My Van and I

[Elderberry]

I found this on Facebook. I don't usually read stories this long, but somehow I just couldn't stop.

A Burningman 2013 True Story

I'm Josh. Unfortunately, this story is all true. This was my first time back to Burningman since 2008. I had just completely recovered from a bad head injury and could finally handle a festival again. woo hoo!

Well, it all started after my girlfriend and love of my life, kicked me out after over two years of being together for some other guy she now liked. I was living back at my parents house for three weeks before finding out that my ex was already engaged to her new guy. It was just too much. I had a framed picture that my ex had given to me of us together in the picture that said "Love Forever" on the image. That picture was now torturing me. I just wanted to burn it at the Temple and let it all go and feel better. Burning the picture was my main reason for going.

I had almost no money. I did have a vehicle though. It was a van that I had just purchased about two weeks earlier and was very excited about owning. I had already missed the beginning of Burningman and decided to post an ad on Craigslist Austin looking for anyone that I could find to pay for the gas to Burningman if we took my vehicle. I got a response from an Austin girl that had never been to Burningman, but wanted to go for the reason of finding her ex boyfriend and trying to fix things. At 2am the next morning two broken people left Austin for Black Rock City.

On the drive the girl was fairly paranoid about some things that she said she had done to some people in the past. She thought they were after her to kill her, or to turn her into a sex slave. She would get a little wiggie, then she would take her medicine and begin to relax and get really mellow. On the drive we switched drivers several times over the 33 hours on the road. She was the worst driver, but we somehow made it.

When we arrived, she had a ticket and I did not. I was wanting to find someone with an extra ticket at the gate somehow, but there was nobody there, as we were so late arriving. We arrived at 3pm on Saturday just before the burn. I made a really bad decision (on no sleep for days)of letting her take my van in and set up camp. She was suppose to look for a ticket for me on the inside while I looked for one on the outside and once either of us found one we would then call the other person. So, I hitched a ride back out to Gerlach with a really nice lady. Once I got back to Gerlach, I got out and made a sign. I held the sign up and the very first car coming by pulled over and had an extra ticket. It was amazing luck! Maybe.

I hitched a ride in and was back to the gate in 20 minuites. I walked in with a gallon of water and the contents in my pockets.

Once I got in, I went to where I had showed her that I wanted to camp but I never found the girl or my van. Phone reception was gone and we could not communicate any longer once inside. She was nowhere to be found.

After loosing everything important in my life (my girl, my pig, my dog, my chickens, my rooster, and my fish) I had now lost just about everything else that I had left. Despair began to kick in. I had nothing but a gallon of water, the clothes on my back, and $120 in cash.

Once inside, I walked and biked around for three days and hit every street on the playa looking for my van, and for that girl. I even posted at the info center as well looking for her. The framed picture I had come to burn was in the van. I looked for days..... I slept in the worst places, once on the playa, and relied on people I had just met for everything I needed while I was inside. I made some really good friends in the process of surviving out there. Burners are amazing. (Camp Open, thank you for everything...the coffee, the beer, the food...everything! Many Thanks!)

Loosing everything and having almost nothing was an amazing experience. Once I was able to accept it, it was very liberating. I have never experienced anything like it before. I'm not sure what to say about it except that it was very good for me to reach such a low. I had no responsibilities, I had no material items, I just was, and that was it!

The worst low came when the Temple burned and I was not able to get the picture to the Temple in time to burn it. It was in the van. Hours before the burn, I hit one of my lowest points ever. All I wanted to do was to put the picture on the Temple, sit with it for a while, and then burn it. I had made it so far and could not do it.

The burn was coming in one hour. The last time I had cut my hair was four days before my head injury two and a half years earlier. I was celebrating my recovery and my hair represented a dark part of my life. I cut all my hair off and was able to burn it at the temple. Im starting over. My new hair will represent something better.

I was not able to get the picture to the Temple. Maybe I was never suppose to burn it, but I'm bringing it back next year to try again anyway. Hopefully the reasons for everything will be clearer at that point.

The Temple burned.
I partied that night.

On Monday, at the end of my rope and after doing 50 miles through the desert over the last several days looking for my van, I began to ask for the Rangers help. I spoke to every Ranger I could find and showed them pictures of the van I was missing. Finally one of them had a winning idea. His phone worked! He called the girls phone and left a message that the vehicle had been reported stolen.

Later that night I got a bunch of text that showed up on my phone. It was from the girl with my van, and she said the she had not stole the van and that it was at the Burningman tow yard. Another text said "I'm sorry, I'll buy you a new one." That text worried me. I got up from where I was sleeping in the middle of the night around 4am and got on my bike and went ridding off to the tow yard.

My van was there.

There was writing all over the outside of the van. I opened it up and it was trashed. There were crosses on the inside of each window that had the word "sanctuary" under each one. I crawled in and passed out, dead tired.

When I woke up two hours later there was a group of tow truck drivers gathered around talking near the back of the vehicle. I crawled out and began to talk to them. I was greeted with "is this your van" by one if the tow drivers. I said it was, and asked him where they had found it. I was told by the tow driver that had towed the van back, that it was found way up on a hill. He pointed and said, "you see that hill right there, you see the one behind it, you see the one behind that.....it was way up there". I asked how far away it was found and he replied "at least 30 miles from the tow area."

I remember saying "holy shit!"

He then told me he had picked up the girl walking back to Burningman from the van. She was walking the entire 30 miles back. He said she might have walked 6 miles already when he picked her up. She could have died up there. He said she was acting really crazy, and he said that in all his years of driving he had never had a rider freak him out as much as this girl did. The driver also told me that the girl had told him that she had put monster energy drink in the gas tank with some hydrogen peroxide. I was slightly confused at this point.

I began to search through my stuff in the van and found the girls medication in my bag. All I could imagine was that she had lost her meds and went nuts. She had gone out there to fix her relationship but she never found the guy she was looking for, never found me, lost her meds, and might have even found some really good drugs as well. I do remember that at one point during the drive from Austin she had said that the people who wanted to kill her could not do it if she was in a church. At one point she thought that a car driving behind us was her killers and she held her bible up the the window as the car drove by. That was weird! She even said she had become a nun so they could not take her life or turn her into a sex slave. She talked about human trafficking and was calling churches telling them her story on the drive. It was drama.

So when she had the van, she really thought something or someone was going to come in to the van to get her when she was doing what she did to the van. It's like a real live horror movie that existed only in her mind. It must have been crazy what she was feeling and what she was experiencing while doing what she did.

I stayed with the van after the tow company left Burningman and was the only vehicle left there near the exit gate. My insurance company said they would cover the claim under "stolen and vandalized", so I waited for a tow truck they were sending me.

I did not report it as stolen, in order to keep the girl out of trouble. I didn't think her acts were criminal, just crazy. I don't like getting anyone in trouble.

The van and I were towed into Reno where I slept in the van behind the car shop over the weekend waiting on the insurance estimator to show up. Their estimate was less than the $500 deductible, and with no keys, no mechanical estimate could be done. I called the girl to ask her to send the keys. She said she would.

Five days later the keys showed up at the FedEx store in Reno. I was staying at a weekly hotel waiting for the keys to show. The morning The box showed up in Reno, I got a call from the Reno police to let me know they had opened and searched the box because it only had a first name on it. She had sent it to "Josh". The cops thought that was strange enough to open it.

When the keys showed up, I got on my bike to do the six miles to the FedEx store where they were waiting. On the way there, I was coming down a hill while going fast and had a bad bicycle accident when trying to go from the street to the curb. I flew off the bike like superman. A bunch of school children getting out of school saw me do this. Both arms were hurt bad, still are at the time of this writing, and I can barely use a can opener at this point which is a huge improvement. Back to the story... I had to ditch my bike and take a bus to get the keys from the FedEx office.

Once I got to the van with the keys I had to fill it with gas. I purchased a gas can at the gas station and filled it. By this time my arms were hurting so bad they were almost unusable. I got help filling the tank with the gas, put the key in the ignition, and it started up after a few trys. By this time I couldn't even turn the key with my right hand. I started the van with my left hand.

The van started up but ran really rough for the first few minutes. It was shaking like crazy and a cloud of playa dust shook off of the van. Once running a little better, I took it to the gas station and filled it all the way up. I drove it for a while with the words still on the van but way too many people were looking at me. I started to feel like I was the crazy one at that point. It had rained and some if the paint was coming off so I went ahead and washed the van and most of everything on the van came off of the outside with a high pressure sprayer. It was acrylic paint. I finished my week up at the hotel to let my busted arms rest. Everything began to swell and turn purple and I ended up going to the ER to get X-rays taken. I'm in luck (if that's what you call this), no broken bones.

When my week was up at the hotel, I left to Northern California to see a friend who told me that he had a job for me, and a place to stay. Well, he didn't have either for me when I got here. It all fell through.

At the moment I am living in Arcata CA in my freaky van right by the bay. Just waiting time. It's really nice here. I can't make it home, but don't really have a home anyway.

As of now, I have been here one week looking for work and think I want to move to the area. Everyone is really happy here.

Last night I went out drinking with a friend. We were walking back to our vehicles when a truck came backing out of a driveway very fast, totally out of nowhere, and it hit me hard as I tried to jump out of the way. I got hit on my right arm, the arm that hurts the most from the bicycle accident. "Ouch" I yelled! I guess I was just in shock and just ended up telling the the guy that I was ok. I didn't want to get him in any trouble.

Later, I am realizing its a little worse than I thought.

Ouch ouch ouch. I just hit by a m$&@!?ing truck!

Oh yea, back to the story....

While I was in Reno I spoke to the girl that had taken the van. She compared her self to Moses, and said she had taken the van up on to the mountain to hear from God. She said she then went and wrote Gods commandments all over my van, and on the inside. She wanted me to take pictures because she could not remember everything that god had told her. I can't believe she wrote Gods commandments on my van! How common is this kind of thing? Wow!

All and all life is awesome. My 2013 trip to Burningman turned out to be one of the most interesting times of my life. I even take meaning from the words she wrote on my van. They are all about forgiveness and unconditional love. Definitely good words to live by.

Ill be there next year, and it scares the hell out if me thinking about what might happen.

The pictures are on my facebook page "Josh Gatto".

What an crazy experience!

Burningman.....Totally Fucking Worth It!

[Ataki]

Hm. Bout all I can say is.. wow.

[fernley1]

Yeah, this story is all over facebook. It has many threads, from the guys, the girls, and even from the vans point of view.

[trilobyte]

It reads like something that was crafted for social media sharing

[Elderberry]

He was sure able to stretch $120.00.

[tamarakay]

I have an overwhelming desire to shake the crap out of him.

[Elderberry]

Ya, but...It was "Totally Fucking Worth It!"

[Asquared]

He was sure able to stretch $120.00.

my thoughts exactly.
enjoyable read though, real or not.

[Savannah]

Yeah, this story is all over facebook. It has many threads, from the guys, the girls, and even from the vans point of view.

I'll bet I would really enjoy what the van had to say.

[FIGJAM]

Nigel Tigernuts say's it's bullshit, and he never lies!

[Elderberry]

I'll bet I would really enjoy what the van had to say.

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[Savannah]

Superior editing!

[media]

[BBadger]

Livin' in a van down by the playa!

[Captain Goddammit]

There were a lot of holes in that story.
It's bullshit.
And if it were true this guy is the biggest idiot ever.
The first most alarming tell tale bullshit was the plan to call each other when a ticket was found.
Everyone who has really ever been to BRC knows that wont work.
There's too much other bullshit to even bother with.
Total garbage.
The only part I believe is that his girlfriend dumped him for someone better!

[itaintwhatitseems]

There were a lot of holes in that story.
It's bullshit.
And if it were true this guy is the biggest idiot ever.
The first most alarming tell tale bullshit was the plan to call each other when a ticket was found.
Everyone who has really ever been to BRC knows that wont work.
There's too much other bullshit to even bother with.
Total garbage.
The only part I believe is that his girlfriend dumped him for someone better!

there's cell service in gerlach and free wifi too.........the really difficult part to believe is that van could make it 30 miles outside the playa and up hills, it would HAVE TO be AWD

[Captain Goddammit]

Yes but generally no cell service for the girl in BRC.
And no burner would even think that making a cell call to or from BRC was an option.

I got really iffy when he said he had absolutely nothing left and all his possessions were in the van, yet he busted out photos of the van for the rangers... who had working cell phones...

Possible? Sure. It's possible.

[itaintwhatitseems]

ha ha......that van is AWD (at least it says so on the door)......really slow day at work for me to play detective. Yeah, you could do some off roading with a van like that

As far as phone service goes people make the trip to gerlach for various reasons (food, showers, fuel, ect) so you can still communicate somewhat.

I wonder how much the tow driver wanted for the tow back to BM......I dont think AAA covers off-road rescues

[Elorrum]

Yes, TK. Truth be told, give me sparkle ponies over this sort of shlemazle.
How would the tow truck driver be looking for and find the van to tow it out from the top of a hill?
How did the guy get through gate with no vehicle?
Did the girl have an early entry pass?

is this like fight club? (spoiler alert)



where the two characters are really just one person?

[MyDearFriend]

Yes, TK. Truth be told, give me sparkle ponies over this sort of shlemazle.
How would the tow truck driver be looking for and find the van to tow it out from the top of a hill?
How did the guy get through gate with no vehicle?
Did the girl have an early entry pass?

is this like fight club? (spoiler alert)



where the two characters are really just one person?

Hey Elorrum you & I could buy one van between us and have a way better Burn than Josh did, doncha think?

[Elorrum]

All wheel drive van, just the ticket, MDF, and I'd leave med management to you.

[MyDearFriend]

All wheel drive van, just the ticket, MDF, and I'd leave med management to you.

Deal.

[TT120]

I call shenanigans.

The story was fun to read though.

[BBadger]

I was dismayed that the story made it sound like it was easy for miracle-ticket-squatters to obtain tickets by holding signs in Gerlach.

[Captain Goddammit]

Yeah I thought that was pretty unlikely, but how about being able to put something in the Temple an hour before it was burned. Don't I remember the Temple being closed and cordoned off the afternoon/evening of the burn?

Showing up with nothing but a gallon of water and bumming everything is the type of hippie loser crap that deserves punishment! Part of me wishes it was true!

[GreyCoyote]

File this one under "I made so many bad choices that I should be beaten with a stick".

Ya do stupid things and shit happens. Cause and effect. I wonder if he gets this now?

[Captain Goddammit]

One more hole in story. I used to be a tow truck driver... who paid the tow bill? Not the guy with $120 to his name and billing the insurance company wasn't how it worked. You pay first then get van back, then you get reimbursed.

[666isMONEY]

One more hole in story. I used to be a tow truck driver... who paid the tow bill? Not the guy with $120 to his name and billing the insurance company wasn't how it worked. You pay first then get van back, then you get reimbursed.

I had my car towed from playa to reno a few years ago, cost $800, if I didn't pay, he impounds car. (breathalizer in car shorted out when we jumped car battery, couldn't start car, manufacturer didn't tell me about the hidden fuse encased in plastic.)

[EspressoDude]

Yeah I thought that was pretty unlikely, but how about being able to put something in the Temple an hour before it was burned. Don't I remember the Temple being closed and cordoned off the afternoon/evening of the burn?

I worked with Black Rock f/x getting the temple ready for burning. The temple was closed to the general public in the morning. Perimeter was established at the temple fence line. Late morning the perimeter crew replaced the fence and the wood was placed inside the temple. The pyro crew was about 20, plus the temple crew were inside and adjacent to the temple. At the 12:00 position (man side of the temple) there were temple docents that reverently carried objects into the temple for people until about 7:30 that night.

[Roberto Dobbisano]

did someone say Van?

[ygmir]

did someone say Van?

...........GO!!!