell you already?
~Bill Nye
Al gore (he is in on it I'm telling ya)
Lady Gaga
Serene Branson
Christina Aguilera
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Rush (Mr Waddle top)....
The pope.....hummm, birth control, really now!!!
It's nice to have company, oh so nice, maybe someone will see us!
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49 posts.
You seem to be new around here..
Community, know each other, so you can tell.
You can't tell if I'm fucking with you or not, or may be you already know...
So what about Lindsay?
I know for a fact, and you sit there and watch, as you do the same thing.
Frame job.
Fuck you all, fuck you, for not standing up to that!!!!!!!
This is proof you are all under the control, loosers!!!!!!
Community, know each other, so you can tell.
You can't tell if I'm fucking with you or not, or may be you already know...
So what about Lindsay?
I know for a fact, and you sit there and watch, as you do the same thing.
Frame job.
Fuck you all, fuck you, for not standing up to that!!!!!!!
This is proof you are all under the control, loosers!!!!!!
Laika and me went on a ride.
You pay for this.
How can you be free when......
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All around you, all around you. You don't ask the right questions when you buy....ever been on the far side of the take?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OPXUeeFXc90
All around you, all around you. You don't ask the right questions when you buy....ever been on the far side of the take?
Laika and me went on a ride.
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treading on dangerous ground
To me, this accusation of date rape has some really negative effects. I think it trivializes actual rape, both the suffering of the victims, and makes the crime seem more normal by making it seem like something normal men do. This "rapist" may have been as drunk as the "victim", and wasn't able to give consent or know what was happening. If you don't think you can get it up in a black out state, you've never been a twenty-one year old man. If you don't think that a drunk girl rubbing up on you and snuggling seems like a consensual partner when you're wasted, then you are asking the man to do what the woman won't or can't. What we're talking about is a mistake, on the part of both people, a big one, not rape, not a violent crime by a predator, not somebody who intended or planned to violate another person. The real crime is that two people fucked up, and one of them publicly calls the other the worst kind of criminal.
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Re: treading on dangerous ground
Very well put, Uncle Sticky. Having lived through the bad old days when violent rape could be dismissed with "She was asking for it," to the madness of today when drunken hook-ups are criminalized as "He assaulted her," I hope the pendulum of public perceptions will soon settle in the middle somewhere on this issue.uncle sticky wrote:To me, this accusation of date rape has some really negative effects. I think it trivializes actual rape, both the suffering of the victims, and makes the crime seem more normal by making it seem like something normal men do. This "rapist" may have been as drunk as the "victim", and wasn't able to give consent or know what was happening. If you don't think you can get it up in a black out state, you've never been a twenty-one year old man. If you don't think that a drunk girl rubbing up on you and snuggling seems like a consensual partner when you're wasted, then you are asking the man to do what the woman won't or can't. What we're talking about is a mistake, on the part of both people, a big one, not rape, not a violent crime by a predator, not somebody who intended or planned to violate another person. The real crime is that two people fucked up, and one of them publicly calls the other the worst kind of criminal.
"BTW I'm not your wife so don't lie to me." -Ratty
