i think your post title is great.
it should clear up the fact that there are certain 'unsaid' bans.
no one want more 'rules'. there will be people with feathers out there. there will be people with tiki torches out there. most likely those are the people who won't be able to take the subtle hints given out here in this post or elsewhere.
here is the ultimate straight answer on campfires and tiki torches. (to the best of my ability)
NO. don't trouble yourself. you're never far away from a community burn barrel/camp fire. if you're prepared to deal with packing in all your wood and packing out 100% of your ash and you're sure the possibility of fire catastrophe is 0%,....then go ahead.(subtle hint with no restriction)
tiki torches. NO. don't trouble yourself. solar tiki torches provide 100% safe light.
don't bring feathers. (it's discouraged)(DON't BRING FEATHERS)(i know it's off subject,...just another example of how the word 'no' can be interpreted.)
if you've not attended BM then just trust those who have even if it seems they're wrong. if you want to bring tiki torches after your first experience then you know what you're in for?
save your energy for worry free enjoyment of the events.
this is not a 'normal' camping trip. you don't even have to roast marshmallows.
i like the idea of you 'search friendly' post.
good luck.
crux

blow.