favorite lines heard at bm2k4

vulgaris · Post by **vulgaris** » Thu Sep 09, 2004 7:57 pm

"Vincent Price is a SOLID DOG. You wouldn't even want to fuck with him."

cornelius · Post by **cornelius** » Thu Sep 09, 2004 8:22 pm

Robot talking to a crowd of burners Sat. night about 4 a.m.:

"I JUST GOT HERE. DID THEY BURN THE MAN YET?"

jackstraw · Post by **jackstraw** » Thu Sep 09, 2004 9:52 pm

Twenty something goddess to 50 something guy after he had sucked dry her offered breast & nipple of pickle juice: "Ah, you do that so well, where did you ever learn how to do that?"

"Ignore Alien Orders!"

Lysergic · Post by **Lysergic** » Fri Sep 10, 2004 12:02 am

haha Cornelius, that robot kicked ass, I must've walked by right before/after you did cause he was still confused if it had burned or not. Awesome shit!

JezebelinHell · Post by **JezebelinHell** » Fri Sep 10, 2004 12:48 am

cornelius wrote:Said by one of the idiots camped next to us while pointing to his "art car". (which was obviously 4 erect penis towers around a center stage/cage.

"...yeah...those are COCKS! huh huh huh".

Hey, we nicknamed that camp Camp Daterape and referred to the car as The Daterapemobile all week. Glad someone else found them to be morons as well.

dapete · Post by **dapete** » Fri Sep 10, 2004 1:07 am

JezebelinHell wrote:From the yahoo camped next to us (said from the driver's side window of his Escapade): "You see that rim? It's 27 inches...there's another one on the other side."
And I swear to god he was dead serious.

I'm pretty sure I sat next to this guy on an art car Sunday night.

janegerous · Post by **janegerous** » Fri Sep 10, 2004 5:01 am

Overheard this from my first burn in 1998---
"I don't know what they're putt'in in this water, but it sure is work'in!"---
Loved it so much were stiill quoting it seven burns later! :lol:

DJ Yossi · Post by **DJ Yossi** » Sat Sep 11, 2004 6:46 pm

After making out with a beautiful girl for a couple minutes, she turned to me and asked,

"What was your name again?"

It was adorable.

emily sparkle · Post by **emily sparkle** » Sat Sep 11, 2004 7:07 pm

"your playa name is ROB!"

and

"do you think dpw will turn down the barking dogs if we go over there?"

1341 · Post by **1341** » Sat Sep 11, 2004 9:26 pm

Overheard riding by a group between the man and esplanade...

"...but he's a really nice guy. Do we have to talk about the fact that he has crabs?"

rodent · Post by **rodent** » Mon Sep 13, 2004 7:29 am

While waiting to leave on monday, the line for Exodus was stopped for over an hour. One of our playa virgins just looked to the sky and bellowed

"Holy Shit!!! Were stuck in a traffic jam IN THE FUCKING DESERT!!!"

---
rodent (putting the eek in geek)

dcphoto · Post by **dcphoto** » Mon Sep 13, 2004 1:14 pm

From Cowboy Bob

1. 'Don't bring nuthin' to the playa you care about'
2. 'My daddy always told me, if it's got tires or tits it's gonna be nuthin' but trouble.'

DC

Chai Guy · Post by **Chai Guy** » Mon Sep 13, 2004 1:46 pm

Said in all seriousness by a naked man painted blue, sporting a mohawk and a large bone through his nose:

"Yeah, I don't really like going over to that camp, there are too many weird people there".

cabiria · Post by **cabiria** » Mon Sep 13, 2004 5:33 pm

the perimeter of the man's ruins on Sunday night:

"Careful, if you're barefoot, there're sharp things in there!"

Discosybil · Post by **Discosybil** » Mon Sep 13, 2004 10:21 pm

"I'm such a slut" evil laugh

polykarmatic · Post by **polykarmatic** » Tue Sep 14, 2004 4:33 pm

Our wonderful neighbor, Tim purchased a very, very nice new tent for his German Dance Club Theme Camp, I mean a really nice tent. As 6 of us were struggling to get it set up, Tim the owner of the new structure related to us how the guy who sold it too him assured him it was just a "2 man 2 hour Set up"

We kidded Tim all week about the 2 Men 2 Hours thing...but I have to say when the wind and dust kicked up it was a damn nice tent to be inside...

Thanks Tim

QuasiPseudo · Post by **QuasiPseudo** » Tue Sep 14, 2004 4:54 pm

"SIT DOWN!! This is a FUCKING SACRED EVENT, ASSHOLE!!!"

Guess where this was "overheard"...

I used quotes on overheard because it was damn near impossible NOT to hear it. Apparently the self-righteous moron mistook my head for a magaphone as she screamed at someone standing about 200 feet away.

CyberHippy · Post by **CyberHippy** » Tue Sep 14, 2004 5:07 pm

Thursday morning just after sunrise, walking through the back of camp (The Embassy), young female:

"Do you know where the music is coming from?"

I pointed in several directions.

"I hope I find them - I'd really like to get a full night of sleep sometime this weekend"

One of the best laughs I had all week...

KellY · Post by **KellY** » Tue Sep 14, 2004 6:01 pm

Story I heard from Gate, a few days before opening. When driver a pickup that shows up with nothing a but a friend and a couple of bicycles is told they can't come in early, and that tickets aren't on sale yet, and that when they are will cost $300 (or whatever they're charging driveups nowadays), driver replies:

"This is a hella wrong rave!"

To which Gatekeeper Pearl answers: "Yes. Yes it is."

And after relaying the story of waking up alone on a table at the DPW Depot after the Parade, still foully drunk and freezing my ass off:

"Oh, you weren't alone. Everyone else was just passed out in the trucks."

tisha2 · Post by **tisha2** » Wed Sep 15, 2004 3:18 pm

Two guys were heading somewhere and one said,
"Dude, isn't your girlfriend coming?",
to which the other replied,
"Nah, she's at JiffyLube."

cowboyangel · Post by **cowboyangel** » Wed Sep 15, 2004 3:26 pm

shoot I almost forgot this one.....said the tough looking spike haired blonde to a bunch of guys standing around the outside of the Thunderdome, "...does any chickenshit guy here wanna get their ass kicked?" no one volunteered, and yes, that meant me too......

tisha2 · Post by **tisha2** » Fri Sep 17, 2004 1:11 pm

Oh, yeah - and while working at the Volunteer Desk in the cafe
I got lots of stupid questions, but this was the topper:

"Where's the ATM?"

ummm....

cowboyangel · Post by **cowboyangel** » Fri Sep 17, 2004 6:07 pm

can't reveal my source, but here goes
"I'm not who everyone thinks I am, I used to work for the CIA and my entire identity is fake"....ooooo ok

swear on a stack of Bibles (Koran's, Gitas, Lotus Sutras Mom's Apple Pie)...this is true

rodent · Post by **rodent** » Fri Sep 17, 2004 8:49 pm

Recently posted on the Rangers list (posters' name witheld to protect the un-innocent)

---
rodent (putting the eek in geek)

==================================================================
C L U B T O P 5
Contains live cultures.
==================================================================

September 15, 2004

NOTE FROM CHRIS:

The Burning Man Festival is "an annual art festival
and temporary community based on radical self-expression
and self-reliance in the Black Rock Desert of Nevada."
In reality, though, it's pretty much a big, dusty rave.

Here's more info: http://www.burningman.com

The Top 13 Things Overheard at the Burning Man Festival

13> "You make the mud tacos and I'll inflate the walrus!"

12> "You can call it a Port-a-Potty if you like, but I call it
performance art."

11> "Wait, you're a former dot-com programmer who lost his
job and decided to drive around the country aimlessly?
No way! Me, too!"

10> "No kidding? *I* like Nader, too!"

9> "So when you compare the avant-garde work of El Lissitzky with
the 'transatlantic' paintings of Piet Mondrian, one is drawn
to... Dude! Naked chicks in the mud pit! Woo-hoo!"

8> "Bummer, man. But then, that's the risk you take at a
clothing-optional barbecue."

7> "All those in favor of changing the name to 'Burning Person,'
please so signify."

6> "No, you want the Burning and Itching Man Festival.
Just head toward Vegas -- you can't miss it."

5> "This thing is getting too cushy -- they even provided a hole
to use as a toilet this year."

4> "Put that cigarette out! This is a no-smoking fire zone!"

3> "Does this exposed penis make me look fat?"

2> "I've reached my inner dung beetle this year!"

and Topfive.com's Number 1 Thing
Overheard at the Burning Man Festival...

1> "We are here to service the physical, spiritual, emotional
and psychic needs of our astro-travelling clientele --
and sell cold beer for three-fifty a can."

[ The Top 5 List www.topfive.com ]
[ Copyright 2004 by Chris White ]

bucky · Post by **bucky** » Sat Sep 18, 2004 8:37 am

"so we've determined that our giant tent sleeps 13, but only smokes 11"

- anonymous campmate

madmatt · Post by **madmatt** » Sat Sep 18, 2004 10:44 am

THeCrazzyman wrote:
Dork wrote:"Dude, are we on Earth right now?"

We were camped on Earth and 4:45. We got that one all day.

- "Where are we?"
- "Earth"
- "Bwahahahaha, yukyukyuk"
- "Yes, jes keep a movin folks"

tisha2 · Post by **tisha2** » Fri Sep 24, 2004 8:42 pm

one more classic...

Sunday morning a campmate popped his head out of his tent and shouted,

"DUDE! That was the best Reggae on the River *EVER*!"

cornelius · Post by **cornelius** » Fri Sep 24, 2004 10:03 pm

Sorry, not Twenty Oh four, but my Wirgin burn way back in '96 -

Night of the burn, two nervous fellaz dressed in full on Nun habits and garb carrying top o' the line camera equiptment:

"Dood, when they chant, "burn the media", just drop the cameras and RUN!!!"

PetsUntilEaten · Post by **PetsUntilEaten** » Sat Sep 25, 2004 1:15 am

campmate one: "you wanna go to centercamp & get some chai."

campmate two: "yeah!"

campmate one: "so go then."

repeat endlessly.

Mister Jellyfish Mister · Post by **Mister Jellyfish Mister** » Sat Sep 25, 2004 9:07 am

Things I said that made me feel particularly clever:

"So it goes..."
"Calo Calay"

At the burn to down-in-front photographers:
"Stop trying to freeze time!"

At the temple burn to laser-pointer ass-clowns:
"Mini-Me, stop humping the laser!"

favorite lines heard at bm2k4

hi

i've got two

Heard at Happy Camp

A ranger, yelling to the crowd while patrolling

Two Men, Two Hours--- ya right

my boss said...

one more...

Clever me