"One Item" for Idiots--Bad Playa Prep

Jackass · Post by **Jackass** » Fri Aug 02, 2013 10:42 am

theCryptofishist wrote:Whenever you see a neighbor's house with work getting done, so it has a porta-pottie in the yard, go and use it, so that you wont be "shit shy" when you get to the playa. This ensures that you are "regular" all week.

Don't forget to drop one of those singing Christmas cards back there where no one can find it, for good measure

FIGJAM · Post by **FIGJAM** » Fri Aug 02, 2013 10:43 am

And help with the work on the house dressed in your tutu.

Canoe · Post by **Canoe** » Sun Aug 04, 2013 8:38 am

illy dilly wrote:... Just make sure you don't run out until you get run home from BRC.

Lonesomebri · Post by **Lonesomebri** » Sun Aug 04, 2013 12:20 pm

One item a day......well, I updated my medical marijane card, in case I'm stoped.
Figure I'll get around to fixing that tail light once I get back from the burn.

unjonharley · Post by **unjonharley** » Sun Aug 04, 2013 1:07 pm

Painting on the side of the van.. A pig in a cops uniform, fucking a dog and eating a doughnut..

Roberto Dobbisano · Post by **Roberto Dobbisano** » Sun Aug 04, 2013 2:15 pm

non-sensible shoes....

duh.

TT120 · Post by **TT120** » Sun Aug 04, 2013 2:19 pm

Lonesomebri wrote:One item a day......well, I updated my medical marijane card, in case I'm stoped.
Figure I'll get around to fixing that tail light once I get back from the burn.

I don't believe that maryjane card means anything on BLM land.

All it really means is that if a cop sees it, guaranteed search.

Bless · Post by **Bless** » Sun Aug 04, 2013 2:22 pm

Roberto Dobbisano wrote:non-sensible shoes....

I prefer Gucci

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Sun Aug 04, 2013 2:23 pm

unjonharley wrote:Painting on the side of the van.. A pig in a cops uniform, fucking a dog and eating a doughnut..

Now that's "Radical Mutation"!

TomServo · Post by **TomServo** » Sun Aug 04, 2013 3:00 pm

Cloth makes an excellent filter for dry wall rated dust! Wrap it around your face.

Lonesomebri · Post by **Lonesomebri** » Sun Aug 04, 2013 8:26 pm

TT120 wrote:
Lonesomebri wrote:One item a day......well, I updated my medical marijane card, in case I'm stoped.
Figure I'll get around to fixing that tail light once I get back from the burn.
I don't believe that maryjane card means anything on BLM land.

All it really means is that if a cop sees it, guaranteed search.

I knew there must have been some reason I included it in this thread....

TT120 · Post by **TT120** » Sun Aug 04, 2013 8:34 pm

Oh shit! LOL, I'm in the wrong thread....

Sorry Bri......I'll go sort and pack some more crap now. Carry on!

Post by **Savannah** » Sun Aug 04, 2013 8:39 pm

Lonesomebri · Post by **Lonesomebri** » Sun Aug 04, 2013 9:30 pm

I don't believe that maryjane card mean ... ed search.

Can't be said enough though......

Canoe · Post by **Canoe** » Mon Aug 05, 2013 1:48 am

Lonesomebri wrote:One item a day......well, I updated my medical marijane card, in case I'm stoped. Figure I'll get around to fixing that tail light once I get back from the burn.

unjonharley wrote:Painting on the side of the van.. A pig in a cops uniform, fucking a dog and eating a doughnut..

Here's another one...

Driver complaining about being stopped & searched on route to BM:
[list]
[*]on the Interstate,
[*]on the highway going North from Fernly (twice),
[*]arriving in Gerlach,
[*]leaving Gerlach,
[*]just after Gate, and
[*]yet again before they got to their site.[/list]Driver wants advice on filing complaints against the various law enforcement entities who driver claims engaged in illegal profiling. [/color][/i]

http://eplaya.burningman.org/viewtopic.php?f=56&t=63539

DrewDubious · Post by **DrewDubious** » Mon Aug 05, 2013 5:47 am

TT120 wrote:
Lonesomebri wrote:One item a day......well, I updated my medical marijane card, in case I'm stoped.
Figure I'll get around to fixing that tail light once I get back from the burn.
I don't believe that maryjane card means anything on BLM land.

All it really means is that if a cop sees it, guaranteed search.

It also means you paid taxes on yer grass!

goathead · Post by **goathead** » Mon Aug 05, 2013 5:57 am

DrewDubious wrote:
TT120 wrote:
Lonesomebri wrote:One item a day......well, I updated my medical marijane card, in case I'm stoped.
Figure I'll get around to fixing that tail light once I get back from the burn.
I don't believe that maryjane card means anything on BLM land.

All it really means is that if a cop sees it, guaranteed search.

It also means you paid taxes on yer grass!

and what new about paying taxes to get fucked again, and again, and again????

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Mon Aug 05, 2013 10:17 am

Canoe wrote:
Lonesomebri wrote:One item a day......well, I updated my medical marijane card, in case I'm stoped. Figure I'll get around to fixing that tail light once I get back from the burn.
unjonharley wrote:Painting on the side of the van.. A pig in a cops uniform, fucking a dog and eating a doughnut..
Here's another one...
Driver complaining about being stopped & searched on route to BM:
[list]
[*]on the Interstate,
[*]on the highway going North from Fernly (twice),
[*]arriving in Gerlach,
[*]leaving Gerlach,
[*]just after Gate, and
[*]yet again before they got to their site.[/list]Driver wants advice on filing complaints against the various law enforcement entities who driver claims engaged in illegal profiling. [/color][/i]
http://eplaya.burningman.org/viewtopic.php?f=56&t=63539

illy dilly · Post by **illy dilly** » Wed Aug 07, 2013 9:59 am

Don't bother with the Main sale, STEP, the OMG Sale or any of that nonsense there will be plenty of tickets sold in Gerlach and at the Gate.

Lonesomebri · Post by **Lonesomebri** » Wed Aug 07, 2013 10:25 am

Just bought a gross of those plastic Mardi Gras beads to gift....well...they might be from the Popes visit to Brazil or the last Superbowl, or something, but it's the thought that counts, right?

robbidobbs · Post by **robbidobbs** » Wed Aug 07, 2013 5:46 pm

Go to the Dollar Store and buy a hundred dollars worth of cheap toys to gift to people. They will love it!
And while you're there, get several packages of fiberglass wipes, chocolate candies, confetti and a bag of feathers.

knowmad · Post by **knowmad** » Wed Aug 07, 2013 5:58 pm

Go to K-Mart or Wally World and buy a Cheap-ass-bike and then ride it from the Airport to BRC just to feel extra self-reliant. ignore the fact that you will have to rely on EMT's and dental records when some poor shmuck turns you into road-pizza.

Gonzo Frothwood · Post by **Gonzo Frothwood** » Wed Aug 07, 2013 6:02 pm

If you ride a bike naked out there I want you to duct tape coarse sandpaper to the crotch of your pants or underwear starting tomorrow and wear them all day every day till you get out there.

robbidobbs · Post by **robbidobbs** » Wed Aug 07, 2013 6:50 pm

OOH! Taint Burn!

I know! Just ride around on your bicycle with nylon shorts and no underwear for a few hours. Don't bring water because you won't need it. Do this at about 5pm in heavy traffic. Perfect playa conditions!

BurnerBunny · Post by **BurnerBunny** » Wed Aug 07, 2013 7:19 pm

road pizza sounds tasty. Do they deliver it all over the playa, or just near the center?

knowmad wrote:Go to K-Mart or Wally World and buy a Cheap-ass-bike and then ride it from the Airport to BRC just to feel extra self-reliant. ignore the fact that you will have to rely on EMT's and dental records when some poor shmuck turns you into road-pizza.

DrewDubious · Post by **DrewDubious** » Wed Aug 07, 2013 7:22 pm

Is it bad that I used this thread to make my packing list?

Post by **Savannah** » Wed Aug 07, 2013 7:29 pm

DrewDubious wrote:Is it bad that I used this thread to make my packing list?

No! Carry on.

Don't pack any powder for your ass, by the way. It's a much more authentic Burn experience if you have prickly heat up your bum and have to show it to a nurse.

DrewDubious · Post by **DrewDubious** » Wed Aug 07, 2013 7:33 pm

Savannah wrote:
DrewDubious wrote:Is it bad that I used this thread to make my packing list?
No! Carry on.

Don't pack any powder for your ass, by the way. It's a much more authentic Burn experience if you have prickly heat up your bum and have to show it to a nurse.

I figured I would just use playa dust.

Post by **Sham** » Wed Aug 07, 2013 7:40 pm

DrewDubious wrote:
Savannah wrote:
DrewDubious wrote:Is it bad that I used this thread to make my packing list?
No! Carry on.

Don't pack any powder for your ass, by the way. It's a much more authentic Burn experience if you have prickly heat up your bum and have to show it to a nurse.

I figured I would just use playa dust.

By George, I think he's got it!

Post by **Savannah** » Wed Aug 07, 2013 7:45 pm

Shambala wrote: By George, I think he's got it!

Shambala . . . you realize no one can prove we're not Gene Kelly and Donald O'Conner.

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"One Item" for Idiots--Bad Playa Prep

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