Fuck!

[ygmir]

Eric, wouldn't it be something if your harassed friend could turn around and fucking cap all those assholes?

*fucking scratchin my head*

Not nearly as bad as what K is going through, but a friend in Boston was just chased down an alley on his bike into a waiting crowd of 6 "people" yelling anti-gay slurs. One grabbed at his handlebar but he was able to get away, and there was a cop about a block away. He's not sure if they caught any of them.

oh, I fuckin knew the reference, I am just confused, by Dougly advocating deadly force............

And, I'd agree, if life is threatened, used deadly force to fuckin protect yourself.


Just confused me, that, someone who usually champions gun controls and restrictions, would suggest as such.

[Eric]

Eric, wouldn't it be something if your harassed friend could turn around and fucking cap all those assholes?

When you're frantically biking down a small alley trying to avoid being bashed, I don't think pulling a gun was the first thing on his mind. Not ending up in the fucking hospital or worse was.

Besides, he probably would have been outgunned 6 to one, and sadly unlike a lot of youth, he actually does care if he dies or not. He doesn't see it as a point of honor.

He's changed his route to avoid that area.

[ygmir]

Eric, wouldn't it be something if your harassed friend could turn around and fucking cap all those assholes?

When you're frantically biking down a small alley trying to avoid being bashed, I don't think pulling a gun was the first thing on his mind. Not ending up in the fucking hospital or worse was.

Besides, he probably would have been outgunned 6 to one, and sadly unlike a lot of youth, he actually does care if he dies or not. He doesn't see it as a point of honor.

He's changed his route to avoid that area.

how fucked up is it, that, due to who you decide to sleep with (and/or love), you can get hurt.

fuckin bad enough here, imagine in the middle east.

fuckin humans.

sometimes, "I quit"...........I just hope Zera and Cornelius will find me, not Dr. Zaeus.

[Kinetik V]

I hate to clog up the fuck thread...and I know I've been told the eplaya is not a place to get legal / medical / insert advice type of your choice here. But I've got a problem...and I need some outside perspective.

I've posted in here that my mom's lymphoma came back. She went in last week for three days of chemo after finally getting the all clear to do so. Everything seemed to be going well, I talked to her on the phone several times and she was weak as to be expected but otherwise nothing out of the ordinary.
Early Monday morning I get a call that in the middle of the night she had fallen out of her bed onto the floor, and my dad couldn't get her up so he had to call the paramedics. They get her up, all seems back to normal until 11 am when I get a call that she had some kind of reaction to the chemo, 911 got called again and the paramedics transported her to the hospital.

Next update I get is that she's in CCU....and is on full life support. Her breathing has stopped, she's got internal bleeding...and the staff tells my sister and my two aunts that she is the sickest patient in the hospital. Their words, not ours. Slowly she has pulled back from the brink. They got the internal bleeding stopped. But here's where it gets interesting. The doctors / oncologist have verbally admitted they screwed up and gave her too strong of chemo dosages. It literally wiped out her immune system. Previously unknown stomach / internal problems had no immune system to keep them in check and it almost caused her to bleed out.

So now here we are this morning. She's still considered critical in CCU. They've got her blood pressure stable again. She's had numerous blood and platelet transfusions to get to this point. She's making facial gestures and barely moving her hands, but she's still not conscious where she can speak. She can't breathe on her own, they try and take the ventilator off and they have to put it back on. I just learned they will try again tomorrow but if not...she gets a trachea tube. I'm sitting 500 miles away here in Denver absofuckinglutely freaked out.

I don't know what to do. Part of me wants to push my lazy fucking dad to hire an attorney and see if we could sue their socks off. They essentially almost killed her with their fuckup and she's still not out of the proverbial woods. On top of all the other shit I've already posted about this has been about all I can fucking handle...2 weeks of a continuing mess.

I don't want sympathy....what I'm looking for here by dumping this on the board is suggestions. Got any? Essentially what I'm hoping for is something that might point me in the right direction on how to proceed and show me some options my emotionally fucked up mind can't see at the moment. Hell at this point I'll even take snarky posts...firing me up might be what I need to clear my head and figure out if legal asskicking is the way to go.

[gyre]

Not my area, but it might be a reasonable medical mistake, ie part of normal medical calculation.
If not, if it's a labeling or accidental dosage problem, it would certainly be actionable.

The only thing an attorney would do now is make sure information is protected, so it might be worth looking into for that reason.
Getting advice off the record from another doctor might give you a better idea of how bad the error was.
The web is useful for that.
Or just ask in another city.

Do you have the names of the people that told you that?
Keep handwritten records.

I think you might need to talk to an attorney just to make sure you cover things that might get lost.

Very hard to sue with out tort system though.

[Kinetik V]

This is not the first time they've screwed up. 7 years ago when we went through Round 1 they overdosed her then too. But she rebounded fast and we didn't push the issue.

The fact that this is the second time even though 7 years have passed...same oncologist treated her before, same facilities and all that...my thought is this shouldn't have happened.

And since this is the fuck thread, it's snowing like a mad fucking crazy 1 hour away. Chain law is up for Vail Pass and the Eisenhower Tunnel but still...no snow here. I would love to see our elk herd in the snow....hell just any snow would be welcome so the fire bans could be lifted. This place is a fucking tinderbox. And taking the camera out would be a great distraction!

[theCryptofishist]

Okay, this "they messed up 7 years ago, and now they did it again" thing quite possibly sinks any chance of a law suit succeeding. No harm in having a consult, but someone is going ot have to get up in court and say "well, yes, they did do this before, but I thought they knew better now, so we didn't go to someone else." I'm not a lawyer, but I can't see that flying. Also, it seems to me that most of the time you have to sign paperwork that says you'll submit to binding arbitration rather than sue. Maybe that's the local medical microclimate, but maybe its all over the country, too. IF you do go that route, the less said about it on the internet, the better.

You've been under a lot of stress. Take care of yourself first, to the extent that you can. I don't know what the statute of limitations for medical malpractice is, but you have at least six months. So you don't have to do that now. If you need to stay where you are, stay where you are, if you need to see her, get on a plane already.

Sometimes life is beyond hard. Sometimes it is a bleak march down a cold tunnel with poor lighting and a slippery floor. The choice is to sit
Sorry, you didn't want that crap.

It sounds very difficult. You can only do your best.

Edited for fuck, fuck, fuck, cufk, fuck.

[gyre]

Many of the things we are asked to sign, especially in hospitals, are not binding and often illegal.

I have crossed out entire sections of hospital admission forms and never had a complaint about it.
They know very well what they are doing.

A contract is only a contract when it is enforced in court.
An attorney is needed to tell you what your rights are.

[Kinetik V]

It's also a bad idea to go legal when she's in CCU and needing care without the staff worrying about attorneys breathing down their neck. At the same time...having to go through Round 2 you start thinking that something needs to be done. If she had better insurance this would not have been a problem...but as it stands our choices existed of go here, do this, or don't get coverage at all. Dammed if you do, dammed if you don't.

It's just a fucking mess...they're going to heal her up just to do more chemo...makes you wonder if it's all worth it sometimes but as long as she keeps fighting then I fight too. But I know she doesn't want to be stuck on life support either...and then there's the whole quality of life issue coming up if things don't improve at the two week mark and the family fight that will bring on...anyway...I'm borrowing trouble and I need to stop that.

I definitely appreciate the outside points of view on this.

We now return to less dramatic rants in the fuck thread!

Oh and Gyre, you raised some very good points that I'm already starting to look into about those forms.

[busgypsy]

*fucking scratchin my head*[/quote]

HEAD! Who said HEad! I'll take some of that! And I did and it was good and there was much rejoicing! And then we fucked, we fucked for hours uprooting trees and shrubs and flowers. And then we fucked again this time like vikings with horns on our heads uurrrggghh! Head who said head! We don't want women with good taste! We want women that taste good!

[AntiM]

Fuck K, what they said. I have nothing pertinent to add. Do take care of yourself.

[Kinetik V]

Thought I would post a good update....about 45 min ago I learned that my mother's bleeding has been completely stopped and she is fully breathing on her own. Her blood pressure is still a bit high but that's manageable. She's still sedated though...maybe tomorrow she will be able to speak again.

All in all, some much welcome news to end the first not seriously fucked weekend I've had for awhile.

[cowboyangel]

What's her name Kinetic? If I can pray for the SF Giants I can pray for her recovery.

[ygmir]

fuckin good news, KV!!
yay for anything positive.

[Deb Prothero]

Fuck, YEAH.

YES, today in court, I finally felt I was heard.

The justice called the situation a stalemate refusing to make a
decision on a motion by my former husband and ordered us to go to trial to hear witnesses. He said I know what you're going to say and I know what he's going to say and I can't tell which to believe.

I've been asking for witnesses to support my statements of truth for weeks now. I can hardly wait to go to trial.

I feel so much relief at this moment... - who wants to dance!!!

[cowboyangel]

Good Luck Deb.

[ibdave]

good fucking news KV....

[Mojojita]

KV - that's great FUCKING news - but I would certainly insist on making the hospital bring in a well known, well respected oncologist to consult and make recommendations as a result of their fucking repeated screw ups. It is the fucking least they can do.

[AntiM]

Fuck, the realtor wants to do a showing of dad's house, It is still full of crap and is filthy as hell. Everyone is like, oh, just have a charity come and take everything away. Fuck, it all has to be sorted out, "charities" don't just come to your fucking house and clean it out. And no, a dozen strong guys can't just put it all in a fucking trailer and take it to the dump, there's fucking family stuff buried in layers all through the mountain of crap.

Fuck, I hate my family, the ones who can help are too busy or too tired. A few have legitimate reasons they ca't help, oh, like a broken leg and a new baby. But can anyone spend an hour or so up there with me after work? No. But they sure as shit can haul away what they want and leave the trash and mundane crap in piles on the floor.

Fuck.

[pinemom]

Fuck AntiM!!!

Do it burner style....start loading up trash bags...tell each family member in order to take one thing they need to take a trash bag.....

2 things...2 trash bags!

4 things 4 trash bags!


so on and so forth!

[ygmir]

fuckin brilliant , Piney.

[theCryptofishist]

Only if you can Fcuking trust these bozos to knwo the difference between moop and schwag, or even not to stuff the trash bag with schwag, leaving her with the moop.

[AntiM]

It isn't the3 fucking hauling away, it is the fucking loading up which sucks.

We were up there today. Someone had turned on the basement shower, which has not been used in decades because the stall is a POS made of plywood and not waterproof. The faucets don't urn off, it was just hanging down, spraying the floor; the wood had soaked through, and there is standing water in the bathroom and soaked all the way around the base of the stairs and wall. Fuck, don't know if it was Marvin or my stupid brother, but now I will have to call disaster clean up. I just can't handle it. I had to call Ogden City to come and turn off the main water valve in the driveway. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

I did find a bunch of dad's B&W mounted photos from Japan. Lovely. I don't have places to hang them, so I have quality wayward art this year.

[knowmad]

I feel ya Anti-m
Sorting through all that is hard, after mom died my sister was alone to sort through things, some of which we should have never found out. legal papers accusing a family member of rape, touching letters from lovers un-opened. sad things.

namaste


My Fuck-all-moment.
the shadow in the checkup scan says, I'm not out of the woods yet.
and my liver says it really can't handle any more anticoagulants. kinda glad my nerves are shot, wouldn't want to be around if they caught wind of this.

[Ugly Dougly]

Right you are, knowmad.
There's a sort of low-grade fucking depression that sets in when you're dealing with a dear departed's memory-laden things. After Toshi passed, I just laid inert and stared at her collections. None of her friends and family had the strength to come go through it with me.

Fortunately for me, the stepson threw me out of the house, after I glommed on to her jewelry and a few other keepsakes. Let them deal with the aftermath.

AntiM, maybe you can throw a burner party?

[AntiM]

Fuck, everyone is so busy with their own lives.

[knowmad]

Fuck, everyone is so busy with their own lives.

not true.
and if you really believed that, you wouldn't post here. you are tired and neglected, we care, we are busy with care. hang in there honey.

[ygmir]

fuck, knowmad.......I hope you're ok..........
none of what you describe sounds good............

fuckin hugs, hang in there, yourself.

[Kinetik V]

Fuck, everyone is so busy with their own lives.

True enough but we're not so busy that we can't care about others. I wish I was in Utah and could help you out....but I'm 800 miles away. My wishes for things to go better is all I can offer and I'll offer them up every day until things improve.

[Mojojita]

Fucking A Knowmad - well said. We care about you too and I will send prayers for you out into the ether.....

AntiM - I hope you know what a loving service you are doing for your dad. I think when I die my kids will light a match and walk away.