Best Line Today

All things outside of Burning Man.
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lemur
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby lemur » Sat Aug 03, 2013 8:19 am

"these two bishops are talking to each other and they are lamenting the moral state of the nation.. and one says to the other 'well, i certainly didnt sleep with my wife before we were married..' and he says to the other bishop, "how about you?" ..other the bishop responds..."i dont know.. what was her maiden name?"
Don't link to anything here!

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ygmir
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby ygmir » Sat Aug 03, 2013 8:41 am

Image

ETA: wrong link. oops, double post.
YGMIR

Unabashed Nordic
Pagan

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knowmad
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby knowmad » Sat Aug 03, 2013 1:31 pm

Are you having a Stroke?
............................................Image...........................................
Oh yeah, this year I was totally twerping out at the fence. ~Lonesombri

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FIGJAM
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby FIGJAM » Tue Aug 06, 2013 3:30 pm

"It's like Santa for your vagina!"
"Don't buy ur Burn...........Build ur Burn!"

"If I can't find an answer, I'll create one!!!"

Fuck Im Good Just Ask Me

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tatonka
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby tatonka » Wed Aug 07, 2013 12:33 pm

"the trouble is you think you have time" Budda
“Two of my favorite things are sitting on my front porch smoking a pipe of sweet hemp, and playing my Hohner harmonica.” - Abraham Lincoln (from a letter written by Lincoln during his presidency to the head of the Hohner Harmonica Company in Germany)

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tatonka
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby tatonka » Sat Aug 17, 2013 8:23 pm

you have the right to remain silent , didnt have the ability .
“Two of my favorite things are sitting on my front porch smoking a pipe of sweet hemp, and playing my Hohner harmonica.” - Abraham Lincoln (from a letter written by Lincoln during his presidency to the head of the Hohner Harmonica Company in Germany)

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C.f.M.
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby C.f.M. » Sat Aug 17, 2013 9:53 pm

Some people just need a high-five.






...in the face.

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lemur
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby lemur » Sat Aug 17, 2013 10:10 pm

"the mangled corpse of a beagle wearing a fighter helmet was found in the wreckage"
Don't link to anything here!

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tatonka
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby tatonka » Wed Aug 21, 2013 11:07 am

mother nature , shes alot smarter than you .
“Two of my favorite things are sitting on my front porch smoking a pipe of sweet hemp, and playing my Hohner harmonica.” - Abraham Lincoln (from a letter written by Lincoln during his presidency to the head of the Hohner Harmonica Company in Germany)

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gyre
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby gyre » Wed Aug 21, 2013 8:58 pm

"I thought it was another meth lab blowing up."

-- response to an earthquake in the midwest
-- by a 13 year old

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gyre
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby gyre » Wed Sep 04, 2013 9:00 pm

("you could do better, you know?")

"I know. But I was blessed with very low standards."


-- from After You've Gone

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Oldguy
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby Oldguy » Tue Sep 10, 2013 11:32 am

“L'shanah tovah tikatev v'taihatem” (“May you be inscribed and sealed for a good year”). :coffee:

lothos 1162
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby lothos 1162 » Tue Sep 10, 2013 1:11 pm

Me to my 3 female rideshares...I want you to remember only 1 word...my name Andy. The girls...Why? My reply...because you'll be screaming it later through the ball gag.It really worked!

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gyre
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby gyre » Mon Sep 16, 2013 10:55 pm

" Comedy is Tragedy in long shot. "


--- Buster Keaton

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VultureChow
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby VultureChow » Tue Sep 17, 2013 8:12 pm

Went out tonight. Bartender had his iPhone plugged in for music in the whole restaurant. Server comes over and tells him the manager said to put it on airplane mode. Bartender replied, "I've got it on Van Morrison. How more airplane can I get?"
FREE THE STRIPPERS!

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gyre
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby gyre » Fri Sep 20, 2013 9:31 pm

"It sounds like the worst place in the world."


--- Jimmy Kimmel - interviewing Stacy Keebler about burning man, dust and weather


No, I've never heard of her either, but her description was pretty good.

Burning man has become far too hep for me.
Time to become a guide for Pdiddy or somebody and start another event.

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FIGJAM
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby FIGJAM » Sat Sep 21, 2013 12:55 pm

I'm against animal testing.......... they get nervous and give silly answers.
"Don't buy ur Burn...........Build ur Burn!"

"If I can't find an answer, I'll create one!!!"

Fuck Im Good Just Ask Me

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Patsh
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby Patsh » Sat Sep 21, 2013 2:40 pm

"You'd need two legs of different lengths to dance to that."
formerly, Triken

keep on triken' Mamma!
Triken' ma blues away....
.


Theatre is Life
Cinema is Art
Television is Furniture

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TomServo
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby TomServo » Thu Sep 26, 2013 6:42 pm

"Green! Fuck Yeah!"
anything worth doing is worth overdoing..

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Box Burner
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby Box Burner » Thu Sep 26, 2013 8:18 pm

while the pessimist and the optimist were arguing over whether the glass was half empty or half full, I drank it.
Dance in the heart of chaos. . . . .

ὁ δὲ ἀνεξέταστος βίος οὐ βιωτὸς ἀνθρώπῳ
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - --- Σωκράτης

.

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gyre
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby gyre » Sat Sep 28, 2013 6:03 pm

Maybe the glass is just the wrong size?


Question:
Do you smell that?

"No I don't.
And you don't either."

---- Willie Nelson

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tatonka
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby tatonka » Tue Oct 01, 2013 6:15 pm

Its better to be kind than right
“Two of my favorite things are sitting on my front porch smoking a pipe of sweet hemp, and playing my Hohner harmonica.” - Abraham Lincoln (from a letter written by Lincoln during his presidency to the head of the Hohner Harmonica Company in Germany)

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Lonesomebri
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby Lonesomebri » Wed Oct 02, 2013 8:07 pm

"The power of accurate observation is often
called cynicism by those who have not got it."
- George Bernard Shaw
"If this is the best of all possible worlds, what are the others?"
- Voltaire, Candide

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Isotopia
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby Isotopia » Mon Oct 07, 2013 5:40 pm

Best line today?

"The anus is Satan's doorbell."

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gyre
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby gyre » Mon Oct 07, 2013 8:00 pm

Who is that from?

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GreyCoyote
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby GreyCoyote » Mon Oct 07, 2013 8:39 pm

gyre wrote:Who is that from?


Uranus? :mrgreen:
"To sum up my compassion level, I think we should feed the unwanted animals to the homeless. Or visa versa. Too much attention and money is spent on both."
(A Beautiful Mind)

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TomServo
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby TomServo » Tue Oct 08, 2013 9:27 am

"You rape my ears, every time you play Dubstep."
anything worth doing is worth overdoing..

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BBadger
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Location: (near) Portland, OR, USA

Re: Best Line Today

Postby BBadger » Wed Oct 09, 2013 2:33 am

Aspirations are what are put in obituaries in place of actual accomplishments.
"The essence of tyranny is not iron law. It is capricious law." -- Christopher Hitchens

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Elliot
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby Elliot » Wed Oct 09, 2013 10:05 am

Good one. And same concept as...

"You cannot build a reputation on what you are going to do." -Henry Ford
Elliot's Naked Bicycle Service & Piano Bar - Noon-6 daily.

------Bike come unglued? Take it to the nude dude!------

Website: http://www.elliotsbikes.org

Awesome? Yes, Ma'am, we do Awesome. Please step right in.

Image

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BBadger
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Re: Best Line Today

Postby BBadger » Sat Oct 12, 2013 5:21 am

"Give it time. One day America will have a bacon scented, red, white, and blue $9.11 note depicting a crying bald eagle resting atop a set of dueling pistols, staring solemnly at gigantic praying Jesus hands, painted on a stock car that's filled to the brim with Big Macs and ammunition."

-- From a comment about currency notes on The Atlantic.
"The essence of tyranny is not iron law. It is capricious law." -- Christopher Hitchens

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