What would you do if this happened to you?

[Lex-Leo]

Hello,
I have a story to tell, unfortunatley it's a very true story. Back in early February my girlfriend and I registered in the BM ticket lottery and didn't win. A friend that we were going to share our burn with did win, but the whole ticket fiasco left her disenchanted with BM so she decided to "Gift" her 2 tickets to us. We were stunned to say the least. I have never recieved such an awesome gift, nevermind that we had known this person less than 90 days at this point. We graciously accepted her "gift", even offered to pay face her value for the tickets on more than one occaision. She always declined, and repeatedly told us to go all out and make our first burn a great one. So we stopped offering to pay for the tickets as she asked, and began spending almost every extra penny we have on preparing for our BM 2012 adventure. We bought material made some badass outfits, bought a hexyurt, began work on my first ever attempt at an interactive art installation, attended many regional events, and basically dove into the "Burner Community" headfirst. So we are thinking we are doing pretty good, we have a budget for food, fuel, ice, water, and other consumables, moneys tight but we are as prepared as we can be for our first Burning Man with less than 70 days to go. Anyways the person who "Gifted" us our tickets calls us sunday night to tell us about her trip to Vegas, and "oh by the way, BM tickets are coming soon, I need you guy's to give me face value for them." My girlfriend was on the phone with her at the time, she was stunned and didn't know what to say, so she just said "we will see what we can work out".
I didn't write this story to try and get attention, or as a sob story to try and get money. I wrote it because I would really like some feedback from the community, and I'm hoping that maybe someones differing perspective might set me in the right direction on how to delicatley deal with this issue. Delicacy is something I'm not very good at, brute force in your face type reactions are what comes most naturally for me. So if you read this, and you have an opinion, please share. Thankyou
Lex-Leo

[Simon of the Playa]

ill pay face value for them if you dont want them...



be thankful you have that opportunity




and no more dubstep, please...

[SquirrelHead]

I would find a way to come up with the $ and be happy to have the tickets. The situation sucks a little but you still get to go. Make a note of this for future dealings with her.

[Lex-Leo]

@ Simon, I don't have that opportunity, I could have afforded to buy them back in Feb, but since she said she didn't want money for them we spent our ticket $ on other BM supplies. Now with 67 days until the gates open, we can't afford another $650 for tickets. If she would have taken the money back in Feb that would have worked, because we could have adjusted our gear and plans, money spent on art, ect to be able to go, maybe a little rougher, but we would still be there. It's hard to adjust now that BM is just around the corner. Oh and BTW, She needs the $ ASAP because she has a 30 country world tour planned for early August. I feel like she blew too much partying in Vegas, so now she wants to sell us her "gift" to compensate.

[Simon of the Playa]

deal with it..


i would start washing dishes at night, mowing lawns and making pizza instead of wasting time here.


either that or beg borrow or steal it.


complaining will do you no good.

[H.G.Crosby]

sucking dick works if you're into that...



just dont spend it on crack.

[Roberto Dobbisano]

remember that movie with demi moore where the rich guy buys some dudes fiance for the evening for a price....

[shykat]

If you stood with a sign at a freeway off ramp from now till the burn ,you would make it for sure. Go in credit card debit,,, JUST GO.........

[Simon of the Playa]

Kids these days.


No radical self reliance.


Get to it, sell yer shit, sell yer mom, hey lemme know if yer selling yer mom BTW i want right of first refusal.

[knowmad]

Bank of Mom and Dad,
10 25$ micro loans from friends and co-workers
then again there's always the Dick sucking....

[Simon of the Playa]

I sold my ass to get to burning man.


Theres no shame in it.

[junglesmacks]

Know the difference between sucking cock for a ticket and buying from a scalper?


Burners will respect you even more for the cock sucking.

[theCryptofishist]

Can any of the gear be returned?

[BBadger]

You don't have much choice in the matter to be honest. You can yell "you promised!" all you want, but without the tickets in hand, well, you're screwed. If you had the tickets and she asked for some post-transaction compensation, that would be another matter, but she's holding the cards/tickets at the moment.

Anyway, that $650 price means the tickets are tier-2, so you're actually getting even greater a bargain than the majority of face-value tickets out there. They could be the tier-3 tickets at $390 each, which would be $780 you'd be paying out of pocket. Think about that.

I'd beg, borrow, but not steal to get that money ASAP before your fickle friend decides to up the price or sell them to someone else.

[Eric]

Sadly, I'm in agreement with the attitude (if not all the ideas) of most of the posters here- if you want to go, find a way to come up with the money. Sell something, take an advance on a credit card, borrow from family... tickets are extremely hard to come by, and this may be your only opportunity to acquire some.

For future reference, however, I wouldn't trust this "friend" to hold up their end of anything. Changing the game in the last round is tacky.

[C187]

The world is telling you to pay up. That person with the tickets could theoretically sell them for twice if not thrice the face value if she wanted to.
The snark is telling you that you should of been responsible enough to budget your burn with tickets in tow. After all you were planing on buying tickets in the first place, so what happened to that money?

[wh..sh]

Lesson: Always save for rainy days

I think you have plenty of opportunity to raise the money.
- You could do yard sale, its perfect season for those
- Take extra shifts at work or take up evening jobs. I know people who work at stadiums and such, its a busy season now.
- Go easy on your burning man prep and try to return splurges for something affordable (as fishy said)

Borrowing will be my last option. I hate to be in debts but YMMV.

[kittyrodriguez]

While I agree with the other responses to just "buy them" (and ASAP), I will say this. This person is your friend, correct. Have you tried talking with her about it? Just sit down and lay it out. Say it was a misunderstanding, you thought they were a gift and repurposed those funds. Don't be aggressive, just say you think you misunderstood what she meant when she said you could have them. See what she says. If it seems like she wants the cash, see if she's willing to work something out. Barter? Payment plan. Eternal indebtedness. It can't hurt to talk about it. If she says no, you are in the same spot you are now. If she offers some sort of solution, then you are ahead. Maybe she took your offers of payment seriously, but just did not make it clear. Don't lose a friend over it. Talk it out.

[Elderberry]

I'd do what kitty said, but then I'd dump her as a friend.

[Trishntek]

Pay it. It's worth it.

[Lex-Leo]

Thanks for all your thoughts, we will take your advice and find a way to pay for the tickets.

[Savannah]

Smart. It keeps your overall goal in sight.

Good luck. Be creative in your fundraising. And don't let the sting of your friend's over-promise distract you from the fact that face value is still principled (and very fortunate), even though she went back on her word.

[FIGJAM]

If you both donate plasma, that's $160 a week!

[trilobyte]

I'm moving this over to tickets discussion.

By your own admission you offered to pay face for the tickets on more than one occasion. Scramble for the cash and consider it a lesson learned, next time keep the money at the ready until you have the tickets in hand. Despite the miscommunication your new friend still did you a great kindness, there are many many people out there who would very gladly be willing to take those tickets.

[wh..sh]

If you both donate plasma, that's $160 a week!

What about sperms and such?

[wh..sh]

Don't lose a friend over it. Talk it out.

True! People change, their situation and needs change. No biggie.

[remi]

Just explain your situation.

Tell him that you were more then able to pay the full price in feb.. but since he said you didn't have to, you didn't budget for it. And now your not sure if you will be able to come up with all the funds. Perhaps see if you can pay him some now, then email money transfer the rest after a couple weeks work when you get back. He will probably still be on vacation and could use the cash more by then.

Cheers,

[Elderberry]

If you both donate plasma, that's $160 a week!

I've never done this, but I did donate blood for money when I was in college. Didn't pay near as well and you couldn't donate as often as you can for plasma either.

[Homiesinheaven]

no way! this is some major BULLSHIT. what a horrible friend! dont give her a fucking penny. put on some sweet dubstep, do the brute force in the face thing (real good like), and if she gets upset be like, WHATEVER, then tell her that some dude named "Homiesinheaven" on eplaya will giver her $700 in cash TODAY for both of them. she cant get away with this blatant back stabbing! join me and together we can teach her a lesson she'll never forget!

[FIGJAM]

If you both donate plasma, that's $160 a week!

I've never done this, but I did donate blood for money when I was in college. Didn't pay near as well and you couldn't donate as often as you can for plasma either.

20 yrs. ago you went in twice a week.

$20 for the first visit in the week, $25 for the second as an insentive to come twice a week.