top douche bags fucktards at BM 2010

[Bounce530]

I will take it from you. And then beat you with it. Verbally. Until you cry in shame.

I can vouch for this....I'm still in the dark corner...holding my knees, rocking back and forth, crying in shame...

[motskyroonmatick]

Crap FaeTora. That's terrible!

[OatmealMama]

For my first burn, I can honestly say I didn't see one asshole. The ABSOLUTE closest one that was on the fringe of asshole-ness was the guy on the microphone near 2:00/G who woke me up on Friday morning at 8:00am with a "song" (?) with lyrics that only had one word - FUCK - In about 10 seconds, he became my hero after initially evoking a tad bit of anger inside me.

Other than that, the poor, unsuspecting couple that I asked to perform our impromptu playa wedding was super cool. Thanks!!! I realized afterwards that we were so eager to consumate our marriage that we never exchanged rings! Loved it, you are the heart of true burners!

I'm still trying to get back to my real life without daydreaming of life on the playa.

(We will be back!)

[C.f.M.]

Redneck drunks stay home.



/sniffle

But I had such a good time...

[Eric]

Redneck drunks stay home.



/sniffle

But I had such a good time...

but you're a Good redneck drunk. You better come back.

[mdmf007]

I love megaphones. A friend and I were on C between 9 and 930 heckling the red dress Hashers and got invited over to drink and sing. I met an awesome gal Named Christine, and had planned on meeting later - well got delayed with work on playa and missed her.

Without the megaphone I would have never met her, and if it were not for washing my hands after dealing with a patient, I would have been able to see more of her. Doe!

[Mosin]

Reminiscent of aformentioned vegan burrito hippie bait loser was one of my fellow 40-something males standing at the foot of the porch/house MV steps, who smiled big and said "HIIiiiiii!" (in his high-pitch nice-guy voice) as my by-all-accounts sexy wife and female friend walked aboard to check it out, but then threw out his arm to block me from the steps, leaning in and using his stern/official low dude voice to say "Sorry man, too many people onboard." I looked at the tons of room around the 7-8 people (my two pals included) casually standing there, and then back to him incredulously.
"Really?"
"Yeah, really"
So I call up to my wife, who hadn't yet noticed I wasn't behind her "Hey JaneDoe! You two had better get off the porch. This guy says there are just too many people onboard."
She looked at the dude (still with clothesline arm out blocking me) like the pathetic jerkoff he was being, and said "Oh, I get it. Let's go." The forlorn look on his face as our friend followed her off was priceless. And so we bailed... onward and upward!

I guess cool MVs don't necessarily equal cool people. Nice try though, dickhead.

[yellowpants]

The human mousetrap was awesome. We need more of this kind of stuff. I really enjoyed the process of getting trapped.

[Kinetik V]

Mosin, that story made me smile...I'd liked to have seen how far his jaw dropped when you called him out on his crap.

My experiences with art cars have been horrible, so much so that I don't even bother trying to ride any. I'll stay happy snapping a picture or two and then go find some other shiny blinky moving object to catch my attention and leave the attitude for others to deal with. The idea of art cars as mass transit in BRC...has to be one of the biggest jokes ever. The story above certainly helps to illustrate why that is.

[Mosin]

My experiences with art cars have been horrible, so much so that I don't even bother trying to ride any. I'll stay happy snapping a picture or two and then go find some other shiny blinky moving object to catch my attention and leave the attitude for others to deal with.

The above exactly encapsulates my experience/position, reinforced this year by the porch lameness. IMO the potential bad vibe just isn't worth it. On the other hand, I have enjoyed several MV rides and standing vantage points over the years that were offered... although these were all in relation to something I/we had gifted, so I still have mixed feelings. Not to be all emo about it... the vibe just isn't conducive to my trip, but they are still darn purdy to look at and skank around.

[C.f.M.]

A guy on the playa ran into me with his bike. I ried to move out of his way but he wasnt paying any atention to where he was biking so he still ended up swaying off and into me. I fell on my bad knee and it is now almost completely non-weight baring. oh well. Sai la Vie.

My friend jokingly crashed his bike into mine.

I rode on...figuring he'd catch up.

Or, he'd totally bust his bike and have to figure out how to get it back to his camp, and then be bikeless all week.

[theCryptofishist]

Sai la Vie.

Isn't that "say" the "c'est" one?
Oh, the horror of trying to spell something in a foreign language, or trying to spell something you've never seen written.

Sorry, Fae

(Sometimes I dislike myself.)

[ygmir]

Sai la Vie.

Isn't that "say" the "c'est" one?
Oh, the horror of trying to spell something in a foreign language, or trying to spell something you've never seen written.

Sorry, Fae

(Sometimes I dislike myself.)

just type this into Google:

say la vie

[C.f.M.]

It's "c'est la vie."

Ce

est

la vie

That is life, such is life, que sera, sera.

[FIGJAM]

Say la vag?

[cahlm]

all of you megaphone haters are really gonna hate my MV next year...

[ygmir]

Say la vag?

say = lick?

[CapSmashy]

I know some poor group out there is thinking one of my camp mates is the absolute biggest douche bag fucktard in existence when he scared their car away and made them leave the pedestrian only street when they were trying to leave the event.

It was an awesome bit of impromptu performance art.

[C.f.M.]

Je leche ton Chat. Nonnon, tu leche mon Chat, n'est pas? C'est la vie! J'ecoute la Radio!! CROQUE MONSIEUR!!

[ygmir]

minx...........

[Ace of Kittens]

I was shocked by the sheer number of "darkwads," both on foot and on bikes. I know they've always been there (this was my 5th Burn), but I really noticed a lot more this time around. While out biking on Wednesday night, I nearly ran into 3 people who were walking next to one another and pretty much taking up most of the road - none of them had any glow at all. Only my powerful bike light / headlamp combo saved me from plowing into them at full speed. I just don't get it.

Barring that, the only unpleasant encounter I had was a gentleman "first timer" who came to my camp for its hand-washing event, also on Wednesday. He was quite clearly "on the make" and complained that he still hadn't "gotten laid" despite being there since Monday. It was clear that he thought he was going to get some action at my camp (sorry, our 'hand jobs' don't come with a happy ending) and gave me a really skeezy sort of vibe.

Really, though, most of the people I met this year were awesome and the positive > any negative. /rosy glow[/b]

[Elorrum]

Je leche ton Chat. Nonnon, tu leche mon Chat, n'est pas? C'est la vie! J'ecoute la Radio!! CROQUE MONSIEUR!!

n'est ce pas! bien sur! Tiennes! eh bien. On peut dire va en t'onculer a ces idiots parce qu'ils sont plus stupide.

[C.f.M.]

Je leche ton Chat. Nonnon, tu leche mon Chat, n'est pas? C'est la vie! J'ecoute la Radio!! CROQUE MONSIEUR!!

n'est ce pas! bien sur! Tiennes! eh bien. On peut dire va en t'onculer a ces idiots parce qu'ils sont plus stupide.

Ah oui?



Et do yew have a massage for me?

[EmilyD]

Despite being there 11 days this year, there's really only one person on my asshole list (I don't count the DPW guys driving over the speed limit through a blinding whiteout who almost ran me over...that's expected, right?):

Barter Bob.

He tagged my art project with a sharpie, advertising his camp. He was the ONLY PERSON during the entire week to disrespect my art project with graffiti. No one else even followed his example, as sometimes happens with graffiti (sometimes once it's tagged, things become a graffiti magnet). Not this time. He was the ONLY one.

I don't care if he's an old-school Burner and gives a lot to the community. He, then, of all people, should know better than to deface art. He gets my 2010 FUCK YOU award (and a photo of the tag sent to the Burning Man organization....maybe they'll take it into consideration when he's requesting theme camp placement again next year).

The rest of it (darktards, drunks, mooching hippies, sleazy goddess-worship camps) is just expected and taken in stride. It's Burning Man. But tagging art is NOT ok.

Brody,

This is definitely shitty. I'm sorry it happened to your artwork. Agreed, it's NEVER okay to fuck with someone else's art!

[EmilyD]

A guy on the playa ran into me with his bike. I ried to move out of his way but he wasnt paying any atention to where he was biking so he still ended up swaying off and into me. I fell on my bad knee and it is now almost completely non-weight baring. oh well. Sai la Vie.

(((((((((((FaeTora))))))))))))) sorry the darkwad hit you. We can only hope he got a flat in all his tires (spares included).

[EmilyD]

I guess cool MVs don't necessarily equal cool people. Nice try though, dickhead. :lol:

It's the truth brother!!! Glad your woman stayed with you. I've met those Front Porch folks on several other occasions, and some of them are pretty damn stuck up I'm sorry to say. That attitude is definitely not in the spirit of either the Burning Man or ArtCar communities.

[robrob]

That attitude is definitely not in the spirit of either the Burning Man

To me, the spirit of Burning Man is "you want it, you bring it".

I was camped with 9 dudes and 1 chick, and saw on the first night how the art car scene was going to be when we foolishly thought about trying to get on the purple party bus. (ie: cliquish and judgemental)

As much as I think those guys were kinda shitty, if you want to make the rules/standards for your art car, you're welcome to buy/build/license one and deal with getting it to the playa and staying sober enough to drive it, etc. And I'm ok with that. I know If i built one I'd prefer people in sweet costumes and/or dancing naked chicks as opposed to a bunch of dudes hanging out.

that said, we had some good art car times. (pro tip: a single tripping bunny dancing his ass off has a lot better odds of getting past the bouncer than a group of dudes in cargo shorts, shocker!). The fishing boat was probably my personal favorite.

oh, last art car observation: while i'm sure i'll get yelled at for being unsafe etc, it's also often easier to just jump on board a moving car pirate style than to subject yourself to the humiliating scrutiny at a "scheduled stop".

[mist]

Mine is really split between two events and three people,

one for simply being a stupid weekender ignoramus with the manors of a salmonella filled taco. I had just finished body painting for about seven hours, went back to the RV got myself a red bull knock off called red rave, put it down beside my painting gear and began to pull everything apart and clean up. Well I go to reach for my unopened can of red rave, and this jack ass all but snatches it right out of my hand, and yells trade you for a beer, cracks it and drinks it right in front of me. I simply shake my head pick up the last few things and lock my paint kit up. A camp mate walks over and I hand him a beer that was gifted to the camp, he tells me to drink it, I said can’t I would get drunk off half of it. He nods and says, “ah that’s rightâ€

[Elorrum]

Je leche ton Chat. Nonnon, tu leche mon Chat, n'est pas? C'est la vie! J'ecoute la Radio!! CROQUE MONSIEUR!!

n'est ce pas! bien sur! Tiennes! eh bien. On peut dire va en t'onculer a ces idiots parce qu'ils sont plus stupide.

Ah oui?



Et do yew have a massage for me?

Et dew yew hev a lissance for yewer minkey?

[theCryptofishist]

...manors of a salmonella filled taco...

Dammit! All the other fish have real estate. Multiple real estate.
*sulk*