Top Asshats of 2011 Burning Man

[oneeyeddick]

Would have been a better story if he only had one eye.

[moonrise]

One of them is writing a book. Seems, The story has just begun(??!!)
I'm guesssing it'll be a well..guess we'll have to wait and see, haha...

[FeetOfClay]

somewhere, way back in the first few pages of this thread, someone nominated "the guy who pissed on the girl who was dancing at the temple", but no further info was given...

it has me shaken and nervous, paranoid that anywhere I go in BRC, anything I do in BRC, people will try to pee on me.

that really cool Sari I bought at the thrift store to wear on the Playa? scratch that; urine will stain the fabric...
that nude performance art Butoh dance piece I was planning to spontaneously break out in center camp? that's just inviting golden showers...

anyone have more info on the temple-pissing asshat?

[lucky420]

I really don't think there is a pissing on people epidemic at burning man. It could happen at just about any big event. I wouldn't worry about it to much...

[FIGJAM]

Leave the urinal costume at home!

[junglesmacks]

I really don't think there is a pissing on people epidemic at burning man. It could happen at just about any big event. I wouldn't worry about it to much...

Why oh why do I have a bad feeling that this statement may come back to bite you when you least expect it??


*tinkle*tinkle*

[ygmir]

just don't stand below the stage, looking like a baby bird waiting to be fed.

[FeetOfClay]

just don't stand below the stage, looking like a baby bird waiting to be fed.

LOVE this! laughing really hard...

how would one put this in the vernacular of E-Playa again?
"+100"?

Or is that only for snarky stuff rather than just damn hilarious stuff (like the above quote).

YMGIR, should we ever meet on the playa, I will walk up to you chirping.
But then again, how will i ever recognize people I only know from e-playa?

[FeetOfClay]

ooops, meant to type "YGMIR", not YMGIR

[ygmir]

just don't stand below the stage, looking like a baby bird waiting to be fed.

LOVE this! laughing really hard...

how would one put this in the vernacular of E-Playa again?
"+100"?

Or is that only for snarky stuff rather than just damn hilarious stuff (like the above quote).

YMGIR, should we ever meet on the playa, I will walk up to you chirping.
But then again, how will i ever recognize people I only know from e-playa?

I'm pretty easy to recognize.

[lucky420]

lucky420 wrote:
I really don't think there is a pissing on people epidemic at burning man. It could happen at just about any big event. I wouldn't worry about it to much...

junglesmacks
Why oh why do I have a bad feeling that this statement may come back to bite you when you least expect it??


*tinkle*tinkle*

Ok thats it! I'm bringing my rain poncho

[TomServo]

just don't stand below the stage, looking like a baby bird waiting to be fed.

hehe..like this?

[theCryptofishist]

Hey! I was at that rave! Just not near the stage--you don't see a fish in that see of baby birds.

[Simon of the Playa]

i'm backstage shoveling worms to the crowd.



gummy worms....duh...


im a candy raver, remember?

[ygmir]

Hey! I was at that rave! Just not near the stage--you don't see a fish in that see of baby birds.

perhaps they're seagulls?

[ygmir]

i'm backstage shoveling worms to the crowd.



gummy worms....duh...


im a candy raver, remember?

*checks zipper*

[TomServo]

Hey! I was at that rave! Just not near the stage--you don't see a fish in that see of baby birds.

you must have been at the bar when the first pic was taken...

[ygmir]

Hey! I was at that rave! Just not near the stage--you don't see a fish in that see of baby birds.

you must have been at the bar when the first pic was taken...

hahaha great one TS!! that fish should be saying " OH NO!! Mr. Billllllllllllllll".

[theCryptofishist]

Ah yes, finally smushing my way through all those pinfeathers. I still itch when I think about it...

[moonrise]

somewhere, way back in the first few pages of this thread, someone nominated "the guy who pissed on the girl who was dancing at the temple", but no further info was given...

it has me shaken and nervous, paranoid that anywhere I go in BRC, anything I do in BRC, people will try to pee on me.

that really cool Sari I bought at the thrift store to wear on the Playa? scratch that; urine will stain the fabric...
that nude performance art Butoh dance piece I was planning to spontaneously break out in center camp? that's just inviting golden showers...

anyone have more info on the temple-pissing asshat?

That was me and mine on my mini disabled person's funkyfied moonmobile. It wasn't horrendous...she was dressed too lightly for night time (wearing a skimpy dress, this was MY first concern, no warm clothes and far from her camp!!) Anyway, some guy whipped it out and pissed on her legs while they were dancing in a crowd on the open playa. What a creepy dude, ugh! he musta been high/drunk.

We casually met her, got to chit chatting and she told us what occured. We were all humorously shocked, laughed a bit and then drove her, wrapped in a blanket, back to her camp where she was able to wash up and get into warmer clothes. This being pissed on thing while dancing is NOT common out there, lol, we are civilized. Graidawg posted the story and he doesn't mention details because I think it was his first year and it's difficult to remember who what when...it truly is (and why I bring a camera so I can remember the Ws for myself).

The "victim" lived. I'm sure she's happy and thriving out there in the world somewhere. She has quite a strange story to tell (don't we all or you will soon) do not fear. It was just a strange rude wtf? She never asked for a golden shower. And I ain't going there...

So that's that.

I still think CR takes the cake, at least recently...OMFG...how can one be so kewl? Hahaha....the lingo alone has me roaring in laughter!!

Who's next..........?

[Simon of the Playa]

Moonrise, your story only re-inforces my natural inclination to carry around an electric cattle prod at all times when on the playa...


30,000 volts goes right upstream if you know what i mean...

[moonrise]

It was a strange evening...and she was HAWT. The guy was a, I don't know, a fullblown kook? I'm sure *prodding* would've cured him... the little prick, haha...

[Bob]

It's a five-square-mile drunk tank, but there's still a chance I.P. Freely is going to land one on you.

[moonrise]

Let me get this straight....if I feel rain drops as I'm putting around, it could be coming from a viewing platform or any other various high points? Maybe all those parasols and umbrellas aren't just for fashion and sun protection... How much does a cattle prod cost anyway?

Seriously, asshattery like this unbalances the female to male population, so cut it out to all the piss boys, sheesh!

[gyre]

A car coil works a treat for this.

[CitizenRandom]

Daaaaaang...I never knew. Oddness beyond oddness.

May we see excerpts from your book CR? Please include new and unique lingo for our Lexicon will ya? [could be good!]

I still think Sav was stumped (the armless ex was NOT or WAS in jail, I think?) might need a re-do Sav, but uh worried about your safety...

Fishy impressed and/or pissed off...(?!)

Who is on Hippy medication?

Carless ACLU lawyers...the recession really is cutting deep.

You won, exploded someones brains, confounded many, got called out for hanging with idiots, and much much more...fun asshat post for sure.

Ya know CR you sure have the best damned pancakes I've ever seen!!

Ouch..I must be dangling some wild participles... For the record...I didnt go with my ex-!! Yikes! Did you see or smell this guy? Jeezus frickin tap dancing christo! Never was familiar...which makes it worse and yeas apparently I do hang out with ass hats..I got an inoculation for this and these troubles do not plague me further..

[CitizenRandom]

And YES..... My Pancakes brng all the boys to the yard...

[moonrise]

CR, if you were to entertain one of us boys in Reno, I fear said boy would maybe die? Oh the places you must know and go in Drano...I'm shaking. No shit. Gaaah!

[Fire_Moose]

to the Jack hole fucktard assclown hippy who gifted me and some campers from The ACLU a ride to the burn Monday and didnt have a ticket
then couldnt find a ticket after dumping us off and we returned the truck-
then for trying to outsmart the Gate by lying his way in and saying he was my fucking husband (shudder)
Getting me sucked into some nasty business that resulted in me getting arbitrarily thrown out on Friday nite for knowing him via a ride to BRC
and for NOT getting eatin by coyotes after getting me ejected and humiliated after all the stress I had endured finding a REAL and LEGAL face value ticket-
Next time wear a meat suit when you go night jogging off to Gerlach from 13 mile for running outta gas - dressed in nothing but a headlamp, appologies and faked tears.

OH!

And for the female ranger who was elected to eject me- Throwing the burner out with the bathscum..evoking the new policy for gate breeching by repeatedly saying
" Ummmm UNFORTUNATLY...." like 52 times ..like a skipping cd. It was obviously part of the ranger training for such an instance but common seriously.. Ive been going for 13 years Im bigger than this- everytime you said
" Ummmm yeah UNFORTUNATLY" it was like a punch in the face. I had been there for five days- it was friday- he was NOT my problem
AND whats worse
She tells me infront of a croud of shocked burners that I can at least stay till the Horse burns and then when they all disperse reverses her position and trys to rush me thru breaking my camp in the dark- Im disabled and she just insists I hurry along because
SHE IS OFF SHIFT IN A MINUTE AND WANTS TO GO WATCH THE HORSE BURN........! wow. tackless bitch huh?

AS I was wrapping my head around how to deal with this issue- she was pounding UMMmmm UNFORTUNATLY like a Manson follower mantra into my head..
I get to camp and she sits there watching me break camp in the dark- Im disabled and shes RUSHING ME.
while reciting the" Ummm Unfortunatly"...new policy which includes ejecting all the people in the ride along with the perpetrator...
Then she apparently cant be bothered to walk over to the next camp and retreive the two other members I rolled in with- But
maybe it had to do with the fact she didnt have the stones to toss out
The two lawyers from'the ACLU...
doublestandard much?
Its okay...Im not bitter- theres always more Burningman- I had one of the most bestest times ever even if it was only for the 5 days..
best in three outta 12-
I feel pretty descent about the whole " UNFORTUNATE" circumstance..actually. made for a great t-shirt and a captivating story at all the d-coms.. just another experiance...which is better than no experiance at all I say.

DAMN! I'd love to hear the otehr side of this!!!! and the drivers side, what a cak

[Fire_Moose]

All resposes were spot on. LOL!