Ask Eric

FIGJAM · Post by **FIGJAM** » Fri Aug 09, 2013 8:01 pm

Dear Eric

Why can't pink borrow something from tek?

Post by **Eric** » Fri Aug 09, 2013 9:05 pm

FIGJAM wrote:Why can't pink borrow something from tek?

Her question wasn't "who can I borrow from", but "what should I wear". I answered the question that was asked.

fresh · Post by **fresh** » Fri Aug 09, 2013 9:27 pm

fresh wrote:Well I think I might have to take up on this offer. Get the RV after these people leave on Thursday for 4 days!!!! I probably will have a dead battery, dead swamp cooler, broken monkey hut, and flat air mattress by Tuesday, it will be a relief!! It's ONLY $2,500!!!!

Seriously? You posted a link to a commercial deal in a thread run by an arrogant Moderator? You must be wearing your "kick-me" shirt today. Link removed, make sure you're wearing fairy wings, really tacky fake-fur booties, & a blue bob wig to the Meet 'n Greet, and you best be hanging your head in shame when I meet you

You wrre the one to tell me to find an rv. Its late in the game now!

Canoe · Post by **Canoe** » Fri Aug 09, 2013 9:30 pm

... in a thread run by an arrogant Moderator? ...

Be nice people. This is how rumours get started...

Post by **Eric** » Fri Aug 09, 2013 9:36 pm

fresh wrote:You wrre the one to tell me to find an rv. Its late in the game now!

I didn't tell you to post links here, I told you to rent one yourself. We don't need to see the dirty business.
Sheesh. No wonder you people have to pay for them.

Canoe wrote:
... in a thread run by an arrogant Moderator? ...
Be nice people. This is how rumours get started...

I don't think it counts as a rumour if I say it about myself.

Canoe · Post by **Canoe** » Fri Aug 09, 2013 9:37 pm

Eric wrote:
Canoe wrote:
... in a thread run by an arrogant Moderator? ...
Be nice people. This is how rumours get started...
I don't think it counts as a rumour if I say it about myself.

See!
See what you're starting!

FIGJAM · Post by **FIGJAM** » Fri Aug 09, 2013 9:38 pm

Dear Eric

Why do you think there is any connection between my question and hers?

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Fri Aug 09, 2013 11:35 pm

Dear Eric
Is bringing a lighter to set tutus on fire at the meet'n'greet a good evil idea, or should I advance to the next level?

Post by **Eric** » Sat Aug 10, 2013 12:04 am

Canoe wrote:See!
See what you're starting!

Yes I do. Save someone else the trouble.

FIGJAM wrote:Why do you think there is any connection between my question and hers?

If you don't understand the connection, I'm worried. You're the man who can macgyver anything, yet you ask this...

theCryptofishist wrote:Is bringing a lighter to set tutus on fire at the meet'n'greet a good evil idea, or should I advance to the next level?

You may set sparkle-ponies in tutus on fire if you can surreptitiously get them into a Burn barrel, which shouldn't be hard. Please avoid setting fire to tutu-wearing ePlayans, unless the tutu is hitting you in the face. In that case, advance it to the next level.

Two-Wheeled-Adventure · Post by **Two-Wheeled-Adventure** » Sat Aug 10, 2013 4:31 am

Dear Eric,

Is the BRC subway a legit thing or am I just that gullible? Also which Star Trek series is the best?

Devin

Two-Wheeled-Adventure · Post by **Two-Wheeled-Adventure** » Sat Aug 10, 2013 7:39 am

Two-Wheeled-Adventure wrote:Dear Eric,

Is the BRC subway a legit thing or am I just that gullible?

Ha never mind, I over looked the parody bit... And seems a bit unlikely but what do I know I've never been to BM. The Star Trek question still stands tho

D

Post by **Eric** » Sat Aug 10, 2013 10:27 am

Two-Wheeled-Adventure wrote:Is the BRC subway a legit thing or am I just that gullible? Also which Star Trek series is the best?

As you yourself discovered, you are gullible, but the entire event is so absurd it's hard to tell what's real sometimes.

There are no "best" TV shows, they're TV shows. Turn the damn thing off and go outside. Bring a book if you want to be entertained and other people won't do it for you.

Patsh · Post by **Patsh** » Sat Aug 10, 2013 10:45 am

Eric wrote: There are no "best" TV shows, they're TV shows. Turn the damn thing off and go outside. Bring a book if you want to be entertained and other people won't do it for you.

(see this signature... seems appropriate)

Post by **Eric** » Sat Aug 10, 2013 12:39 pm

Triken wrote:(see this signature... seems appropriate)

You may be praised as one of the Holy Amongst Nations for 7 hours, 35 minutes exactly, starting at 3am August 27th, 2013.
(I don't want anyone in this thread to have a larger ego than me.)

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Sat Aug 10, 2013 4:12 pm

Two-Wheeled-Adventure wrote:
Two-Wheeled-Adventure wrote:Dear Eric,

Is the BRC subway a legit thing or am I just that gullible?

Ha never mind, I over looked the parody bit... And seems a bit unlikely but what do I know I've never been to BM. The Star Trek question still stands tho

D

YOu mean there's no such thing as transparent aluminum? I was so looking forward to a 360 degree view on my next flight.

Eric
How could I have been more sarcasticer?

Post by **Eric** » Sat Aug 10, 2013 4:21 pm

theCryptofishist wrote:How could I have been more sarcasticer?

If you're asking, you obviously don't have it in you.

Go up to the border of rudeness, and stick your toe across.

theCryptofishist · Post by **theCryptofishist** » Sat Aug 10, 2013 4:35 pm

Charming.

You do realize that that question was just there as a transparent figleaf over the fact I was posting a statement, and didn't need an answer from you, don't you?

Post by **Eric** » Sat Aug 10, 2013 4:59 pm

theCryptofishist wrote:Charming.

You do realize that that question was just there as a transparent figleaf over the fact I was posting a statement, and didn't need an answer from you, don't you?

Much better.

FIGJAM · Post by **FIGJAM** » Sat Aug 10, 2013 6:26 pm

Dear Eric

Do you think Miss Knowmer would be a good name for our new and improved Knowmad?

GreyCoyote · Post by **GreyCoyote** » Sat Aug 10, 2013 6:35 pm

Eric;

So, like, WTF is up with this thing called "Burning Man"? I've never seen so many damn queers, queens, dikes, lezzies, poly-quats, misfits, half-wits, nit-wits, zipper-heads, stoners, commie-pinko-symps and over-the-hill faux haute couture raver scum in my life! Is there a bag limit on hunting these people? Where do you recommend I camp so I can grope the hottest chicks, bed the coolest soccer mama's, and generally not have to deal with all these other gutter-freaks? And why do they hold this in the desert? This thing might actually catch-on if they held it at am amphitheater or someplace you could get food, beer and t-shirts. BTW, I got this invite to camp from some hottie in a group called the "Swish Embassy". Are they cool peeps? Keep it real, Bro!

Sincerely,
Skip "The Hunk" Jergins, 28, Rig Boss for Halliburton, Boise, Idaho.

(I can't wait for Eric's answer to this one. heheheheh. Maybe I should cross-post this in "Blood In The Water Thread Starters?")

H.G.Crosby · Post by **H.G.Crosby** » Sat Aug 10, 2013 8:02 pm

Dear Eric, are poly-quats and kumquats the same thing?

is there a poly-quat paradise and is it poly-quats only?

knowmad · Post by **knowmad** » Sun Aug 11, 2013 9:40 am

Eric, Were you aware that if one enters 99 on the microwave, the microwave will run for 1 min and 39 seconds?

Post by **Eric** » Sun Aug 11, 2013 1:12 pm

FIGJAM wrote:Do you think Miss Knowmer would be a good name for our new and improved Knowmad?

Do you really think that someone who always goes by "Eric" is going to change someones' name?

GreyCoyote wrote:So, like, WTF is up with this thing called "Burning Man"? I've never seen so many damn queers, queens, dikes, lezzies, poly-quats, misfits, half-wits, nit-wits, zipper-heads, stoners, commie-pinko-symps and over-the-hill faux haute couture raver scum in my life! Is there a bag limit on hunting these people? Where do you recommend I camp so I can grope the hottest chicks, bed the coolest soccer mama's, and generally not have to deal with all these other gutter-freaks? And why do they hold this in the desert? This thing might actually catch-on if they held it at am amphitheater or someplace you could get food, beer and t-shirts. BTW, I got this invite to camp from some hottie in a group called the "Swish Embassy". Are they cool peeps? Keep it real, Bro!

tl;dr

H.G.Crosby wrote:Dear Eric, are poly-quats and kumquats the same thing?

is there a poly-quat paradise and is it poly-quats only?

No.
It's open to all quats, and you're free to dip hippies into it in a vain attempt to remove lingering algae from them.

knowmad wrote:Eric, Were you aware that if one enters 99 on the microwave, the microwave will run for 1 min and 39 seconds?

Fascinating. Suddenly I'm ready to take a nap.

DrewDubious · Post by **DrewDubious** » Sun Aug 11, 2013 1:33 pm

Eric wrote:
GreyCoyote wrote:So, like, WTF is up with this thing called "Burning Man"? I've never seen so many damn queers, queens, dikes, lezzies, poly-quats, misfits, half-wits, nit-wits, zipper-heads, stoners, commie-pinko-symps and over-the-hill faux haute couture raver scum in my life! Is there a bag limit on hunting these people? Where do you recommend I camp so I can grope the hottest chicks, bed the coolest soccer mama's, and generally not have to deal with all these other gutter-freaks? And why do they hold this in the desert? This thing might actually catch-on if they held it at am amphitheater or someplace you could get food, beer and t-shirts. BTW, I got this invite to camp from some hottie in a group called the "Swish Embassy". Are they cool peeps? Keep it real, Bro!
tl;dr

Bravo ::golfclap::

Conduit · Post by **Conduit** » Sun Aug 11, 2013 6:22 pm

Eric - I'll be greeting on a naked shift. How many Viagra pills should I take?

Post by **Eric** » Sun Aug 11, 2013 6:45 pm

Conduit wrote:Eric - I'll be greeting on a naked shift. How many Viagra pills should I take?

6. That way people might have a chance to actually see it.

Roberto Dobbisano · Post by **Roberto Dobbisano** » Sun Aug 11, 2013 6:45 pm

Eric - If a Greeter tries to hug you while sporting a full on chubby is that sexual harassment or neat way to meet your fiancee?

Post by **Eric** » Sun Aug 11, 2013 7:03 pm

Roberto Dobbisano wrote:Eric - If a Greeter tries to hug you while sporting a full on chubby is that sexual harassment or neat way to meet your fiancee?

I go to the back of the RV when we approach Greeters in an attempt to limit my contact with hippies, so this situation wouldn't occur.

DrewDubious · Post by **DrewDubious** » Sun Aug 11, 2013 7:05 pm

Dear Eric,

I'm not a hippy, do I get a hug?

goathead · Post by **goathead** » Sun Aug 11, 2013 7:12 pm

Dear Eric

Can I buy my DJ's From Mars tickets at the door this year, or do I need to buy then in advance?

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