On creating art on the playa. Look to your motives...

kevinwells · Post by **kevinwells** » Tue Oct 19, 2004 11:17 pm

As the playa dust settles and I reflect back on this year's Burning Man, I find that I have learned a valuable lesson.
This year my project was a "paper tube temple" for a camp called "The Opulent Temple of Venus". It was a building that used paper tubes as primary structural components for the entire structure. (www.otov.org) I spent untold months designing, planning and acquiring supplies for the structure. I was so obsessed with the planning that I actually got fired from my job. To say I was driven is to avoid a deeper issue....

I had a fantasy that MY building would be noticed, photgraphed, admired, and probably mentioned as one of the signature pieces of Burning man 2004 ! What an ego, eh ? Truth is though, few people noticed the temple. They were not all that impressed, and really had no clue what was involved in getting the project together. It was just one small creation in the vast ocean of creativity that is Burning Man. It was no more amazing than any of the other wonderful pieces of vernacular art in 10,000 other camps.
This really had me bummed. I really wanted to be noticed, to be one of Burning man's "cool-arati". I wanted people to say "YOU are the guy that built that ? Wow ! Can I be one of your groupies ?". Alas, it did not happen.

I got over it though, I realized that in fact, I am a dork and will always be one. More importantly, I realized that the best memories of the week were during the construction and the creation of the temple. The process of working as a team to create our own, unique, vision was the overwhelming joy of the whole event. When the Opulent Temple team finally finished and our creation was ready, I swear it was one of my life's proudest moments. I was awed at what we had done.

The lesson is simple. Screw being cool. push yourself to create the art that you love. The joy is in the creation, not in other people's admiration. If you love what you have done, it is art and it will be amazing.
just my 2 cents....

Zulegoona · Post by **Zulegoona** » Tue Oct 19, 2004 11:30 pm

I don’t think I saw your creation, even so I really appreciate you for having done it. It is people like you that make Burning Man what it is with out you there would be nothing . Thanks

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:36 am

kevinwells wrote:I wanted people to say "YOU are the guy that built that ? Wow ! Can I be one of your groupies ?". Alas, it did not happen.

Been there.

mars · Post by **mars** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:58 am

I got over it though, I realized that in fact, I am a dork and will always be one.

Me too! And I think it's really fun to admit it! Wanting to be cool is such a depressing trap. There is such freedom in giving that up.

I really admire and appreciate your honesty.

Mars

thinkcooper · Post by **thinkcooper** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 10:19 am

I like what you built- didn't see it in person though...

Did you burn the tubes?

stuart · Post by **stuart** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 11:18 am

word

thanks for that

kevinwells · Post by **kevinwells** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 12:16 pm

The tubes were indeed burned, but we kept the other components like the tensile roof. At the end of the week, we had a little ceremony and then marched out to the burn barrel, each of us taking one of the tubes. It did definitely complete the whole weeklong event for us.

dragonfly Jafe · Post by **dragonfly Jafe** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 12:37 pm

The flip-side is when people find a whole new way to appreciate your art than you anticipated. This year I made a giant smoke ring generator for my vehicle. During the final weeks before departure, a talented virgin decorated it to look like the face of an evil woman whose mouth blew the smoke rings. It was to be the pinnacle piece of art for the vehicle.

Alas, it was not to be. The vehicle blew it's tranny in Nixon (so close...) and that was that. But we brought the face, thinking that we could blow smoke rings from our Esplanade camp. BTW - this was the purplish face at 5:00 & Esplanade (SpaceaHo camp)

Alas, that was also not to be, for as everyone present this year knows, the wind never stopped blowing (and the smoke rings require absolute stillness to work).

But hundreds if not thousands of people interacted with the face (missing it's eyes because of the high winds) in a totally unexpected way - they crawled around inside of it, photographed themselves in front of it, etc. It seemed to be a common rest spot as it was perfect for 2-3 people to sit inside out of the wind (and out of prying eyes). One couple apparently even had sex in it, based on some MOOP left behind (please clean up after your Playa loving). We got quite a bit of satisfaction out of all of this, as it was all we managed to bring (besides booze) to share.

Art is in the eye of the beholder.

blyslv · Post by **blyslv** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 1:07 pm

dragonfly Jafe wrote: blew it's tranny .

hee hee hee!

To the Original Poster: What a great message. I've fallen into similart traps, but I didn't work nearly as hard as you.

Some great wise person or another said: It is not the destination, it is the journey.

Or something.

Thanks

tonytohono · Post by **tonytohono** » Sun Nov 14, 2004 8:38 pm

Kevin, I am sorry I missed your temple. I know I missed tons of stuff and I actually saw as much as I possibly could in the 8 days and 7 nights I was there.

I hope you will do something as interesting again next year.

I would love to know where your creation is so that I can make a point of coming to see it, and with your permission, do at least one photo shoot there with one of the recruits I line up to photograph.

Peace.

Mister Jellyfish Mister · Post by **Mister Jellyfish Mister** » Mon Nov 15, 2004 8:22 am

You said it, Kevin. This being my first year, I guess I was seeking validation too. Part of me thought that building a mutant vehilce would assure me a place in heaven... or the vault of it anyway.

Upon arriving and feeling such warm and unconditional acceptance from so many, I realized the art car was nothing more than a toy to be shared. So I started training new pilots right and left, handing them the keys and watching the grins spread accross their faces as they drove the thing blinking into the night.

But you never know when you are truly touching somebody's life in a profound way. The ripples you make in the pond that it Burning Man can go unnoticed. For expample, your structure could have reminded somebody of a castle they built as a child with their father before he died... that kind of thing. It makes me think about things here in the default world, how we have more affect on others than we sometimes know.

I certainly share your joy around creation, Kevin. There were times after the burn when I would just go get my Mutant Vehicle from the storage facility, crack open a beer, and stare at it. Tinkering with the lighting and trying to get back to that place of creation when I was very happy indeed.

Damn, I need a new project! Hurry, what't the theme for next year?!!

regynalonglank · Post by **regynalonglank** » Mon Nov 15, 2004 10:36 am

kevinwells wrote:The joy is in the creation, not in other people's admiration. If you love what you have done, it is art and it will be amazing.

that is so true. unfortunately for me i never really liked what i made...it just didn't turn out to be the star powered planetary moment i had in mind, and at first i felt like i should go ahead and hang it even though i didn't like it, that i was being egotistical...in the end i didn't hang it, and i feel good about that because i didn't enjoy the process, and it didn't come out the way i wanted, so it was good to just let it go, and say, oh well, i didn't make the big cool thing, but it's ok, because i'm here, and everything is the way its supposed to be...i'm not saying this well, but for me not finishing my piece and not displaying it was the art.

HughMungus · Post by **HughMungus** » Mon Nov 15, 2004 3:18 pm

Whenever I create something, all I care about is how it makes me feel and how it makes others feel. Even if no one else likes it or appreciates it, the act of creating, itself, is useful.

sparkletarte · Post by **sparkletarte** » Mon Nov 15, 2004 5:11 pm

Meh, I'm purely a spectator, so I don't have to worry about my motives. It's so much easier- try it!

Kiba · Post by **Kiba** » Thu Nov 18, 2004 9:15 am

I think this thread has taken on a new significance in light of other discussions going on.

technopatra · Post by **technopatra** » Thu Nov 18, 2004 11:53 am

I think it's terrific that you guys are being reflective about your experience. I can think of a lot of people who would benefit from such an exercise.

Perhaps one way to look at it is that you are giving a gift. Not everyone on the playa accepts gifts. Not everyone likes what they are gifted. All you can do is keep in your heart the knowledge that you are giving freely, and let folks accept it as they wish.

It's difficult to not want credit your your motivations and effort. I struggle with this sometimes as one of the web team council members. Whne I start feeling unappreciated or whatever, I try to think of this as an exercise in humility - to try to let the fact that I made the effort by my reward.

I can't claim 100% success, but it is helping me grow as a person.

shitmouse · Post by **shitmouse** » Thu Nov 18, 2004 3:22 pm

• " wanted people to say "YOU are the guy that built that ? "

yes, there IS a part of recognition a creator wants, thrives for, and enjoys. it's about the energy, when someone else is excited about something you may have thought only YOU would enjoy. that's exciting yes.

a few years ago, a nice fellow named Mark Grieves built this very attractive miniature japanese villiage. NOBODY i knew saw it, and you had to know right where it was on the playa as you could so easily bypass it. i stumbled upon it one day with my pinhole camera and took that entire day's worth of polaroids there at his installation because i LOVED it. it was one of the coolest things IMO on the playa that year.

he was sooo stoked that i came by (and took about 20 shots giving him almost all of them), and that *i* was so energized by his artwork. it really made his day, and in return, it made MY day.

• "screw being cool".

it's funny. lately i've had a couple (BM) friends say jokingly that BM is a "competition for cool". he had an interesting point.

--(if short-attention-span-tourists can't slow down enough to appreciate smaller installations and "get it", then you didn't want them at your camp anyway. these would be the same people when asked what they are going to do on vacation in India, they will tell you "shopping")...

i think if you were the guy "that built that thing", i bet you'd also have another view on that angle after being in that seat once. always tending, long hours of people in your biz, etc. --- to me, getting recognition when your not expecting any, rewards the greatest yields.

i'm stoked to hear that you were proud of your art that you bled in the dust for, spent many hours planning, and executing. and it most likely DID get enjoyed by more people than you know. wish i could have seen it.
---( did you throw some flood lights on it at night?)

-b

On creating art on the playa. Look to your motives...

On creating art on the playa. Look to your motives...

Re: On creating art on the playa. Look to your motives...

You said it, Kevin

Re: On creating art on the playa. Look to your motives...