Top Asshats of 2013

[maryanimal]

I can honestly say, no asshats crossed my path this year! Everyone I met, talked to, and hugged were kind and happy!

[Captain Goddammit]

Oh!! Me me, pick me!

[maryanimal]

Sorry Captain, you weren't an asshat! Try harder next year!

[tatonka]

some women on a bike almost hit these two kids out on the playa, she called them Darkwads and they yelled back at her Fuck You . I said Hey and they ran , was only arguement I seen all week .

[Lonesomebri]

Everyone was real cool, except for those I didn't get along with, those people are asshats.


I would put high on the list the person who stole my newbies bike at Robot Heart. And the camp that chased me off from setting up my camp on L and 8:30, so they could set up their totally chill dome and leave a huge MOOP impact, way to go!

[Sail Man]

These are always one of my favorite post burn threads

Come on peeps, I know there were some juicy asshats out there, post yer stories so those who couldn't make it can salivate vicariously

[VultureChow]

Chick who tried to ride the cougar after I asked her not to ride the cougar. She absolutely needed that picture of her straddling the cougar. Even went to the effort of standing on her tiptoes and straddling it without putting any weight on him. Then she kicked his tail while trying to dismount.

Other than that, even the few super drunk or drugged up guys I ran across were of the love everything type and not the aggressive type and moved gently on their way.

[tamarakay]

Dude who kicked fishy's van, twice.

[GreyCoyote]

Dude who kicked fishy's van, twice.

OMFG. Seriously???

[Sail Man]

Dude who kicked fishy's van, twice.

OMFG. Seriously???

Ok, thats the wrong kinda juicy

That is an asshat that needs to be gorilla glued to the front of Fishy's van for the ride home. Tailgating by Fishy encouraged. Nay! Bumper tag.

[GreyCoyote]

I watched this go down years ago:

Guy is the "Camp Boss" who doesnt do anything... Just barks random orders and gets huffy when the plebs dont respect his authority. By Friday, half the camp has left in mutiny. The guy gets shit-faced drunk and passes out in his monkey hut. Mischief ensues.

In the morning, his van has 2 feet of playa in it. On top of that, was all the moop from the camp and more than a few neighbors. Windows down. Battery missing. Keys missing. And the entire camp is gone with all the food, water, etc. (they setup again a half a mile away under the moniker "Camp Frag Da Louie", as the asshats name was Louis).

The "victim" was working his way down the street trying to get some help and sympathy. None was forthcoming AT ALL. Dunno what happened to him. He still hadn't got the van running when we left on Tuesday.

Social justice can be such a beautiful thing.

[fernley1]

While chilling out at camp Q mark, I was in back of the crowd listening to the music. This group of people dressed all in white, with fake gemstones glued to their faces, ran into me with this 6 feet high bike, looked at me like I was in the way, and didnt say anything. These asses could not park their bike where everyone else parked, no, they were "entitled" to park them where all the people were dancing and chilling out.
Other then that, everyone else I meet was nice and friendly.

[BBadger]

I watched this go down years ago:

Guy is the "Camp Boss" who doesnt do anything... Just barks random orders and gets huffy when the plebs dont respect his authority. By Friday, half the camp has left in mutiny. The guy gets shit-faced drunk and passes out in his monkey hut. Mischief ensues.

In the morning, his van has 2 feet of playa in it. On top of that, was all the moop from the camp and more than a few neighbors. Windows down. Battery missing. Keys missing. And the entire camp is gone with all the food, water, etc. (they setup again a half a mile away under the moniker "Camp Frag Da Louie", as the asshats name was Louis).

The "victim" was working his way down the street trying to get some help and sympathy. None was forthcoming AT ALL. Dunno what happened to him. He still hadn't got the van running when we left on Tuesday.

Was his van marked with "sanctuary"?

[GreyCoyote]

I watched this go down years ago:

Guy is the "Camp Boss" who doesnt do anything... Just barks random orders and gets huffy when the plebs dont respect his authority. By Friday, half the camp has left in mutiny. The guy gets shit-faced drunk and passes out in his monkey hut. Mischief ensues.

In the morning, his van has 2 feet of playa in it. On top of that, was all the moop from the camp and more than a few neighbors. Windows down. Battery missing. Keys missing. And the entire camp is gone with all the food, water, etc. (they setup again a half a mile away under the moniker "Camp Frag Da Louie", as the asshats name was Louis).

The "victim" was working his way down the street trying to get some help and sympathy. None was forthcoming AT ALL. Dunno what happened to him. He still hadn't got the van running when we left on Tuesday.

Was his van marked with "sanctuary"?

Now that is FUNNY right there.

[Captain Goddammit]

Driving the Land Yacht up 4:00 street one night with Clocks & Mirrors, a guy on a bike yelled all sorts of "Fuck You Asshole" at me for having my headlights on, saying I'd ruined his night vision. I jumped off the boat to have a personal chat with the gentleman who seemed to desire communication, but he rode away. How odd.
I know, I've got bright-ass lights on sometimes, but it's so people notice the large object approaching. It's Burning Man... there are lights, there is noise, it's not a school library.

[lucky420]

Dude who kicked fishy's van, twice.

This absolutely wins asshat of 2013! And our dear TK brought said asshat to tears in schooling him on making assumptions.

It was glorious

[GreyCoyote]

Dude who kicked fishy's van, twice.

This absolutely wins asshat of 2013! And our dear TK brought said asshat to tears in schooling him on making assumptions.

It was glorious

SWEET!

[CaffeineGirl]

Anyone, and there were many, who painted pyro and perimeter crews with lasers.

[Elorrum]

I watched this go down years ago:

Guy is the "Camp Boss" who doesnt do anything... Just barks random orders and gets huffy when the plebs dont respect his authority. By Friday, half the camp has left in mutiny. The guy gets shit-faced drunk and passes out in his monkey hut. Mischief ensues.

In the morning, his van has 2 feet of playa in it. On top of that, was all the moop from the camp and more than a few neighbors. Windows down. Battery missing. Keys missing. And the entire camp is gone with all the food, water, etc. (they setup again a half a mile away under the moniker "Camp Frag Da Louie", as the asshats name was Louis).

The "victim" was working his way down the street trying to get some help and sympathy. None was forthcoming AT ALL. Dunno what happened to him. He still hadn't got the van running when we left on Tuesday.

Was his van marked with "sanctuary"?

Now that is FUNNY right there.

[uncle sticky]

Guy I know had his art car boosted from a sound camp. That was pretty ass-hat, but his response was worse. I chalk it up to being pissed that somebody stole his M.V., but he admitted to grabbing a couple of bikes randomly to ride back to camp. He told me this story recently, and I think the look on my face told my opinion. thankfully the MV was balky, he found it quick, and returned the bike, but still

[britzbitz]

-When we arrived on Sunday night, there was an art car approaching from blocks away that had it's brights on. We were trying to find camp and couldn't read any of the signs, so we flicked our highbeams at it to let them know theirs were on. In response, they turned on some even brighter high beams (wtf, how was that even possible?). Everyone in our car was blinded, and had spots in our vision for several minutes after they passed. I'm surprised they didn't cause an accident.

-The management at the camp I was originally with, and then left.

-The guy on Bugaloo (the Dirty Beetles art car) on Saturday night who was asked to leave by his campmates. Which kind of made him snap, and he started pushing someone against a rickety railing on the roof of this 2 decker bus. Two big guys intervened and started trying to coax him down the ladder and off the bus, which apparently pissed him off more. It took the two of them probably 5-7 minutes to get him down, him being confrontational and aggressive the whole time, and he kicked one of the guys as he was going down the ladder. Somehow managed to gash the arm of one of the guys (we ended up helping him clean himself up when the bus stopped at our camp later). According to his campmates, the dude is normally "a really nice guy", and was on the wrong combination of somethings... but I do think the scene he caused earns him asshat status. It was the closest thing I've ever seen to a "fight" at Burning Man.

[name redacted]

I predict I will be on someones asshat list for 2014....

[RosieTahoe]

The woman who woke my husband and I up at 7:30am on Monday morning (after we had arrived at BRC late Sunday night) telling us that we were camped in her theme camps' area, seriously you can't wait until 9am?!? I had walked all around the night before asking EVERYONE I could find, including someone in her camp, to make sure we were camped in open camping. I had also clearly seen the blue flags in other areas marking the theme camps, but NOT in the corner where we were camping. Anyway, it turned out I was completely right, the area was NOT reserved, but it was directly adjacent to her camps area and she kept babbling on about how "people had paid a lot of money to guarantee their RV space at the camp and this area is definitely reserved, and the wind MUST have blown away all the blue flags!!" Well, I gave her a piece of my mind (California has done it's job mellowing me out, but I am a New Yorker born and raised!) and my husband wanted to just stay put and stick it to her, but I had done enough research to know you are supposed to bond with your neighbors so...

We moved across the street, and ended up getting along so well with our new neighbors that we are camping with them in 2014! So, I'm not mad, was totally meant to be. AND, the guy who I had asked the night before if we could camp there must have felt bad because he and another girl came up to us while we were re-setting up camp and gave us a beautiful metal medallion pin of the city, which I turned into a necklace and have been wearing everywhere since I returned home. So thank you lady Asshat!!

[Elderberry]

I watched this go down years ago:

Guy is the "Camp Boss" who doesnt do anything... Just barks random orders and gets huffy when the plebs dont respect his authority. By Friday, half the camp has left in mutiny. The guy gets shit-faced drunk and passes out in his monkey hut. Mischief ensues.

In the morning, his van has 2 feet of playa in it. On top of that, was all the moop from the camp and more than a few neighbors. Windows down. Battery missing. Keys missing. And the entire camp is gone with all the food, water, etc. (they setup again a half a mile away under the moniker "Camp Frag Da Louie", as the asshats name was Louis).

The "victim" was working his way down the street trying to get some help and sympathy. None was forthcoming AT ALL. Dunno what happened to him. He still hadn't got the van running when we left on Tuesday.

Social justice can be such a beautiful thing.

Hmmm. Sounds a bit harsh if you ask me.

[Nipple]

Yeah... it kind of sounds like "Social Justice" is a euphemism for "Mob rule".

Another term for that is Ochlocracy.

[BBadger]

We moved across the street, and ended up getting along so well with our new neighbors that we are camping with them in 2014! So, I'm not mad, was totally meant to be. AND, the guy who I had asked the night before if we could camp there must have felt bad because he and another girl came up to us while we were re-setting up camp and gave us a beautiful metal medallion pin of the city, which I turned into a necklace and have been wearing everywhere since I returned home. So thank you lady Asshat!!

Even asshats have their place in this circle of life.

[trilobyte]

Great job in making the most of the situation, Rosie!

[Simon of the Playa]

[media]

[Simon of the Playa]

is it too early to start a top asshats of 2014 thread?

[Elorrum]

Nous avons un bon candidat.