The Bar

helitack · Post by **helitack** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 7:45 pm

Got any hot Tecates or warm PBR's? If not a Milwuakee's Best Ice will do just fine. If your out of the eggs, how about some pigs feets.

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 7:45 pm

nipples wrote:Protein Sources
by Woodrow?

Heh, heh, we could make a trough in the floor at the local "theater" I frequent, if you know what I mean. Heh he.

Don't get me going... he knows more ways to store protein... his favorite is what he calls "The Vault"....

don't ask...

tisha2 · Post by **tisha2** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 7:46 pm

worse, Nipples. worse.

Course there's more Patron, Geekster!! How do ya want it??

That *was* nice Jason!! I missed it in that flurry of posts.

postal flurry?

helitack · Post by **helitack** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 7:47 pm

I'll take some of that Patron if there is enuff to go around!

geekster · Post by **geekster** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 7:49 pm

Oh, just dump me a shot in a glass. That will be fine. Man it rained like crazy in San Diego this week. I dont think I have ever seen it rain so hard there this early in the year.

tisha2 · Post by **tisha2** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 7:50 pm

helitack wrote:Got any hot Tecates or warm PBR's? If not a Milwuakee's Best Ice will do just fine. If your out of the eggs, how about some pigs feets.

haven't seen Buckethead tonight, so we no Hot Tecate (that has a nice ring to it...Hot Tecate!) But always warm PBR baby!! *squoosh* There ya go! And here's some fine playa dusted trail mix...!!! bleagh on the pigs feet. ick.

oooh, yeah!! plenty o Patron!! A round on the house!!

...Ole!!!

Sandwichman · Post by **Sandwichman** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 7:52 pm

samtzu wrote:Yeeowwie!! Cool stuff, Jason. Sphinxian If I ever meet you on the way to Athens (or is it Corinth?) I'll give you a wide berth...

Here is a little more for you it is mostly from the middle eastern region.

One nightfall a man travelling on horseback toward the sea reached an inn by the roadside. He dismounted, and confident in man and night like all riders toward the sea, he tied his horse to a tree beside the door and entered into the inn.
At midnight, when all were asleep, a thief came and stole the traveller's horse.
In the morning the man awoke, and discovered that his horse was stolen. And he grieved for his horse, and that a man had found it in his heart to steal.
Then his fellow-lodgers came and stood around him and began to talk.
And the first man said, "How foolish of you to tie your horse outside the stable."
And the second said, "Still more foolish, without even hobbling the horse!"
And the third man said, "It is stupid at best to travel to the sea on horseback."
And the fourth said, "Only the indolent and the slow of foot own horses."
Then the traveller was much astonished. At last he cried, "My friends, because my horse is stolen, you have hastened one and all to tell me my faults and my shortcomings. But strange, not one word of reproach have you uttered about the man who stole my horse."

nipples · Post by **nipples** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 7:54 pm

Okay.

You folowing me here?

I'm gonna make a stand right here & now, that I'll be damned if I'm gonna work with blood, and I'll be damned if I'm gonna work with urine, but yes, I will work with beer.

~raises oil can, asks the toast to beer & huge Australians Cans~

Sandwichman · Post by **Sandwichman** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 7:54 pm

nipples wrote:Okay.

You folowing me here?

I'm gonna make a stand right here & now, that I'll be damned if I'm gonna work with blood, and I'll be damned if I'm gonna work with urine, but yes, I will work with beer.

~raises oil can, asks the toast to beer & huge Australians Cans~

Here here

helitack · Post by **helitack** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 7:55 pm

OK, toss me a Patron and a PBR, there used to be a jar of jalapenos under the bar, could you check? And what time does the band start?

tisha2 · Post by **tisha2** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:00 pm

oh - the band....ummm.....DJ?

yep - the peppers are *ugh* right here! you sure you wanna do that?? Still haven't seen the last guy that tried one....

Sandwichman · Post by **Sandwichman** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:00 pm

tisha2 wrote:oh - the band....ummm.....DJ?

That's a good one it is about real bar time...

helitack · Post by **helitack** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:02 pm

Gotta have some Jalapenos when your drinkin', it counteracts the water in the booze.

amnesia · Post by **amnesia** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:08 pm

I did not know that.

~while stuffing jalepenos in pocket, Johnt Carson voice~

geekster · Post by **geekster** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:08 pm

If you eat those things just make sure to wash your hands BEFORE you pee!

amnesia · Post by **amnesia** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:09 pm

What? Did I say "Johnt"?

I thought I said Johnny.

tisha2 · Post by **tisha2** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:09 pm

Sandwichman wrote:
tisha2 wrote:oh - the band....ummm.....DJ?
That's a good one it is about real bar time...

ooh, right...yer headin' out soon to a *real* bar. whatever....

you heard me.

Sandwichman · Post by **Sandwichman** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:12 pm

tisha2 wrote:
Sandwichman wrote:
tisha2 wrote:oh - the band....ummm.....DJ?
That's a good one it is about real bar time...
ooh, right...yer headin' out soon to a *real* bar. whatever....

you heard me.

Hey don't get me started....

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:17 pm

geekster wrote:If you eat those things just make sure to wash your hands BEFORE you pee!

I was picking habaneros one day and.... well, you get the picture.

I sang "Ring of Fire" for some time afterwards...

tisha2 · Post by **tisha2** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:25 pm

okay, to bring us back round to poetry night in The Bar...how appropriate is this...??

A Boozer's Tale
by Steve Morris

I never drink beer on a Monday,
Cos Monday's the day fer mi health
An' the wife's got me countin' them units,
I've just got to take care o' miself
So I merely have wine wi' mi supper,
An' just the one litre OK?
Then a rather large rum in mi coffee
An' I calls that mi sensible day

I never drink wine on a Tuesday,
Cos Tuesday's mi weightwatchin' club
It's the day when I eat nowt but cabbage,
The day I don't go much fer grub
Now a diet demands plenty fluid,
Summat light an' completely fat-free
So I've chosen that strong German lager
An' I just have five pints wi' mi tea

I never drink lager on Wednesday,
Cos Wednesday's the day fer mi jog
It's tracksuit an' trainers at mid-day
Then I'm off up the road wi' the dog
First stop's at the Globe fer some Guinness,
Three swift ones'll get me to grips
Then I carry on round to The Shepherds
Fer three more an' a burger an' chips
I make sure that I'm suitably rested,
Then I sprint back to our garden wall
In a time of under twelve minutes,
An' it's four 'undred metres an' all

I never drink Guinness on Thursday,
Cos Thursday's mi day to relax
I likes to sit out in t' back garden
In mi brown zip-up cardie an slacks
After lunch I might stroll by the river,
Breeze in at the Fisherman's Drop
Where I lounge on the terrace all lordly,
Sippin' shandy, but beawt any pop
Then cos I've been good through the day like,
She'll allow me to waver a smidge
So mi evenin's spent watchin' the footy
Wi' a few packs o' Boddies from t' fridge

I never drink Boddies on Friday,
Cos Friday's mi night on the razz
An' we meet in The Firkin at seven,
Owd Nodger an' me an' Fat Baz
Oh The Firkin's a beer-drinker's heaven,
Wi' fifteen real ales from the jug
An' we start wi' the ones in the tap-room
An' we works our way round to the snug
By midnight we're all talkin' gubbins
An' we're off fer a curry up town
But there's summat not reyt about curry
Cos I never seem t' keep the stuff down
We 'ave a good laugh wi' the waiters,
An' Baz moons his bum fer a joke
Then I'm home fer a nightful o' passion,
Cos I'm known as a passionate bloke

I never do much on a Sat'day,
Cos Sat'day's mi time fer a think
Cos me an' the wife are not speakin' today,
I'm a drunken, fat pig an' I stink
So I sit near the lavvie pretendin'
That really I'm feelin' just great
But I'm goin' right off that Indian food
If it leaves me in this bloody state
It's later I make the decision,
On my forty-third trip to the bog
There's only one thing cures an upset like this
An' they call it the 'air o' the dog
I ring Nodge an' Baz on mi mobile
An' both of 'ems likewise in pain
So we're back in The Firkin at quarter-past-six
An' we do it all over again

I never say Firkin on Sunday,
Cos Sunday's mi day to repent
I'm ashamed of all o' that boozin' I've done
An' all o that money I've spent
I begs the wife fer forgiveness
An' I promise I'll alter mi ways
An' she gives me a kiss an' a cuddle,
Like she did in our newly-wed days
We watch Songs of Praise on the telly,
Then a nice pot o' tea an' some cakes
An' I swear now I've climbed up the ladders,
I'll never slide down any snakes
But it's borin' on telly on Sunday,
An' I can't say I'm ever impressed
So I 'ave a walk out round the village
An' stop off at the Collier's Rest
Now the beer's a bit crap in The Collier's
So I leave an' pop round to The Swan
Where I flatten a shed-load o' Tetley's
An' I'm bloody well back to square one

So I never drink beer on a Monday,
Cos Monday's the day fer mi health
An' the wife's got me countin' them units
I've just got to take care o' miself

helitack · Post by **helitack** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:26 pm

[/quote]I was picking habaneros one day and.... well, you get the picture.
[/quote]

It makes you tough though, you know. 'Bout ready fer another PBR there bartendress, if you would.

Sandwichman · Post by **Sandwichman** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:26 pm

Oh and the two pieces I posted were written by Kahil Girbran

Off to the bar.....

I am sure you will hear from me later. Be good kids

Jason

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:28 pm

I'll dringg to dhat.... phfft!

nipples · Post by **nipples** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:29 pm

I've got to head out for a bit, & might hit the sack early.

~slaps dusty hands~

okay

~does some head-butt-nugs~

gotta go

good night
sleep tight
mighty glad to know you

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:30 pm

Later, Fur Dude!!!

geekster · Post by **geekster** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:30 pm

Night, everybody. I'm gonna hit the sack. It is amazing how sitting around in airports and in planes can tire me out. Thanks for the Patron, Tisha.

Oh, and Sam ... yeah, I've done that ring of fire dance a couple of times myself. NOT fun.

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:31 pm

geekster wrote:Night, everybody. I'm gonna hit the sack. It is amazing how sitting around in airports and in planes can tire me out. Thanks for the Patron, Tisha.

Oh, and Sam ... yeah, I've done that ring of fire dance a couple of times myself. NOT fun.

Go in peace, Geekster.... yeah, it does wake you up and make you want to PAY ATTENTION NEXT TIME!!!!

tisha2 · Post by **tisha2** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:32 pm

helitack wrote:
samtzu wrote:I was picking habaneros one day and.... well, you get the picture.

It makes you tough though, you know. 'Bout ready fer another PBR there bartendress, if you would.

you got it, baby...time to fix m'self up another rum & lemonade, then it's my smoke break!

on the habanero note: i had a friend tell me once, "yeah, whiskey's all good and stuff, but don't ever let anyone try to lick it off your genitals...i'm serious."

oh - nightynight DJ! Have fun at the real bar!
back in a jiff!

helitack · Post by **helitack** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:37 pm

tisha2 wrote:
helitack wrote:
samtzu wrote:I was picking habaneros one day and.... well, you get the picture.

It makes you tough though, you know. 'Bout ready fer another PBR there bartendress, if you would.
you got it, baby...time to fix m'self up another rum & lemonade, then it's my smoke break!

on the habanero note: i had a friend tell me once, "yeah, whiskey's all good and stuff, but don't ever let anyone try to lick it off your genitals...i'm serious." :shock:

oh - nightynight DJ! Have fun at the real bar!
back in a jiff!

Allright, just keep those PBR's coming. These Jalapenos are a little old, could I have some of those 'Zels then too?

samtzu · Post by **samtzu** » Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:39 pm

tisha2 wrote:
helitack wrote:
samtzu wrote:I was picking habaneros one day and.... well, you get the picture.

It makes you tough though, you know. 'Bout ready fer another PBR there bartendress, if you would.
....on the habanero note: i had a friend tell me once, "yeah, whiskey's all good and stuff, but don't ever let anyone try to lick it off your genitals...i'm serious."

....HEY! Don't lick whisky? Why not!!??.... YEAH! Why not? We like that....
Hey! Pipe down, guys... be cool, okay. Besides, whiskey burns... a lot...
.... probably isn't as bad as the time you let us get kicked... .... yeah! That hurt!!.... Just shut up.