Best Line Today

gyre · Post by **gyre** » Wed Jul 07, 2010 2:14 pm

Doesn't matter where it comes from if you like it.

Post more than one if you like.

"Promenade, you son of a bitch!"

Cassidy · Post by **Cassidy** » Wed Jul 07, 2010 2:17 pm

"It's DefendOR!"

EDIT: dam, forgot quotes

Cassidy · Post by **Cassidy** » Wed Jul 07, 2010 2:27 pm

Discussing wearing tutus on Tutu Tuesday, with a Virgin:

"Do they make those for men?"

"Sure. They wear them in Swan Lake." (ok, I made that part up... but then:)

"Oh....... I've never been there."

{{gasping-for-air-laughter ensues}}

illy dilly · Post by **illy dilly** » Wed Jul 07, 2010 2:43 pm

Telling a guy I work with to try a sandwich shop down the street,
his response
"Na, I want something smothered in something"

FIGJAM · Post by **FIGJAM** » Wed Jul 07, 2010 2:55 pm

Deer hunting and 2 guys were setting up camp about 100ft. away. dark 30 and they had no lights showing. We hear "Throw me the knife".

Trishntek · Post by **Trishntek** » Wed Jul 07, 2010 3:59 pm

When simply recalling Robert Duvall's line in "Apocalypse Now", "I love the smell of napalm in the morning." My neighbor replied,

"I didn't know palm trees smell different in the morning!"

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Wed Jul 07, 2010 5:15 pm

to a gal I was trying to impress with my music:

"do you like Jimi Hendrix"?

her reply:

I really don't like country music much.............

FaeTora · Post by **FaeTora** » Wed Jul 07, 2010 5:18 pm

My Little Sister, "I heard of these great new bands: Green Day, Nirvana, and Depeche Mode. Have you heard of them?"

oneeyeddick · Post by **oneeyeddick** » Wed Jul 07, 2010 5:25 pm

My new neighbors(from Alaska)

I say... " GOOD MORNING !!!"...@ 8:20 a.m.

She says..(in her houserobe and curlers)

" Every time you do that IT SHAKES OUR WHOLE HOUSE !! "

I find irony in this because they live in a trailor.
I wonder if they thought thier igloo was a house also???

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Wed Jul 07, 2010 5:31 pm

oneeyeddick wrote:My new neighbors(from Alaska)

I say... " GOOD MORNING !!!"...@ 8:20 a.m.

She says..(in her houserobe and curlers)

" Every time you do that IT SHAKES OUR WHOLE HOUSE !! "

I find irony in this because they live in a trailor.
I wonder if they thought thier igloo was a house also???

I'm just guessing here, but, thinking there is more to your "good morning" and, a smile and friendly wave?

details, please..........

FaeTora · Post by **FaeTora** » Wed Jul 07, 2010 5:34 pm

maybe he is yelling so loud that the earth beneatht hem shakes. Don't yell at BM, preparing for all situations may have gotten harder if you do.

oneeyeddick · Post by **oneeyeddick** » Wed Jul 07, 2010 5:55 pm

it went something like this...

[youtube][/youtube]

Post by **Elderberry** » Wed Jul 07, 2010 8:02 pm

Read on Twitter: I just molested myself. I said no, but I knew I wanted it.

JK

Post by **Elderberry** » Wed Jul 07, 2010 9:26 pm

Another one from Twitter: I don't mean to brag, but the tampons I wore in high school still fit.

JK

ohCarie · Post by **ohCarie** » Wed Jul 07, 2010 10:57 pm

A sparkle pony who is a birgin this year said in response to my invitation to attend a BM planning get-together this weekend, "Nah, I mean it's only 4 days [that I'm camping in the desert when I have only done 2 weekend trips to powered campgrounds in 3 years]."

gyre · Post by **gyre** » Thu Jul 08, 2010 4:56 pm

~My Name Is Earl~

On cold nights we slept like babies.
But this wasn't just because of the temperature.

Catalina: Gas leak, get up, you're all being poisoned.

Randy: Five more minutes.

Catalina: cheerfully... Five minutes, you'll be dead.

Randy: Four more minutes?

Ranger Genius · Post by **Ranger Genius** » Thu Jul 08, 2010 11:16 pm

Re: the phrase "funny as hell:"

Actually, the only thing that's funny about hell is that people believe in it. Which is both funny and sad. Kinda like a smoking monkey.

C.f.M. · Post by **C.f.M.** » Fri Jul 09, 2010 6:16 am

I like my women like I like my toast. Hot and slathered in butter.

Fire_Moose · Post by **Fire_Moose** » Fri Jul 09, 2010 7:05 am

Haha

"I like my wimmin like I like my coffee: Ground up and in the freezer"

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Fri Jul 09, 2010 7:14 am

C.f.M. wrote:I like my women like I like my toast. Hot and slathered in butter.

Brando fan, CFM?...............

C.f.M. · Post by **C.f.M.** » Fri Jul 09, 2010 7:20 am

ygmir wrote:
C.f.M. wrote:I like my women like I like my toast. Hot and slathered in butter.
Brando fan, CFM?...............

I'm dairy free...I forget what that line was from. Whitest Kids You Know, maybe?

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Fri Jul 09, 2010 7:25 am

C.f.M. wrote:
ygmir wrote:
C.f.M. wrote:I like my women like I like my toast. Hot and slathered in butter.
Brando fan, CFM?...............

I'm dairy free...I forget what that line was from. Whitest Kids You Know, maybe?

303jewels · Post by **303jewels** » Fri Jul 09, 2010 8:22 am

''sounds like a skeleton having a wank in a biscuit tin''
(my cars engine)

C.f.M. · Post by **C.f.M.** » Fri Jul 09, 2010 10:44 am

Oh, I knew you were referencing Last Tango. Hence my little advert. I meant my initial line about butter.

"I like my women like I like my coffee."

"Hot and dribbling in your lap?"

ygmir · Post by **ygmir** » Fri Jul 09, 2010 11:24 am

just playin' along, CFM..........you are good.

C.f.M. · Post by **C.f.M.** » Fri Jul 09, 2010 11:35 am

Fresh off the Transformus list, LIFE WORDS.

"Don't be stupid y'all."

VeganChoirGirl · Post by **VeganChoirGirl** » Fri Jul 09, 2010 5:03 pm

I am an admin, sitting at my desk, heard my boss (who doesn't have children) say into his phone, "I'm going to have Care Bears and rainbow." I DEFINATELY want to know wtf that was about.

Rice · Post by **Rice** » Fri Jul 09, 2010 5:49 pm

My 16 year old son's response to my offer to take him to BRC: "There is no way in HELL that I am going to that Hippie-Fest!!!"

me: "Are you sure?, there will be naked people there.", thinking that might sweeten the deal

him: "NO Fucking way!!!"

FaeTora · Post by **FaeTora** » Fri Jul 09, 2010 8:02 pm

Today at work - "I don't know their last name, I'm just invited to the wedding."

gyre · Post by **gyre** » Fri Jul 09, 2010 9:46 pm

"No experience required."

"No experience?
You've got a lot of that."

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