ygmir wrote:is there something wrong with flirting?................
Nothing wrong with flirting, depending on how it's done. It's important to observe and respect boundaries. Sometimes flirting is about testing those boundaries, so observation and empathy are important. And, of course, one's boundaries are different with different people... it's easy to feel rejected when people set more distant boundaries for you than they do for others, but feeling rejected is one of the risks of flirting. Forcing your way past a boundary goes beyond flirting into the territory of sexual harassment. Of course, the trick is to convince people that they want to reset their boundaries, to let you a little closer...
All this said from an observer's/theorist's perspective. Picture me in a lab coat, holding a clipboard, and looking super-serious as I deliver this lecture. I really
don't know how to flirt in person... I just get awkward and confused almost immediately. I think that perhaps I walk around with huge walls up to dissuade flirting because I'm afraid of the awkwardness. One of my resolutions, along with myriad others, is to learn to flirt.
Here in The Bar, it's easier. There's
no very little real risk, after all.
If you want drama to stop following you everywhere, try letting go of the leash.